Caption Competition Mk III

[Kiltrash]

Ah Commander Sharkey, so you have the RAF one side and the RN on the other ... don't you mind which side you swing too?

[Kiltrash]

So what happened to your Kettle drum? I just fancied a nice cup of Earl Grey....with my marmalade sandwich..

[Kiltrash]

Look out your Maj, the just stop oil protestors just got through ...
'ere give me that cant have them disturbing the Flower Show.

[Buster Hyman]

I don't care if you are going to Glastonbury Ma'am, you can't take it with you!

[NutLoose]

Ok will score on Tuesday if that’s ok.

[Kiltrash]

Seems a strange comment from Camila said Charles...but whatever floats her boat I suppose.

[Kiltrash]

Oh can we please hurry along, I still have a Hospital to close and a Asylum Barge to officially open...

[Kiltrash]

Well, thought the Senior Officer, could have been worse, of all the ' working Royals ' we could have got Edward.

[fdr]

Ma'am it would help a lot of the Royal Family all had the same initials, any chance of a quick pass to Ed?

[Kiltrash]

At my age I don't see how her Maj managed to stand for the whole event....without regular toilet breaks.

[Kiltrash]

Flag bearer thinks...Phew, someone forgot the underarm deodorant...
or
Anyone smell fish..

[Kiltrash]

Queen Victoria sends the military off to plant the flag and increase the size of her Empire...

[fdr]

Queen Victoria sends the military off to plant the flag and increase the size of her Empire...

Blackadder goes forth

[NutLoose]

https://cimg8.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1200x800/image_4e122b5bedde8095d0c6c481cdafb815c1b0c929.png


Ok on to the scoring

BPF with

Ohh Brilliant, my new drapes have arrived !
AND
Ahhh So this is the flag AVM Wigston disgraced.

Treddi with

Shove it where Ma'am? And what about your hat boxes?

Dan G with

Mmm, well it's alright, but I was really after something in a red.

But I am going to give it too Big Pistons Forever with

Ahhh So this is the flag AVM Wigston disgraced.

Mine would have been something like

I say Group Captain why does your man keep saying "They don't like it up 'em, Theey don't like it up 'em?"

[Big Pistons Forever]

https://cimg3.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/285x177/img_0080_b41395e712fabc1f24b041d8dd1d27f686342f47.jpeg
Here you go boys….

[MPN11]

"Damn, missed him ..."

[treadigraph]

The display line at the Nant Gwynant International Airshow was always a little tight...

[treadigraph]

Dai began to regret painting "piss off Biggles" on his cow shed roof...

[sealo0]

While we’re here how about some ear piercing!

[cavuman1]

Hawk in Mach Loop hooks belt loop of fruit loop.

- Ed

[Commando Cody]

" Again, sorry about not having a telephoto lens, but this time both of you smile for the camera".

[NutLoose]

Eeeee, when ‘are was a lad, thee operated nine of ‘em.

[Kiltrash]

Farmer descided to get tough with the dog walkers worrying his sheep..

[Kiltrash]

Initial trials of the 90 - 90 bangseat get underway.

[Kiltrash]

Dominick Cummins finally descided his eyesight was adversely affected by Covid..3 years later

[Kiltrash]

The BOI later reported the accident was caused by a Fox Strike...

[Kiltrash]

The photographer later took BPF to court for asserting they wished to be classed as Male..

[fdr]

F-700: DEFECT: Suspected Birdstrike. RECTIFICATION: No evidence of birdstrike found. Canon 70-300 zoom found in RH aileron horn. Removed, RTS.

[Ascend Charlie]

Should have gone to SpecSavers...

[Hydromet]

"A bit sideways on the roundout, Hoskins."

[Buster Hyman]

“Too close for missiles, switching to….ahh crap. Never mind.”

[Buster Hyman]

Did you see the Red Arrows?
I didn’t even see the Indians!

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

That? Oh that's the gate guardian for RAF Twll Cachu Cymraeg. You can see the entrance track going up the hill beside it.

[fdr]

re-enactment of "Bang-out Bills" 2nd of 3 ejections.

[Kiltrash]

Hell of a climb just see one single (sparrow)hawk complained Nutty. That'll never get me into the BBC Wildlife calendar 2024...
How about Aviation weekly? Suggested Treaders.

[Kiltrash]

Welsh Police ask for Ariel assistance to enforce parking restrictions ....
or
Nav to Pilot....I have some cracking pictures of the dogging going on down there...
Pilot...We can sell them to Readers Wives..

[Kiltrash]

Nav suggested stopping to ask him for directions back to Valley...
Pilot wished he was in a single seater

[Buster Hyman]

Rock n roll…

[treadigraph]

https://cimg3.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/285x177/img_0080_b41395e712fabc1f24b041d8dd1d27f686342f47.jpeg

[treadigraph]

Red 7 to Red 1, can we have a bit more altitude in the turns please Boss...

[Kiltrash]

Gp Cp Farley thought he was in a Kestral ..

[Confusious]

Look boss, Bill Oddie's out hawk spotting again.

[Dan Gerous]

Double top to win.

https://cimg3.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/285x177/img_0080_b41395e712fabc1f24b041d8dd1d27f686342f47.jpeg

[jolihokistix]

Hang on a mo', what channel is this? That's not my drone!

[NutLoose]

Hell of a climb just see one single (sparrow)hawk complained Nutty. That'll never get me into the BBC Wildlife calendar 2024...
How about Aviation weekly? Suggested Treaders.

But I was on the BBC Autumwatch page 2017.... :p

[Chu Chu]

Say again QNH.

[Wensleydale]

No. We're landing at Valley in Wales!

[NutLoose]

I see the fuel is transferring to the stb tank again, remind me to snag it when we get home.

[NutLoose]

The hills are alive with the sound of music.........

[treadigraph]

When the red red Hawk comes fawk fawk fawkin' along...

[Buster Hyman]

Well yes, I did just deliver a 757 to Argentina. Why do you ask?

[Kiltrash]

Having been through basic traing Algernon was aghast at being chopped. Later revealed in a freedom of information request, to be a Useless white male.

[Kiltrash]

Just then clouds of Red, White and Blue came out the efflux pipe.....of the Photographer's ar$e

[Kiltrash]

The photographer wished he has pressed the shutter button a millisecond later...as the Raptor went past...and caught the Hawk in mid flight...

[Kiltrash]

Instructor to Student....Dont think even International Rescue could save us in tim....

[SLXOwft]

You are sure there is clearance between us, Red 7 and the terrain for this Crossbow?

[SLXOwft]

RAFAT are getting desperate looking for new display airspace following the latest Scampton announcement..

[SLXOwft]

I have perfect faith in the engine, this is a T.1.

[jolihokistix]

Sunak watches delivery of Britain's upgraded, inclusive colour-scheme, eco-friendly VIP Voyager.

[Kiltrash]

He'll never sell any ice cream going at that speed.

[Kiltrash]

Dog sitting by spotter thinks...he promised me a nice quiet walk in the hills and look where we end up...no wonder he can't get a 'female ' life partner..

[Kiltrash]

WAVE ...you dumb barstewards...i'll ever get a picture in ' Show us your Friendly Aircrew ' monthly..

[sealo0]

Ooh wait! Go back a bit, that’s my brother down there!

[fitliker]

Mountain rescue helicopters replaced by a more rapid response unit , should be great once they get the short hillside landings perfected . Or not

[fitliker]

Not what I had expected when they promised to take me camping

[Kiltrash]

That's .not low level flying.. I'll show you LOOOW LEVEL said Mav as he ran in to bomb the undisclosed middle Eastern countries Uranium Enrichment facility....that gives me a great idea for a movie.
or
Unless you have to get clods of earth and grass off your undercarriage. ..

[Kiltrash]

Just then Phil ' The Power ' Taylor scored a double 25 to win the PDC Darts championship....Van Gerwin later descided to find a even more difficult scenario for next year.

[Kiltrash]

Typical Bank Holiday, you wait hours for one ...and then 9 all come along together.

[SLXOwft]

The photo interpreters were unable to conclusively state the image was of 'three useless white males'.

[SLXOwft]

The Valley MRT weren't expecting FW support for their exercise.

[Wensleydale]

"It's a Mohican".

"No. Definitely a Hawk I".

[cavuman1]

Hawk pilot thinks: "What's a backpacker doing up in these mountains?" Just then, a nanny goat head-butts the photographer off of the cliff....

- Ed

[Kiltrash]

Spotter Spotting...

[Kiltrash]

Meanwhile 500 feet below the Independent Car Park wardens were having a field day with their delivery of brand new Denver Boots. 🚗

[Kiltrash]

Jonny ' no mates ' gets a once in a lifetime picture. However later discovered the lens cap was still on ..

[622]

"Red leader ...you appear to have brown smoke?"

" .....thats not smoke!! :eek:"

[Chu Chu]

Hoskins, when I pointed at the map and said "fly just below that ridge," what I meant was . . .

[NutLoose]

I think we have a leak Sir,
We're in Wales Hoskins, here they call it a leek
Regardless of where we are Sir, it's pissing out of the port wing as an alarming rate...

[NutLoose]

Sir, you are worrying the sheep.....
I don't think it's us Lad, I think it's that Welshman.

[NutLoose]

https://cimg7.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/285x177/image_4b453b806deec60c6fd6d5644fdd103a783d3d6a.png

[Big Pistons Forever]

Whoop Whoop Judging tomorrow

[Kiltrash]

His wife later reported him missing ..5 years later

[Kiltrash]

Knew I should have not taken my fly fishing cap ..

[Kiltrash]

Beam me up Scotty...BEAM ME UP SCOTTY...PLEASE

[Kiltrash]

PO PPRuNe was determined to be the first down the hill and claim the Cheese rolling prize on Bank Holiday Monday

[Kiltrash]

Red 1 was surprised just how fast the hills rose up at the end of the runway...at Scampton

[Kiltrash]

If you think this is cool....just wait, the Lanc is next.

[SLXOwft]

Ooh, look it's a red kite!

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

That new Terrain Following Radar certainly gives some damn close shaves!
Er, it's not being fitted til next week sir.

[Kiltrash]

Red4 to Mountain Rescue...I think we have found Schofield.. better hurry up, think he actually means it this time.

[Kiltrash]

Great idea this said Hammod, when your lost in the Rockies, the Canadians come and find you. No need to wait for Clarkson and May.

[Kiltrash]

What the hell is Dominic doing up here, last we heard he was in Co Durham....
Eyesight dear boy eyesight...

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

Photographer thinks: Don't shoot until you see the whites of their eyes!

[Confusious]

Flight Lieutenant Hoskins was asked to do a ninety degree flypast to check the landing gear.

[NutLoose]

RAF practice, a simulated sidewinder attack profile

[NutLoose]

Yea, though I fly through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art only Welsh; and thy rodders and dia staff they comfort me.

[treadigraph]

How green is my Valley...

Uh, that wasn't us, the Frecce Tricolori led the formation...

[NutLoose]

Ok disappearing behind the hill, cue the massive petrol explosion and fireball, then it’s a cut and wrap.

[NutLoose]

Use the force Luke

[sealo0]

Skip to nav: Hoskins ? What happened on that that map reading course we sent you on last week?
Hoskins : l got lost!
skip: now you tell me !

[NutLoose]

I think we’re lost Big Pistons Forever, the end destination should be up here somewhere.

[Confusious]

Bloody road signs are in Welsh, let's just admit that we're lost!

[sealo0]

Did that sign say waddington

no it said “Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogo goch”

[fdr]

Flight Lieutenant Hoskins was asked to do a ninety degree flypast to check the landing gear.

FL LT Hoskins was asked to a ninety degree flypast to check the canopy unlock annunciation...

[fdr]

Did that sign say waddington

no it said “Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch”

The unexpected consequence of this flight path was the lowering of the transit speed to 80Kts to permit waypoint identification....

https://cimg3.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/2000x1125/article_wales_llanfair_railway_station_sign_214973607f10a15b c8525a21c4f5308f7e0ffd7d.jpeg

[Big Pistons Forever]

And the winner is…….not Nutty :p

It is fdr for this entry

F-700: DEFECT: Suspected Birdstrike. RECTIFICATION: No evidence of birdstrike found. Canon 70-300 zoom found in RH aileron horn. Removed, RTS.

​​​​​​​

[fdr]

almost certainly a rinse 'n repeat... but never less interesting!

https://cimg6.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/600x705/lightning_tractor_driver_a62405adcb86690397de6dd6113e9546713 0ef1b.jpg

[Buster Hyman]

You'll be fine just there Frank. They never strike twice in the same place!

[Buster Hyman]

Bit late on the bail out Hoskins!

[Buster Hyman]

His next assignment was delivering a 757 to Argentina!

[Big Pistons Forever]

Finders keepers !

[Big Pistons Forever]

OH so that’s what those guys mean when they say they are “buying the farm”

[Big Pistons Forever]

And they said lightning never strikes twice

[treadigraph]

Dibley Herald 1962: "Jim Trott loses straight line ploughing competition"...

[Ascend Charlie]

"NOOOO! He's headed for the glasshouse with the marijuana crop!"

[Wensleydale]

Classed as a "Major Incident".

[Wensleydale]

"Another Bl**dy Crop Circle"!!

[Wensleydale]

Well baling usually follows grass cutting in these parts.....

[Kiltrash]

There's something you don't see every day...A Massey Ferguson TE 20....

[Buster Hyman]

Thinking he was still in the Mach Loop just didn't cut it at the board of inquiry!

[Kiltrash]

All was well till the Pilot walked to the farmhouse and the farmer's wife spoke Russian...

[Buster Hyman]

Bessie the Cow was about to experience artificial insemination for the first & last time!

[Kiltrash]

Just then the Autopilot reconnected and made a perfect 3 point landing....the Daily Mail reported the Pilot had been abducted by Aliens.

[Kiltrash]

Upon searching the aircraft maintenance records this led the investigators to Nuttys locker and the stash of three inch locking nuts.

[Kiltrash]

...at least the hole In the ground will provide a watering hole for the cows....
( Hope the navigator also got out )

[Kiltrash]

Well that's nice to be out....said Schofield

[Kiltrash]

It's not the speed that kills....it's how you stop...

[Wensleydale]

Combine Ops?

[Wensleydale]

Its Friday: early (hay) stack.

[Wensleydale]

Bull night?

[treadigraph]

The tractor driver was henceforth known as a WIWNGHBAL...

[treadigraph]

Oi dived my Lightning through your 'aystack last night (ooh arr ooh arr!)

[treadigraph]

Oh bugger! That's right where we buried the village time capsule last week...

[NutLoose]

Clarkson looks on at Hammonds latest failure.

[NutLoose]

That’s three greens, gear down, Lightning down and pilot down…

[NutLoose]

I told the gamekeeper to organise a shoot, not a bloody chute..

[treadigraph]

If I don't appear In John Nichol's new book, I'll be bloody furious!

[Kiltrash]

He paid the extra for Speedy Exit..

[Kiltrash]

Later Farmer Nichols tried to persuade his son not to enter the RAF

[Kiltrash]

Keep off the grass....

[Kiltrash]

Having taken off from RAF Leuchars on QRA ...
THe Pilot was surprised just how fast the fuel ran out.
or
Wished he hadn't taken a short cut across the 10th just as Rory had a shank .

[Kiltrash]

When the newly installed HAL9000 computer realised it was Hoskins piloting, it descided it's safety was more important than the life of just one person..

[Kiltrash]

Having runover to the crash site to see what he could do for the Pilot ...was most surprised to find all these ladies undergarments in his luggage.

[SLXOwft]

... I'm sticking to Mosquitos in future..

[SLXOwft]

'E better keep off moi larnd.

[NutLoose]

There’s final approaches and there’s final approaches..

[Buster Hyman]

Last moments of the AI experiment captured as the Artificial Intelligence ejected the pilot & dived into the field with a final message of "Sod this for a lark!"

[MPN11]

The Boffins were pleased ... the ground sensor on the pitot tube linked to the ejector seat worked as intended.

[Confusious]

Right son demand a refund, and that's the last time we're hiring crop dusters.

[Kiltrash]

Fed up with dropping Piano's onto Morris Marinas, Clarkson descided to use his Gate Guardian and old farm machinery instead..

[Kiltrash]

Sir Isaac's findings on Gravity is tested to see if it is still valid

[Kiltrash]

Jamie and Adam revisit their Gravity Myth....much to Busters annoyance..

[Kiltrash]

His wife told their visitors that Barry would be dropping in soon.

[Kiltrash]

Don't worry it's only a Drone, and that's Action man

[Kiltrash]

The Farmer ran over to see if he could help the pilot... and offered to pickup his parachute.... Have you seen the price of silk stockings on the black market...

[Confusious]

Don't worry laddie, it's Kiltrash bailing out again after finding out that none of his captions have been awarded with the coveted CST.

[treadigraph]

How to plant a helmet in a hat field...

(Groan...)

[Kiltrash]

Think that Utubers are taking the desire for ' Likes ' to a whole new level.

[Chu Chu]

I knew outsourcing the MCAS to Boeing was a bad idea.

[fdr]

Lightning strikes at 12PM, GMT... last orders.

[jolihokistix]

"Yes, as a composition, not bad... Can you all hold that for a moment?"

[Kiltrash]

Feeling a bit bored with the challenge of Formula one, Max descided to take up something that makes him want to get up in the morning.

[622]

"Jeff ...quick look behind you!!!"

"My God ....that third plough blade is out of alignment!"

[NutLoose]

Just lightening the load..

[treadigraph]

As Jim steadily worked 100 Acre Field, a stone was flung into the air by his plough just as Hoskins passed overhead...

At least, that's what Hoskins told the CO.

[NutLoose]

I'm just popping out to the local garden centre dear, to see what tomato bargains they have in the greenhouses.

[sealo0]

John Nichol practicing for his book

[andytug]

Hoskins discovered far too late that VTOL had yet to be invented....

[fdr]

Calling it early due WIP

2nd loser
I knew outsourcing the MCAS to Boeing was a bad idea.

1st loser
The Boffins were pleased ... the ground sensor on the pitot tube linked to the ejector seat worked as intended.

Non Loser
Keep off the grass....

silk still to be found if you truffle snuffle around enough out there.

[Kiltrash]

Ok all, I gladly take up the plowshare Andi offer up a screengrab from a Sky News video...
https://cimg1.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/576x1280/screenshot_20230531_202007_bfe8414ff0be4db240976c5799e676ad4 aa49ed3.png

[sealo0]

Does my bum look fat in this

[Wensleydale]

"Request Steer".

[622]

RAF mooooooovers!

[622]

Right Hoskins, when it's down just pop over and undo the harness ........

[Buster Hyman]

The crew practice evacuating Nutty from his nursing home...

[Buster Hyman]

Looks like a fish, moves like a fish, steers like a cow!

[Confusious]

Special delivery for the local McDonald's.

[Buster Hyman]

I said 'Water Bucket" not "Water Bison" you idiot!

[Buster Hyman]

Bessie the Cow was about to experience artificial insemination for the first & last time!

(I'll give it another go...) :}

[Buster Hyman]

Have a guess which Pilot watched Who Dares Wins last night?

[fdr]

Lacking an IL-76, the Russian rustlers improvised...

[treadigraph]

At a secret Oxen airbase...

[622]

Right, lets see if they complain that the in-flight rations are not fresh this time!

[NutLoose]

Amazon's UAV delivers Busters new sex toy.

[NutLoose]

Locals reported a veritable sh*t storm

[treadigraph]

Heath Robinson, there has to be a simpler way to make minced beef for tonight's Bolognaise...

[jolihokistix]

At Monaco last week, motoring journalists got their first good look at the secrets of Red Bull's cunning floor. Christian Horner was not pleased.

[Buster Hyman]

Amazon's UAV delivers Busters new sex toy.
After trying yours, I needed the larger size...

[sealo0]

This is a load of old bull!

[sealo0]

Sorry this is far toooo tempting…
Hoskins I meant the CO wife not farmer John old cow!,

with apologies to anyone offended

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

Error in transcription results in first successful firing from helicopter of wire-guided COW missile.

[Chu Chu]

Hoskins, the manual says to lift the cowling. If there weren’t any calves, you at least could have found a heifer.

[NutLoose]

Don't stand udder a slung load, me old chief used to tell me..

[NutLoose]

Economical too, it can do quite a few miles to the pint.

[fdr]

100' should tenderise...

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

Meanwhile, above the backstreets of Pamplona, a member of the El Toro Special Forces fast ropes in.

[622]

At least it comes with its own wire strike cutters fitted!

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

The cow, named Goddess, was airlifted after suffering injuries in an apparent fight. Soon after arriving at the hospital, vets announced her condition as "delicious".

[622]

UFO - Unidentified Flying Offal

[treadigraph]

Houstons, we heifer problem...

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

For superb tasting beef, dry-hanging can never start soon enough.

[cavuman1]

The Popeil Bessie Copter uses pure methane as fuel.

- Ed

[jolihokistix]

Testing Day for the new heavy lift, high impact sports bra.

[treadigraph]

They are literally on a low flying exercise....

[Confusious]

Newsflash
Pilot picks up horny fat cow named Goddess. Sources believe that he's flying her to pastures new.

[622]

I've heard of pulled pork ....but never winched beef!

[NutLoose]

We intend to dangle it over the mexican border as a piñata then after a couple of whacks release it amongst them.

[treadigraph]

After reading of the Philippino fishing boat (apocryphally) sunk by a cow, the Ukrainians hit on an idea to deal with more Russian Navy vessels... "we need a bigger drone though..."

[Buster Hyman]

Pilot noted that the slung load was a little Jerky...

[fdr]

unable to decide whether to hoof it or airlift, a compromise was arrived at, avoiding the horns of the dilemma.

[cavuman1]

This pilot has a real beef with the Base Commander.

- Ed

[Chu Chu]

Thank goodness Kiltrash put me on CapComp.
Otherwise he’d be milking me dry.

[SLXOwft]

Just another milk run.

[MPN11]

I’m cowed into submission by the quality of the inputs this time!

[Kiltrash]

Keep the puns comming and I will put you out of your misery...humanly... Last orders judging about 3 pm UK tomorrow..

[Wensleydale]

A new version of conkers...

[Wensleydale]

The Boss said that this job was a load of bullocks.

[SLXOwft]

I said it was as stupid heifair tasking order

[Ascend Charlie]

"OK, roll the cameras, we've got the cat and the fiddle and the laughing dog, cue the cow onto the backdrop of the moon, and hey diddle diddle, we've got a mooovie!"

[Chu Chu]

Well, I told that farmer a thing or two. And I never make empty threats.

Hoskins, you do know that isn't a donkey, right?

[Big Pistons Forever]

For the first time in months there will be fresh beef in the mess for dinner !

[Big Pistons Forever]

Low bid catering in the RAF is out of control.....

[Chu Chu]

Beware of la vache!

So what's new? There's always downwash.

[Big Pistons Forever]

It was supposed to be a spoof of the saying “when pigs can fly” but it didn’t go quite according to plan…..

[treadigraph]

Heath Robinsosn invents the muck spreader...

[jolihokistix]

At last, a helicopter with a decent pilot (cow catcher).

[sealo0]

More fairy tales from the MOD

[jolihokistix]

Pilot to cow: "How now, brown cow?"
Cow to pilot: "Ahhhh yes, that's much more comfortable, thanks."

[treadigraph]

Er, Jim, that's not the pylon youve picked up...

[NutLoose]

There is flying cattle class and flying cattle class.

[NutLoose]

Bloody moovers

[Buster Hyman]

Chinese Chopper Pilot: "Ok, let's watch the Imperialist Pigs shoot this down!"

[NutLoose]

Does this make us stakeholders in the company?

[NutLoose]

There he is, head for that Russian waving his red flag.

[622]

Hoskins, when you asked if you could hang a lucky mascot during flights .....I assumed you meant a rabbits foot or something from the mirror!

[Wensleydale]

The reviewing officer arrives for the Graduation from Shawbury:

"The Red Bull gives you Wings".

[SLXOwft]

Indian government expresses outrage at Pakistan Air Forces's tactic to deter small arms fire aimed at its helicopters fliying near the Kashmir line of control.

[Kiltrash]

I was thinking along the lines that..
Owing to a shortage of Baby Milk after the Russians hit that dam, the MMB swing into action by delivering Milk on tap to the flooded areas,,,

However as usual a great selection of puns, far to many to list however the runner up is Treaders ,,,

At a secret Oxen airbase...

...and the proud re precipitant of the life size CST.... Cow Starter Trophy is SLXO ...

Just another milk run.

You have the honour SLXO...

[SLXOwft]

Many thanks K - PM received, will put something up after working hours ;)

[Kiltrash]

Many thanks K - PM received, will put something up after working hours ;)

As a retired person with 3 pensions I don't worry about Working Hours 😊

[SLXOwft]

I tried to resist but it has to be a certain retiree...
https://cimg4.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/2000x1176/wiggo_f13641a7cda8d8ddef7d1173d0d771fc733a9bdf.jpg

[Kiltrash]

Yes Sir, we call it Johnny 6.... No 5 had a crush on Ms Sheedy and blew a fuse

[Ascend Charlie]

Speak softly, and carry a big stick...

[Kiltrash]

Yes Minister, it detects speed cameras and saves you having to claim the speeding fines on expenses

[Kiltrash]

I am not sure why but it does speak...with a Chinese accent.

[Kiltrash]

...and this detects Paparazzi and La@ers them your Highness

[sealo0]

If Johnny 5 is alive it needs input

[Kiltrash]

Ah Mr Wigston, I presume.....what are you doing here, you were sacked a couple of days ago...Johnny, please show him the door.

[Wensleydale]

...and this checks just how white your pilot recruits are.

[Buster Hyman]

Yes, yes, it’s a wonderful piece of kit, but let’s just talk about your Comb-over for a moment…