Caption Competition Mk III

[MPN11]

GL: “You failed Annual Assessments, so now you will form next Paralympics Team. Now go draw Lottery Tickets, and proceed to see waiting Surgeons.”

[NutLoose]

Friends, Countrymen, lend me your ears…. Ohh hang on, I’ve already had those removed for your last indiscretions …ok we try, Beware of the “Eyes” of March.

[fitliker]

The beatings will continue until morale improves

[fitliker]

It might be funny when your have a kimchi fart in a tank , but who is gonna take the blame for that tasty drop of dragons breath wafting the fear into those familiar with special target practices of da boss .

Not only can they smell it , they can taste it
Bon appetite

[fitliker]

Fresh from the local industrial school of sanitation , Volunteer suicide squads preparing to change the leaders overly ripe undergarments .

[Dan Gerous]

The crews were getting impatient, waiting for the notebook wielding generals to turn up.

https://cimg5.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/2000x1124/r_1__1b8c6633a4c9842c11c32577cb1387410adde71f.jpg

[Dan Gerous]

Get your hand off my knee. Why can't you tweek my nipple like Kim over there.

[Dan Gerous]

Frowns to the left of me,
Saddo's to the right,
Here I am,
Stuck in the middle with you.

[Hydromet]

When the NK army decided to play Rugby, there was no shortage of people wanting to play in the forwards. Perhaps they misunderstood when they were told that they'd have to support the hooker.

[NutLoose]

Kim visits the Air Forces class of 21 at their graduation ceremony to let them know they have been chosen to form an elite squadron of cruise missile pilots.

[treadigraph]

Attempts to give the Glorious Leader the bumps on his birthday failed - even LFO realised that being dropped might be so bad for his health that he'd be unable to ensure it was bad for the health of the culprits - so they settled for a group hug!

[Buster Hyman]

Nobody gets as excited about Transfer Deadline Day than the North Koreans!

[fitliker]

That awful moment when you realize that last fart was not a fart
First one to speak gets to search for land mines blindfolded and barefoot

[fitliker]

Friends, Countrymen, lend me your ears…. Ohh hang on, I’ve already had those removed for your last indiscretions …ok we try, Beware of the “Eyes” of March.

Gonna have to declare a winner if I may .
Paraphrasing Shakespeare is almost as much fun as quoting The flying circus .
Well done NutLoose .
You have control .

Honourable mentions to some well thought out witty replies .

[NutLoose]

Well that was unexpected, thank you, ok on with the next one and a link for those that struggle to find pictures :)


https://cimg1.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/464x700/image_ac8f623ec8aec15eca1b9344a54f39d1e26def4a.png

https://englishrussia.com/2012/05/07/color-photos-of-soviet-soldiers-during-wwii/

[ResBunny]

Comrade. Are you sure that just by putting a condom over each detonator that you will stop it from “blowing everywhere”?

[treadigraph]

It's OK, it's one of ours...

[cattletruck]

Comrade Victor administers the first dose of Sputnik.

[treadigraph]

Hmmmm. The label says "Achtung Minen". What does that mean?

(With due thanks to Spike M!)

[treadigraph]

This time we'll really do for Albert Trotter RN!

[andytug]

"Don't worry boys, save your arms, I've got a great idea - just one pull of this pin and we'll be back on the ship in no time!"

[Ninthace]

Are you sure that is a mooring buoy?

[Ninthace]

Be of good cheer me hearties, the lieutenant says he knows what he is doing!

[treadigraph]

Do I cut the blue one - or the green one?

Errr... they both look red to me...

[treadigraph]

It says "to disarm, hit any of the knobs very hard". Pass me the sledgehammer...

[MPN11]

"Faster! The cosmonaut's oxygen won't last much longer."

[Ninthace]

Right chaps, a quick tap and we'll be: " 🎶 Riding along on the crest of a wave 🎶 "

[MPN11]

“This label says ‘Do not Recycle’”

[treadigraph]

It's OK lads, he's a mine engineer.

But Captain, he maintained the lifts in a coal mine...

[fitliker]

Meine Liebe you have returned to me , my love

[Chu Chu]

Wait a minute, Hoskins transposed the coordinates. Lift it back into the boat.

[Chu Chu]

Luckily I had the foresight to liberate a book on mine warfare. Here it is -- "Mein Kampf."

[treadigraph]

Shhh! It's a surprise for Kiltrash when he comes down from his Welsh Mountain...

[treadigraph]

Mein Gott! It's one of Nicki Minaj's cousin's friend's testicles... she's right, not only is it swollen it even looks like a Corona virus!

[cynicalint]

it's not yours, it's mine!

[Chu Chu]

Careful, it looks horny.

[cavuman1]

Suddenly, Gilligan's Island wasn't funny anymore.

- Ed

[Ascend Charlie]

"It says, "Please leave here, to be collected by the Titanic. Best wishes, the Iceberg Mine Company.""

[cavuman1]

"Does your min explud?"
BOOM!
"I thought you said zat your min does not explud!"
"Zat iz not mine mine!"

https://cimg6.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/200x200/clouseau_panther_strikes_again_88dab3e3bb5fc8ffdd2bdcce0d6d8 fa044c5a64c.jpg

- Inspector Ed

[Chu Chu]

Okay, now we can bring it alongside under the oars and close the mine-shaft gap.

[Hydromet]

It's OK, it's one of ours...
No it's not, it's mine!

Edit: Oops, beaten by Cynicalint.

[Hydromet]

"...and this time, Hoskinski, you will NOT do your trick with the brown paper bag!"

[Big Pistons Forever]

What could possibly go wrong ?

[Big Pistons Forever]

Sigh…..the Petty Officer said it was just going to be a nice row around the harbour…..

[Big Pistons Forever]

Wow, the boys said they were going to frag that SOB, but this was is a little over the top !

[Big Pistons Forever]

Are you sure it is a practice mine ?

[fitliker]

Hit it harder comrade , I have had enough of mystery meat soups and hard toilet paper .

[Buster Hyman]

"...err...hang on....oh, there it is. B12!"
"...BINGO!"

[Buster Hyman]

"Open other side.... Damn!"

[Buster Hyman]

"It's from the French Government, attention Scott Morrison"

[Chu Chu]

Belay that! The Commissar informs us there is no mine. Private property has been abolished.

[Chu Chu]

Or along the same lines:

Private property has been abolished, but this is still about oars and mine.

[Chu Chu]

Isn't Lolita too young for you?

Not at all. I'm a miner myself.

[treadigraph]

Oh look! It's a mine of information!

[cynicalint]

Photographic evidence that the Russians conspired to extract Covid DNA so the Chinese could miniaturise it.

[cynicalint]

A seal at the nuclear submarine waste disposal facility gets its annual vets check-up.

[622]

No, it’s not ticking……but it does keep saying exterminate!

[Chu Chu]

You know the saying "better dead than Red"? We're about to find out if it's true.

[Chu Chu]

Wait -- our Lend Lease shipment just came in from American Boeing. It's a Mine Charge Abatement System.

That's funny, I could have sworn it said "Augmentation." My mind must be playing tricks.

[Big Pistons Forever]

What does it say on that placard ?

Ummmm “Do not touch here”…..

[622]

The navy really take their games of cookers seriously!

[treadigraph]

It's from the French. And addressed to the Royal Australian Navy.

[fitliker]

Sadly ineffective against rubber invasion dinghies sent by the French in the English Channel,
Maybe if they sharpen those pointy thingies ?

[NutLoose]

Last orders ish, will try to score tomorrow

[treadigraph]

Eeny meeny miney moe...
This damn thing's about to blow!

[Chu Chu]

But this looks nothing like Marcel Marceau.

[Chu Chu]

First we have to identify the type of mine.

Looks like an iron mine.

[622]

Make a note will you Jackson....on the Mk2 we must fit an electronic fuse...this one is all soggy and won't light!

[622]

On a similar vein to one of my earlier entries .....

After crossing the harbour the Dalek is awarded his swimming badge.

[treadigraph]

Sheisskopf passed this after eating zer sauerkraut unt bratwurst last night? Mein Gott!

[NutLoose]

Ok the Winner is MPN11 with

“This label says ‘Do not Recycle’”

The runner up is
Chu Chu with

Belay that! The Commissar informs us there is no mine. Private property has been abolished.

over to MPN :)

[MPN11]

Oh,thank you Sir. You do realise I’m retired, and will now have to make a decision later this week! Oh, the agony!!

Have at this one, folks. Should be fun ….


https://cimg5.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1600x1157/ce3abad1_d619_418c_b823_770096445a83_8116689b4f12f7abbedb3b9 dcfe34a3c01c2cae3.jpeg

[andytug]

"BUILD THE WALL!!!"

[Ninthace]

Alors, vous comptez à dix pendant que nous fuyons!

[andytug]

First one of you varmints starts whistlin' Dixie gets a musket ball between the eyes....

[Chu Chu]

Zut! What's an honest deserter supposed to do?

Maybe if we don't look at them, they'll go away.

[cattletruck]

This was the punishment for answering the bridge troll's question unwisely.

[NutLoose]

I think we have done quite well men, zer president can announce ve have closed und secured our borders against der... aa aaa aaaa AAachoooo Covid virus.

[NutLoose]

Ven ve flee, Klaus, you vill stay and hold zer border, zat is vhy ve have tied zer rope around your todger...

[NutLoose]

We are the thin blue line, well we used to be until Mavis washed our uniforms.

[treadigraph]

Der fence? Zis is der fence!

[treadigraph]

Sir! They won't give us our ball back!

[MPN11]

*** FYI, in case you didn’t recognise it, it’s the France/Switzerland border in WW1. Other borders also exist. ***

[cynicalint]

The French build an anti-submarine net on the road to the nearest dock leaving for Australia.

[cavuman1]

Vite! Vite! Mes amis - quickly to bring ze garlique, ze frommage, and ze white flag!

- Edvard

[NutLoose]

What do we do if they decide to walk around our barricade Uncle Pierre?

[NutLoose]

Merde, c’est Isoler la France

[NutLoose]

I told you, you were holding the map upside down, this is the wrong front.

[Chu Chu]

Further evidence that nothing interesting ever happens in Switzerland.

[Chu Chu]

Switzerland mobilizes its forces on the French border (Cpl. Ementaler is on sick call).

[treadigraph]

Look out, here comes that Steve McQueen fella...

We're ready for him Captain!

[treadigraph]

Is that someone hanging washing on your line, Siegfried?

[Kiltrash]

The PPRuNe Cap Com Police welcome Kiltrash back from his Wales holiday with scarcely disguised joy....abundant.....

[Kiltrash]

Little known fact, In WW1 colour film was in everyday use.

[Kiltrash]

The Welsh Covid Rules mean that English Tourists are turned away, unless they understand Welsh Car Park Machines ...no wait that's for another picture in the future, Marty

[Kiltrash]

' Ere Kraut, you and whose army?

[Wensleydale]

We need another four for Volleyball. (...and so the Air Force Fire Service was born).

[Wensleydale]

Why has Maginot gone running to the telephone?

[Big Pistons Forever]

WHAT ! No wine with lunch ! That's it, we all quit !

[Big Pistons Forever]

Good job men, I bet that squirrel will never get over the fright we just gave him !

[Ascend Charlie]

"We are the Judean people's Front. Those people behind us are the People's Front of Judea. We don't talk to them."

[Dan Gerous]

Are we at the right gig? That banner over there says, "American Civil War Re-enactment Society".

https://cimg5.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1600x1157/ce3abad1_d619_418c_b823_770096445a83_8116689b4f12f7abbedb3b9 dcfe34a3c01c2cae3.jpeg

[Buster Hyman]

Well, of course its the Swiss border. Look at all the holes in the fence!

[Buster Hyman]

Franz was really proud of his Musket, until Fritz pulled out his Lewis gun.

[Buster Hyman]

Worlds first photo bomb, but it meant something different back in the day...

[Buster Hyman]

Ha, ha! That's not a Bayonet!

[fitliker]

They have secured the elderberry patch and vowed to defend it to the death or after lunch , whichever comes first .

[622]

Look Sir, I know you saw the Indian / Pakistan gate closing on holiday ....but do we really have to do all that?

[Wensleydale]

When will Pierre be back with the white flag?

[NutLoose]

See I told you if you shouted assume the attack position, the froggies would all turn around and show us their backs..

[622]

Sir, they say they have a lovely large wooden horse they would like to present to us!

[NutLoose]

They're saying the fence we put up is made from Swiss trees and they want their posts back.

[Chu Chu]

They say the front begins at the Swiss border, so it must be around here somewhere.

[Chu Chu]

'oskins, are sure the orders say to report to the canton?

Oh wait -- it says "cantonment." My thumb must have been covering the end.

[Buster Hyman]

I fart in your general direction!

[NutLoose]

https://cimg2.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1600x1157/ce3abad1_d619_418c_b823_770096445a83_8116689b4f12f7abbedb3b9 dcfe34a3c01c2cae3_jpeg_43194f82c004d7cbac02a2310781e2ca7ba91 b29.jpg

One more word like that Marcel and I will post you to the front line, you won't like it there fighting hoards of migrants at Calais trying to get across to the UK.

[NutLoose]

How long ago did Pierre wander off to plug in the electric fence?

[MPN11]

*** Surprisingly slow, but at least Calais finally got a mention! I shall call it some time later tomorrow. ***

[Chu Chu]

France expresses its opinion on the Grimm-Hoffman affair.

[Chu Chu]

Anti-clerical troops turn their backs on the Swiss guard.

[Kiltrash]

The PoW's wont just walk out the front gate this time.....
What's that scratching noise?
or
nice to see them using the vaulting horse...

[Kiltrash]

Where did you get these walking sticks from...
The MOD sales book

[Chu Chu]

After three lesser greater fox badgers were killed by vehicular traffic, an international force was deployed to secure a safe road crossing.

[Kiltrash]

i know there are 17 off us and he is blindfolded, tied to a tree with a red marker over his heart. But i think we need more support.

[treadigraph]

Captain Blackadder knew he was completely buggered this time - if only he hadn't listened to Private Baldrick's cunning plan.

[Hydromet]

The troops took a passing interest in the annual Staff Officers' Leapfrog competition.

[Ascend Charlie]

"Cut! Cut! Come on, guys! This is Back to the Future 4, and you have to look a bit more surprised when a De Lorean appears in a flash of light!"

[Cat3508]

We are waiting for the Minister of Defence, he said he would be along at some time to fix the hole!

[Kiltrash]

Yes yes we fully respect your right to protest, but running across and sitting down on Watling Street ? What do you hope to achieve...??

[Kiltrash]

OK so if we turn our backs, when we turn round the superior force will magically dissappear?
By the way ' Mr Ostrich ' what kind of name is that?

[Kiltrash]

So let me get this right Captain. We draw a line in the sand just here and if the enemy dare to cross that, we draw another line in the sand 10 yards further back?
..

[Kiltrash]

" No no you may take our lives but you'll never take our Apples...."

[622]

Sergeant "Right lads...as you can see I have tied the privates privates to the the fence...so he will not leave his post"

[treadigraph]

At the end of the annual Movember charity contest, the men were stunned by the luxuriant 'tache sported by their Colonel's wife - little realising that she'd had one face lift too many.

[Dan Gerous]

At least the queue for the toilets aren't as bad as Glastonbury.

https://cimg2.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1600x1157/ce3abad1_d619_418c_b823_770096445a83_8116689b4f12f7abbedb3b9 dcfe34a3c01c2cae3_jpeg_43194f82c004d7cbac02a2310781e2ca7ba91 b29.jpg

[Chu Chu]

You'd think the Swiss had never seen four people posing for a picture.

[Chu Chu]

Despite the gracious cooperation of the Swiss border force, the green screen concept showed little promise.

[Kiltrash]

Oh how they laughed, using Pierre's helmet as a chamber pot, just before he got dressed for parade..

[Kiltrash]

UK Border Farce, and no thats not a miss spell, show efficient training to the Swiss.

[Kiltrash]

If Carlsberg did POW camps they would house the best dressed turned out prisoners

[Kiltrash]

Ah here comes the dispatch rider from Headquarters with the Generals deliberations,
From Headquarters? What is it...
It's a big building where the brave officers stay, but that's not important right now...

[ShyTorque]

Right! Who stole my chickens?

[Dan Gerous]

Over compensating a bit with the bayonet there Pierre.

[622]

Typical, I ask you to say 'cheese' for the photo....and all the French turn up!

[MPN11]

Rien ne va plus, mes amis.

Les bon oeufs sont …

Treadigraph - 5341, introducing Steve McQueen
Kiltrash - 5381, drawing lines in the sand
Wenleydale - 5347, playing volleyball

En deuxième place …

Dan Geroux - 5385, queueing for the Glasto toilets

Et Le vainqueur …

Ascend Charlie - 5351, joining the Judaean People’s Front {or Back)

A toi, mon ami! Très bien fait!

(We now resume our normal English programming .... pip, pip, pip, peep ... )

[MPN11]

I did send AC a PM advising him of his victory. If nothing is heard by the morning, I suggest Dan Gerous grasps the torch and submits a new image..

[Dan Gerous]

Just in case, Monsewer Geroux will be at work tomorrow, and unable to post a pic.

[Ascend Charlie]

https://cimg1.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1342x1003/pushback3_d99a2dd8eb2e22e525b9a07fb10c5de65790fe40.jpg
Mercy blowthrough, mon army, try this one. Slow response comes from being on the sunny side of the world.

[NutLoose]

On yer marks, get set…..

[Hydromet]

Bloggs hadn't quite got the hang of push-starting.

[NutLoose]

We don’t care where you take it, just get the bloody thing off our cricket pitch.

[NutLoose]

Does this look like a bloody airfield, you want the third island down.

[NutLoose]

That’s one small step for man, one giant leap for a shortarse like you.

[NutLoose]

Ppwwwaaaaarppppp….. ahhh that’s better.

[NutLoose]

You’re flying as the CO’s wingman, where in that conversation did he ever mention the word cockpit to you?

[NutLoose]

Before you step down we need to see your COVID passport.

[Chu Chu]

I told you not to step there. Now look what you've done to the wing.
​​​​​​

[NutLoose]

I told you the walkway was still wet.

[NutLoose]

Hey Bert, it looks like we have a survivor from the Great Marianas Turkey Shoot,

[NutLoose]

Hey Bert, stop scratching your crabs and come over here and watch this crab trying to get in.

[Ascend Charlie]

"(uuugh...urrrgh..)Do you guys wanna stop standing around and help me push this back?"
(Guys standing around): ...and we are relying on THIS pilot to protect us.....

[Kiltrash]

The latest Duxford display of the War in the Pacific takes a liberty with bronzed groundcrew

[Kiltrash]

At Tracy Island the selection process for the Pilot of Thunderbird 1 switches to thinking outside the box...

[Kiltrash]

Dunno why we are fighting and dying over these small insignificant Pacific Islands, in 50 years time with Global Warming they will all be under water anyhow.

[Kiltrash]

Hey Sideshow, see these palm trees? Nice looking ar'nt try,
Thinks...gives me an idea for me haircut...

[Wensleydale]

"Corsair?"

"No mate - I use a conditioner".

[Kiltrash]

Stop winging Bruce, you could have been sent to fly off carriers, on the North Cape run.

[NutLoose]

Sorry mate but you can’t stay, with the COVID restrictions anyone with a known carrier connection is barred from entry.

[NutLoose]

No Sir, this is the natural colour one goes when out in the sun, you must be thinking of Donald Trump, he is an unnatural orange.

[NutLoose]

https://cimg1.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1342x1003/pushback3_d99a2dd8eb2e22e525b9a07fb10c5de65790fe40_aeabaa663 2adafb67d5b86d62c1e4056ec0e98fe.jpg

[NutLoose]

He, Alf, come and look at this guy, I don't know if he is trying to get in or is reanacting the battle of Midway.

[treadigraph]

Aw, shoot, I've dropped the keys down a drain...

[treadigraph]

Is this a Goodyear?

Good year? We've been at war for three years you silly bastard...

[Buster Hyman]

No. You were right. Kiwi's can't fly!

[Buster Hyman]

Oh...sorry. Was that wing straight before I stepped on it?

[Buster Hyman]

Okay, on the volunteer form, I specifically ticked Corsair. So why the hell am I getting in a plane & not a ship?

[treadigraph]

That's one small step for Neil Armstrong and one giant leap for Pete Conrad...

(Thanks to Pete Conrad!)

[NutLoose]

Sorry you are going to have to move it, this patch of real estate has been aquired by Milo Enterprises for the production of palm oil.

[MPN11]

"Bloody Hell, you would think a decent Air Force would provide some steps, or a ladder."

[MPN11]

"It was Boeing's idea, sir. They call it the Man Climbing Assistance Surface. They just put it in the wrong place."

[Buster Hyman]

With this last step, I fully understand why they called him 'Pappy', but I think 'Nappy" might been more useful!!!!

[Ninthace]

I've heard of trying to get a quart into a pint pot but never of t'other way about until now

[cattletruck]

Ground crew sniggering after relocating the black strip further outboard.

[Ninthace]

If you can make that step without your eyes watering, your parachute straps aren't tight enough.

[treadigraph]

If you slip, pull your rip-cord!

Will my chute open in time?

No, but it'll keep you occupied until you hit the ground.

[Chu Chu]

Hoskins took the orders to scramble literally.

[treadigraph]

https://cimg1.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1342x1003/pushback3_d99a2dd8eb2e22e525b9a07fb10c5de65790fe40_aeabaa663 2adafb67d5b86d62c1e4056ec0e98fe.jpg

Well, I did tell you to connect your oxygen first...

[treadigraph]

Sir Edmund Hillary really missed his old climbing partner, Sherpa Tenzing...

[Kiltrash]

Shall we tell him the open door is on the other side....?
Na ..more fun this way...

[Kiltrash]

Pilot...They expect me to kick start this? ?. Wish they would invent the Starter, Mr Coffman...

[fitliker]

Apparently, those Ballet lessons are proving useful now !

[MPN11]

"Four bloody hours painting that ... and 2 minutes of a bloody Pilot to strip it all off again."

[DirtyProp]

Dear Lord by the time I'm strapped in, my squadron will be over Tokyo....

[DirtyProp]

"Bert, should we tell him that this bird is grounded?"

"Nah, let him get in first."

[treadigraph]

If I hear "Layee odl, layee odl layee-oo" once more I'll shove Julie Andrews' gilded halo right up your...

[Dan Gerous]

https://cimg1.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1342x1003/pushback3_d99a2dd8eb2e22e525b9a07fb10c5de65790fe40_aeabaa663 2adafb67d5b86d62c1e4056ec0e98fe.jpg

[Kiltrash]

Could be worse, could be a Aussie pilot...

[Kiltrash]

Don't think the Japs realised what we were building when they supplied the string, wood and canvas, unfortunately means we can only escape one at a time...

[Kiltrash]

Plane Thinks... God hope this is not Hoskins Kiwi Cousin,... my life can now be measured in minutes...

[MPN11]

"Ya know, mate, there are times when I wonder how Hoskins ever got into the Air Force."

[MPN11]

"If Chiefy finds your secret 'NO STEP' stencil you'll be in deep ****, mate."

[Ascend Charlie]

"Hey, guys, was I getting in or getting out? I can't remember.."
"Bloody fighter pilots...."

[Buster Hyman]

Ahh, the good old days. When New Zealand had an Air Force...

[Buster Hyman]

Nutty seemed to recall it was much easier getting in with his high heels on.

[ORAC]

If Hoskins had seen the cheesy grin on Sgt Bloggs’ face he might have stopped stretching back, vainly trying to get his foot on the steps…..

[Kiltrash]

By the time he gets up there the Japanese convoy will be out of range. ..

[Kiltrash]

Shall we let him get in , Settled and strapped in then tell him the missions been scrubbed.....fuel tanker driver shortage..

[SRFred]

One of the little people trying to get into Lemuel Gulliver's aircraft.

[Dan Gerous]

Hey Cruise you short arse, stick to making films with jet planes.

[Ascend Charlie]

Time for a quick call.

Plenty of rib-ticklers in there, but the last one from Dan got me laughing:

Hey Cruise you short arse, stick to making films with jet planes.

He's actually not that small, I gave him a lesson in a Bell 47 back in '03.

Handing over, Dan!

[Dan Gerous]

Thanks AC. Have a go at this one folks.

https://cimg4.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/800x527/prune_7__6c80e72d875ae3081a9274f8eb2785cb9b01bc54.jpg

[treadigraph]

OK, who moved the bloody airfield?

[treadigraph]

Isn't there anywhere around here selling petrol?

[Ninthace]

It will fly again, we just have to set fire to it.

[MPN11]

“Come back here Hoskins, you bastard …”

[MPN11]

Footprints in the sand suggest someone is walking backwards.

[treadigraph]

That's going to cost a Packet to repair...

(I know, it's a C-119...)

[cavuman1]

The Fright of the Phoenix.

- Ed

[TLDNMCL]

"Thought it was a Mirage, boss."

[treadigraph]

When do I get the pint of ice cold Carlsberg?

That's the other desert film Dennis.

Shoot. No Sylivia Syms neither?

Nope.

Wait till I get ahold of my agent...

[Asturias56]

Where do I find Luke Skywalker?

[Chu Chu]

Any landing you can walk away from . . .

[Ninthace]

How long do we have to shift it before the tide comes in?

[MPN11]

“Just write it up as unexpected NLG failure and ignore the navigational and CRM aspects.”

[Chu Chu]

No, no. I said we should go down and pick up some dessert.

[Big Pistons Forever]

Errrrr, I thought you knew there is a pee tube in the back of the airplane......

[treadigraph]

You've found a pack of Camels? Great, I could do with a fag...

[NutLoose]

It can’t be that difficult to modify, the RAF f* ck up perfectly good aeroplanes all the time.

[NutLoose]

When I was on Lightnings…

[NutLoose]

F*ck miles of nothing, who the hell am I going to flash my big firk orf watch at now.

[NutLoose]

I know it’s a hundred degrees plus, but you don’t understand, I’m a pilot, I have to look cool in my big heavy sweat inducing leather flying jacket.

[NutLoose]

You should be able to see Blackpool tower from up here if my navigation is spot on.

[MPN11]

Ryanair were notorious for using remote airports ... advertised as Cities.

[NutLoose]

https://cimg8.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/800x527/image_fdf47fa799b6cfe0ee29f5475bd7b110bde4df20.jpeg

[NutLoose]

Not a problem, if I can find some spice I will be able to fold space and we will be back home in no time.

[NutLoose]

Hey Jimmy Stewart, I thought it was you I saw standing by your aircraft when landing.

[treadigraph]

Weather Ship Charlie is around here somewhere - tide must have gone out.

[MPN11]

“Hey, this RESA really worked. Where’s the Crew Bus?”

[cynicalint]

I thought there was a petrol pump without a queue near here!

[NutLoose]

Bloody German model builder, no sooner were we down and he was out spreading his towels everywhere.

[NutLoose]

I hope we were insured, it’s going to cost a Packet*.

*other aircraft models are available.

[Kiltrash]

The Lost Ark should be around here

[Kiltrash]

Tell the tribesman we're sorry about his tent, but can we use his toilet ?

[Kiltrash]

Jump master. ..Green Light On...Go....Go....Go...

Oh ..they have all gone...

[Kiltrash]

This is No Time To Die, Commander Bond...

[Kiltrash]

I'm just going out, I may be some time....

[Kiltrash]

Lilliputians tie down Gullivers transport to stop him escaping.....obvious init...

[Kiltrash]

Team Europe get stranded in Devils Bunker...

[Kiltrash]

Initial trials of the Fulton Recovery System do not go well....Well it was Hoskins as the Pilot....

[Ascend Charlie]

I was chasing the Womp Rats, see, there's their footprints everywhere!