Caption Competition Mk III

[Kiltrash]

At Duxford the Link trainer finally gets delivered

[treadigraph]

(not a caption - pleased to see this Spitfire is a survivor and is now displayed at the Solent Sky Museum, Southampton)

[Kiltrash]

New obstacle for the Croquet lawn gets delivered...

[Kiltrash]

Keith Moon was later heard to complain ' We're gonna need a bigger swimming pool '

[treadigraph]

After his punkah wallah stormed out in a fit of pique, Heath-Robinson naturally had the perfect solution...

[Kiltrash]

Not a caption....Treaders is that the one we can sit in? If so can I add it to my log book ??

[treadigraph]

Dunno, I've been there in the last 15 years or so but don't recall being able to sit in it... mind you we were there just after opening time (pubs AND the museum!) and were doing some walking along the coast to Hamble so it was probably all a bit of a rush...

Caption: Hold it there boys, (sigh!) now they want it for a museum back home in Blighty...

[Kiltrash]

What Del Boy thought was a Statelitte Dish was in fact a landing aid from Biggin Hill.

[cavuman1]

The runway was exceedingly short, but it was nice and wide.

- Ed

[NutLoose]

You should think yourself lucky dear, I heard some chap at Seletar ended up with a bunch of Sunderland’s dumped on his lawn.

[NutLoose]

It was such a shame to dump them, so I managed to secretly transfer them around the region as “Gate Guardians” and then put about that we had buried them under those teak logs I had ordered, which incidentally we then sold off to some lumber merchant and put the funds raised behind the bars of all the ranks involved and swore them to secrecy. A result don’t you think..

[NutLoose]

If that bloody Admiral across the road can have a canon and balls outside his house, then I can have a Spitfire.

[NutLoose]

This will take a display Spitfire to a whole new level.

[Big Pistons Forever]

Honest Sir we found it just sitting abandoned so we decided to bring it home......

[Big Pistons Forever]

Yup just your typical RAF evolution, 10 officers standing around doing nothing, one more too drunk to stand...and one LAC driving the tractor actual getting the job done !

[Big Pistons Forever]

The Staish hated having to walk all the way across the airfield for his aeroplane......

[Chu Chu]

Hoskins, I only ordered you to measure the height of the terrace.

Of course, Sir. I tried it from the stand, but it turns out the altimeter only reads where the aircraft is.

[Buster Hyman]

The guests couldn't wait to get down there & put a towel on their favorite spot!

[Buster Hyman]

On the Terrace: Bertie...what exactly does 'Gun Harmonisation' mean?

[treadigraph]

Hoskins, the mem-sahib wanted to have canapés on the lawn, not a canopy... and the whole dashed aeroplane...

[Kiltrash]

At the annual Poppy Day Drop in London all went swimming till one of the escorting Spitfires suffered a engine failure, fortunately there was a long wide runway to safely land on in the run up to the big house at the end of tbe road. Later investigations showed the problem started when tbe aircraft lost its propellor

[Kiltrash]

Amazing what you can find when digging on Brocket Hall. ...Later found to be a Insurance scam.

[Hydromet]

Really, Hoskins, your idea for a ski-jump deck sounds quite good, but surely you could have chosen somewhere better for proof of concept testing.

[622]

Walking out onto the balcony "Well Sir, one hell of a party last night!....I don't think the lads did anything to disgrace themselves......oh sh*t !!!"

[622]

Why can't the AOC just have a little pond and a gnome like normal people!

[Buster Hyman]

So, where's this Super Marina I keep hearing about Chumley?

[treadigraph]

Oh, just tell the buggers back in London that we buried it under a runway in Burma...

[Ascend Charlie]

[QUOTE=morton;11278919]https://cimg8.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/995x768/pprune_220815_spitfire_5b9a9aaf019fd205ff8686180dbe7a6b33ca6 f0c.jpg
OK! OK! I will keep the bar open for 2 more hours, just point that thing somewhere else!

[622]

I don't care Doulgas if you do have a blue badge ....you can't park it at the front of the mess!

[622]

All I can say Mr Clarkson is I hope your son Jeremy grows up with more sense than to park a fighter in his front garden as an ornament!

[Buster Hyman]

Ok, its here, but I still can't understand how it'll plough the fields...

[622]

Good news and bad news lads !!
Good news, after this we have another one to do next door...but should be easier as we will have worked out the best way to get it up the slope
Bad News .....He's AOC bomber command

[Kiltrash]

At the August Bank Holiday fairground, the Ducks stood no 'effin chance.

[Kiltrash]

The Jehovas Witness bible bashers did not take too kindly to people not answering the door

[Kiltrash]

Unreleased scene from Skyfall 2. The baddie still did not learn the lesson

[NutLoose]

Sir, you don't need to put a boot full of rudder in when it starts rolling, it's got no prop on it.

[fdr]

"you did ask for close air support, sir...."

[Kiltrash]

Burglar Alarm salesperson decided there was no point going to this household

[NutLoose]

"You know, I don't think it is going to colour coordinate with the building, where's the RAF chappie in charge, Oh there he is"... "I say, you there, do you have one in pink or terracotta?"


..

[NutLoose]

"but where will we play croquet??"

[NutLoose]

I don't think these RAF chappies have played lawn darts before, I must admit, I was a tad curious when they said they would try to bring their own...

[NutLoose]

https://cimg4.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/995x768/image_66ed9377080f04844495047dda200070ce474bdf.png

[NutLoose]

They said we didn't have enough points to qualify for a staff car, but sent this along as compensation.

[Buster Hyman]

"I fart in your general direction!"

[NutLoose]

"Well, it certainly has curb appeal.."

[NutLoose]

"Airmen!!!!......get of the grass!!!!!"

[NutLoose]

They are dumping them all over the place, this is the fifth one I have seen today, one outside the Sgt's and the Airmens messes, one at the Gate, one outside SHQ and one here, it's apparently part of their lordships plan to fool the MOD into believing that the training establishments have more aircraft on their books than we actually have.

[NutLoose]

Right, that's it hooked up to the truck, so how long does it take to wind the rubber band up?

[622]

Its worse than Fly tipping ....this is Fly boy tipping!

[morton]

https://cimg0.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1454x1038/spitfire_at_seletar_0b3b9a1c7b0ac1d2cd89bdd7265788bb40909777 .jpg
Some great answers and well spotted all those who did time in Singapore. The photo is dated 23rd September 1969 and it is 390MU, Seletar removing PK 683 from Changi Officers Mess. Here it is at Seletar, waiting to be packed up for shipment back to the UK. I will be naming names tomorrow (Wednesday).

[NutLoose]

It is just a shame someone decided to put it into the God awful high gloss finish it wears today. I suppose it makes it easier to keep it fresh and it's only a coat of paint.

[Buster Hyman]

HA! Just like a Dalek. Can't manage the stairs...

[treadigraph]

Black and Decker introduce the "Rolls Royce" of hedge trimmers...

[fitliker]

Very impressive spiffey , now let’s see if your short field minimum ground run take offs are as impressive as your short field minimum ground run landings you clever pile it

[Self loading bear]

OK, now we have this one sorted out we will step up to next level:
After lunch we wil do the Beverly and tomorrow the Vulcan.
(see H&N threads)

[NutLoose]

I can't see the problem, push me back, if the Navy can get airborne off a ramp, then so can I.

[NutLoose]

It's Thurday isn't it? Don't worry mat'e, the council recycling bin wagon will be around shortly to take it away.

[Kiltrash]

...and in the cockpit it clearly said " Kilroy was Here " when uncreated in Southampton

[Kiltrash]

So what happened to the Propellor? ? Well the chaps in Greenock needed a replacement for the pitch blower

[cynicalint]

Damn it Darling! I wish you could have built a train-set like everyone else!

[Confusious]

Wait until they've hauled it up the bank before we tell 'em that this isn't 33 Squadran. 33's Flight Lieutenant has been on the phone spitting feathers.

[Kiltrash]

The Mem Sahib is off for a Spa Day, won't she be surprised what I got her for her birthday ...

[Chu Chu]

Well, they were doing it Estonia.

[Chu Chu]

A Spitfire well might be worth ten thousand men. But did you have to tell the Duke of York?

[Kiltrash]

Leave it on the yard she said and the pikey will have it...how was I to know she meant the old washing machine..

[Kiltrash]

While doing his National Service the chap who was to become the Chairman of Shepherd Nemes Brewary was idly looking for names for his products ....I know Old Speckled Hen sounds a cracker

[Kiltrash]

Staish wants the grass pained, again , for a VVIP visit. So gotta move it. Now where did we put the wheels ??

[morton]

Time for the draw and you all made life problematic for me. I did like the reference to Jeremy Clarkson's Lightning – 622 at #12530 - but difficult decisions had to be made. Here we go.

3rd is Nutloose (#12512) with “If that bloody Admiral across the road can have a canon and balls outside his house, then I can have a Spitfire.”

2nd is 622 (#12524) with Walking out onto the balcony "Well Sir, one hell of a party last night!....I don't think the lads did anything to disgrace themselves......oh sh*t !!!"

1st is Buster Hyman (#12519) with the laconic On the Terrace: “Bertie...what exactly does 'Gun Harmonisation' mean?” with an honourable mention to Nutloose (#12488).

Over to you Buster.

[Buster Hyman]

Oh! Cheers Morts! :ok:

Let's have a crack at this one eh!

https://cimg2.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1000x523/army_funny_27_5baa15a579bc49c96172c2cedec23582325644fc.jpg

[NutLoose]

Are you sure this is what dogging is?

[NutLoose]

Don't worry mate, the dogs not fussy..

[NutLoose]

The dogs a bit short sighted, so apologies if when I throw the ball he sinks his teeth into the wrong ones.

[NutLoose]

Don't worry, his bark is worse than his bite, but to be honest mate, those are the least of your worries.

[NutLoose]

Why did you name the dog "humper"?

[NutLoose]

paws for your thoughts?

[treadigraph]

Arrrrgghhhhhhh! New balls please....

[Hydromet]

Nice landing, Hoskins.

[treadigraph]

I've found your contact lens, sir!

[treadigraph]

Woof!

Oooh, I love it when you talk dirty...

[Confusious]

No drugs in there.
Next!

[Kiltrash]

Now you tell me the dog has a foot fetish

[622]

The Hosepipe ban was certainly affecting the Armies training for the up coming swimming championships!

[Kiltrash]

Now you tell me the dog has a foot fetish

[Kiltrash]

Right chaps after you finish you will be qualified to resist Japanese torture having been staked out in the sun, with Chappie having been smeared all over your Crown Jewels.

[Kiltrash]

Dog thinks....woof woof woofety woof...translated as
Now why could i not have been rescued by a nice 87 yr old millionaire and been written into her will as inheriting all her welth. I could have been rich enough to elope with that nice Fifi from next door.

[622]

Happy Birthday Rover.......

[Chu Chu]

You’re safe from a dog if you lie down. Or was that a horse?

[NutLoose]

You'd be quicker using the crawl than the breaststroke, wait, and I'll get my dog to show you

[622]

Hoskins.....when I said roll over and play dead.....I was talking to my dog!

[622]

...and that was the last time that Prvt Smith showed his ID to the dog when challenged ....

[Kiltrash]

Early trials show promise as to medical dogs internally checking people for Prostate Cancer

[Kiltrash]

...and that shows what happens of you jump out a perfectly working aircraft and discover half way down your parachute was packed by Hoskins..

[treadigraph]

https://cimg2.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1000x523/army_funny_27_5baa15a579bc49c96172c2cedec23582325644fc.jpg

[NutLoose]

Now about this time after my dog has brought you under control, I would pat you down, but I can smell the sh*t from here..

[Kiltrash]

Adam Savage had to stand in for ' Buster ' when he objected to the torrent of savage beating he took every week, all in the pursuit of ratings.

[Kiltrash]

Go for a holiday they said, to Cuba they said, to Guantanamo bay they said, all expenses paid they said. Did not tell me it is a one way trip.

[Kiltrash]

Sorry children but as the mealy mouthed Liberals have gone all namby pamby we will have to re think the punishment if you say the dog eat your homework.

[Kiltrash]

Having searched the local hospitals it was fortunate they found a patient already plastered up for the demonstration.

[Confusious]

His passing out parade was not as expected.

[Kiltrash]

....and if you do not vote for Liz, this will be your fate, said Jacobs Rees-Mog

( Sorry everyone I'm on a train to Edinburgh so i'll spare you any more till tomorrow 😊 )

[ShyTorque]

“Help, help…my arm is being eaten by a giant maggot!”

[MPN11]

The spectators all put their money on the Dog ... except Hoskins, of course.

[Wensleydale]

Brian was not happy when his colleagues discovered that he used to be a train driver...

[treadigraph]

The Barbara Woodhouse effect could have unexpected consequences...

[Confusious]

The Barbara Woodhouse effect could have unexpected consequences...
NOT A CAPTAIN
Tready is psychic.:)
​​​​​I literally, just had something like that come to mind.

[treadigraph]

Sorry, I was stuck on transmit...

[Confusious]

German Shepherd Dog getting revenge on multiple humans for his neutering.

[Confusious]

Sir, may I stroke him?
No, you bloody well can't, we've all heard about your tendencies Private.

[Confusious]

As soon as he's finished his breakfast, we'll get set up for his obstacle course training.

[cynicalint]

Dogs being used to train potential England cricketers how to catch a ball.

[cynicalint]

I fart in your general direction!

[cynicalint]

Rover, if you refuse to 'fetch' again, this will happen to you!

[Chu Chu]

Now we know who slept through counter-canine class.

Now we know who's spotted the one on the next rise with the sniper rifle.

[cynicalint]

The invisible Russian who threatened to rape everyone strikes again!

[Ascend Charlie]

The dog was still waiting for Hoskins to properly assume the "Doggy Style" position.

[Chu Chu]

Hoskins relished being the underdog.

[622]

At the Army base Christmas party the ventriloquist soon realised his error in bringing 'wormy' the talking worm to entertain the kids

The dog handler has apologised, but the kids have asked for him to be booked for next year!

[NutLoose]

And now gentlemen, this RAF Electrician will see the world from the other end.... go get boy.

[NutLoose]

https://cimg0.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1000x523/image_3c9be6f13aff4cf0ff283a354bb0ed3f968482e2.png

[NutLoose]

And as you can see we caught this chap in the WAAF block, still with his hand up inside some old bag.

[Cornish Jack]

" ... NEXT .../ ! !!

[Kiltrash]

Downwards firing ejector seat.??...well that really is thinking outside the box Hoskins.

[Kiltrash]

...and here we see Hoskins demonstrate what can go wrong when you do not adhere to " Mind the Gap " when disembarking the train....

( been there done that and felt a right ****. Fortunately before the invention of camera phones. .)

[treadigraph]

"So it's a film... three words... third word two syllables..."

"Woof!"

"Kaiser asks if it's The Great Escape?"

[Kiltrash]

Now in the movies the hero always dodges the bullet and escapes without a hair out of place. Real life however is a different matter...
or
Anyone want to admit to downing Superman ??

[Kiltrash]

Dammit it Treaders I was about to say..
What the German guards found when they moved the vaulting horse.

[Chu Chu]

With a recalcitrant Russia finally prostrate at the world’s feet, the only question was which of the choice bits would be torn off first.

[SASless]

Carl....if you are going to sandbag....the middle of the parade ground is not the place!

[fitliker]

The plan always works until something bites you on the arse , again .

[fitliker]

The new chew toy makes the best noises when bitten

[Kiltrash]

Neither the Bird man of Alcatraz, nor the Colditz glider made it successfully out the guards compound.

[622]

No one had the heart to tell Hoskins that the 'invisibilty cloak' he bought at the local market didn't actually work!

[Confusious]

As you all know we're fully inclusive here in the army, but if anyone 'identifies' so to speak then please let me know cos he hates the smell of fish.

[Kiltrash]

In France the Climate Change activist popped his member in the 18th green, however Pierre Hoskins ( age 47) found out the hard way the greenkeeper was about to stick the flag in a conveniently placed alternative hole.

[Kiltrash]

With his last dying breath Tonto was heard to say " White man's Iron Horse passed this way "

[Kiltrash]

Never before seen tape of John Noakes and Shep's last assignment surfaces

[treadigraph]

Rin Tin Tin, I'm your biggest fan and I want to have your puppies...

[treadigraph]

Never before seen tape of John Noakes and Shep's last assignment surfaces

Go down Shep!

[NutLoose]

Ok Sandpit survival 101, that's him spread at 2, 5, 7 and 10 o'clock, the head incidentally is always pointing to 12, now we ram a steel pole down between his butt cheeks and we have our desert sundial.

[NutLoose]

Now normally we would use two people to carry out a search, my colleague would cover him with his weapon while I would roll his clothing to check for hidden weapons or ammunition, unfortunately as you can see, I am alone today, therefore several swift hard kicks to the bollox will render him combat ineffective for a short period of time while I carry out my search.......... I will now demonstrate.

[NutLoose]

https://cimg8.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1000x523/image_3c9be6f13aff4cf0ff283a354bb0ed3f968482e2_c38da117c88d4 5279f5f39d84326c95467d8b2a2.png

[Wensleydale]

"I wish you wouldn't use the command, 'Ball! Fetch!'"

[Confusious]

During their first (and last) display at Crufts the Defence Animal Training Regiment were keen to show off Rocky jumping through multiple rings.

[Ascend Charlie]

Hoskins was looking a bit "flat", so Bouncer was ready to pump him up.

[Kiltrash]

Dog....What's that twit doing???
Guard...I think it's the breast stroke, pity about the flash drought.

[Kiltrash]

At the baseball pitch Hoskins was told by the coach to ' cover all the bases '

[Kiltrash]

North, South, East and West ...it's all the same to him.

[Chu Chu]

When you said you were putting me down for an Alsatian meal, I thought you meant beer and sauerkraut.

[622]

White and male?......of course there is still a recruitment channel still open you.....Dog Toy!

[Confusious]

Go ahead and spin Hoskins again to see who's next.

[Wensleydale]

And finally remember: if you are stopped by a military policeman with a dog, you show your ID to the dog!

[Hydromet]

Why does that MP have a dog with him?

He likes hanging out with intellectuals.

[treadigraph]

Yes officer, that's the man who bit me...

(Man jailed for biting police dog (https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2022/08/19/man-jailed-biting-police-dog/)...)

[Confusious]

Oh **** Rocky, I said jump not rump!

[morton]

OK, for a small fee I told you I would help with your stop & search demonstration.

You told me that I had to assume the position and then I would be frisked.

Why are there so many paying customers watching and did I hear you right when you said your dog’s name was Fritz because it sounded very much like Frisk!

[Kiltrash]

Hoskins, your 5 years too early. The planning permission for iFly has only just gone in...

[NutLoose]

Ladies and gentlemen, unfortunately the dog track hare has gone U/S but we have managed to attach Scroggins to the cable, so racing will resume shortly…

Scroggins… WTF?…

[NutLoose]

Please do not worry Gentlemen, all our dogs are trained in the skills of Halal.

[Kiltrash]

Him? A terrorist? ? Oh no a much worse crime, he's a white male applicant to the RAF.

[Kiltrash]

In this country this is how we deal with striking train* Drivers ...
* substitute your own personal choice of striker

[Kiltrash]

Flogging was seen as far too barbaric to be countenanced in this enlightened country.

[treadigraph]

Royal Mail Training for Postal Worker Recruits Day 2...

[Kiltrash]

At Hogwarts, the pupils were encouraged to waggle their wands and get him out this predicament

[Chu Chu]

Man Helps Dog Bite Victim.

[NutLoose]

https://cimg7.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1000x523/image_d6d8810a96c2b919c5f5a076232fc8e3768e72b0.png


I think I will have a lie down over here, wake me when the results are in.

[Kiltrash]

NO for the third and LAST time , i don't want re homing with Paul O'Grady. ...said the man.

[Kiltrash]

NO I don't want to be your Bitch...

[Kiltrash]

Hoskins, no we're all out of barrels, you'll have to take it like a man...

[Kiltrash]

Some countries allow open air day light Dogging....whatever that is?

[Kiltrash]

Well yes I picked him up at Battersea, there's more if you want however you'll need him to be castrated, this is how they do it, ...said Rover.

[Big Pistons Forever]

The director of the reenactment of "Dog Day Afternoon " elected to deviate from the script....

[Big Pistons Forever]

I told him dating the RSM's daughter was a very very bad idea

[Big Pistons Forever]

He should have took the 250 Press Ups..........

[fdr]

"We at Pedigree take testing of your dogs choice seriously, for wet, dry or wet 'n dry... 69 different flavours".

[Buster Hyman]

Time to call this one. Well over 100 posts! Just goes to show that this crowd seem to enjoy Privates & Nuts!!!

3rd with the Honourable Recycling award...
I fart in your general direction!
2nd with the Wimbledon Award...
Arrrrgghhhhhhh! New balls please....
And our winner with the Spoken from Experience award...
The dog was still waiting for Hoskins to properly assume the "Doggy Style" position.

:D

[treadigraph]

Just goes to show that this crowd seem to enjoy Privates & Nuts!!!


One after the fact...

Sergeant: Private Hazell, get up, he didn't hurt you...

Dog thinks: Hazel? That didn't smell like squirrel sh!t to me..."

[Ascend Charlie]

Thanks Buster, but I am out of pix right now, so we will have an Open House...

[Confusious]

Try this one.
https://cimg0.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/960x573/aerogallo_4_faf8e3080f5da92c0bb0a63b18ddd7df6b248be0.jpg

[Wensleydale]

"State Chicken".

[cynicalint]

Pilot who wanted to identify as a 'Bon Oeuf' chose the wrong gender aircraft from which to be reborn!

[treadigraph]

Clucking Bell...

[treadigraph]

Hello? AVM Duguid? That replacement type for re-equipping the Red Arrows... I think I've found it...

[Chu Chu]

Sriracha Express.

[Self loading bear]

Too chicken to fly.

[Self loading bear]

Chicken Wings goes virtual reality.
Roost air is about to take off.

[cavuman1]

What's the difference between a rooster and an attorney (barrister)?
A rooster clucks defiance....

Chauffeur, Roller, Hasty Exit

- Ed

[Hydromet]

"Yes, that's Colonel Sanders. Likes to personalise his aircraft just a little too much, don't you think?"

[Chu Chu]

Anyone can put a cock in a cockpit. But if you can put a cockpit in a cock, you might have something.

[ShyTorque]

“Who said Scramble? Leave my kids out of this!”

[Ascend Charlie]

Mr Buck Bacaw cried fowl when the CAA refused the registration G-CHKN.

[treadigraph]

For his Dawn to Dusk entry, Foghorn Leghorn had so far visited Crowland, Henstridge, Eggesford, Fowlmere and Henlow...

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

French Air Force new national insignia: may as well tell it like it is.

[Big Pistons Forever]

The Russian Air Force is getting desperate

[Big Pistons Forever]

What on earth were the Ukrainians thinking ?

Well to drive home the point the Russians don’t have Air Superiority we fly this over their HQ !

[Big Pistons Forever]

Well obviously it is Kentucky Flight Chicken !

[fdr]

"... then they said it's good luck to have a bird poop on your head, and then I said.... "

[Self loading bear]

Certification went well until it chickened out for the bird strike test.

[Kiltrash]

Radical redesign for the Max to ensure safe ground clearance for the engines ....well it's safer than MCAS

[Kiltrash]

At the shooting event the Clay Pigeon fights back

[Kiltrash]

In the morning the latest Banksy was revealed on the wall of 42 Acadia Gardens.....Later sold for £5m buyer collects.

[treadigraph]

If Bernard Matthews did aeroplanes...

[treadigraph]

Scruggs, I'm afraid the Air Ministry considers your new Wonderplane to be a complete Fustercluck...

[Wensleydale]

The Sun reports New Aircraft for 43 Squadron.

[NutLoose]

let's get the clucking bell out of here.

[NutLoose]

RAF caught up in diversity issues, their new training aircraft was clearly seen to be a rooster and no hens had been ordered.

[Ascend Charlie]

"The Woke Brigade has censored my Flight Manual, so there's no mention of a Fuel C0ck"

[Buster Hyman]

The wake turbulence really fowls the air…

[Buster Hyman]

No, I said I want to check in for my flight!

[Buster Hyman]

Better feather the engine

[Self loading bear]

The only birdie not under par

[Confusious]

This was a tough-un, so calling it early.

cynicalint has hatched a cracker, so gets the golden egg:
Pilot who wanted to identify as a 'Bon Oeuf' chose the wrong gender aircraft from which to be reborn!

And with a very clever topical cracker our runner up is:
NutLoose
RAF caught up in diversity issues, their new training aircraft was clearly seen to be a rooster and no hens had been ordered.

Congratulations cynicalint, over to you.

[treadigraph]

French Air Force new national insignia: may as well tell it like it is.
I thought that one won hands up... :}

[Confusious]

I thought that one won hands up... :}
Yep, liked that one too Treaders, but when you gotta call, you gotta call.

[cynicalint]

Thank you! Confucius thinks I won Hands Down!
Crack the shell of the CST on this one....


https://cimg6.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1123x643/untitled_a5d1219674b079b238cd8913f536c7de070f0cf9.png

[treadigraph]

I'm looking forward to the singletons opposition passes...

[treadigraph]

Ah, the Jones Bros Circus...

[treadigraph]

Red Three, late into the turn as usual...

[Ascend Charlie]

Who said the 6-monthly sim check couldn't be fun?

The Rare Darrows doing their bad weather show.

[Wensleydale]

"Wish I didn't have a hangover".

[Kiltrash]

Operator...No No the idea is YOU pay ME to fly that.

[Kiltrash]

Talk to me Goose...No clot that was the last picture

[Kiltrash]

Don't you think this is a bit dangerous?? I mean flying over the moors at Balmoral after 12 August..

[Kiltrash]

The British Astronaut training programme seek a replacement Centrifuge

[Kiltrash]

Whatdoyoumean BA have cancelled our flight??

[Kiltrash]

Red 5 why have you changed your reg from XX714 to G-COCK

[Kiltrash]

Well this was the only way we could let the travelling engineer fly to the show

[Kiltrash]

Strip away all the 'fluff' and this us what really goes on

[Dan Gerous]

Get on the Reds ground crew and you get to fly in the back. Well whoop de fecking doo!


https://cimg6.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1123x643/untitled_a5d1219674b079b238cd8913f536c7de070f0cf9.png

[MPN11]

"Hey, this HOTAS arrangement really works well."

[treadigraph]

I thought it was known as The Circus. This is more like a ruddy funfair...

[Buster Hyman]

@%$#ing holding patterns!

[Buster Hyman]

Surely we can start the Ukrainian pilot training a little further into the program?

[Buster Hyman]

Red 1: We've got a bogey on our tail!
Blue 5: ...racist!

[ORAC]

The First USN Blue Angels/Red Arrows exchange pilot struggled to keep during his first familiarisation flight…

[SLXOwft]

If any one asks, you are to tell them. 'The full safety case has been signed off and the blues have received the appropriate training.'

[Kiltrash]

Next time let's try something less dangerous. ...like punting along the River in Cambridge

'cause that's where I am today 😁

[NutLoose]

Look, I see Red 4 is over in the House of Fun diversifying with.....

[NutLoose]

Is that Red 4 over there trying to get his balls into the clowns mouth?

[NutLoose]

And then there were four.............

[SLXOwft]

At least the tabloids can't say our team building event had nothing to do with our jobs.

[SLXOwft]

One of the blues gets a taste of being a member of the two-winged master race.

[NutLoose]

https://cimg7.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune.org-vbulletin/1123x643/image_efb562500ad96fd471f3b95f138babf817bcc44f.png

[NutLoose]

And it's neck to neck going into the start of the season, but we have a faller already,
Red 8 has pulled up at the water jump, but the rest of the runners are over and heading
down the straight.
But wait what's this, Red 4's horse appears to be trying to mount one
of the outsiders and has pulled up early, the stewards will be looking at this incident after
the race.
On we go and the pack is closing up, there seems to be some jostling at the front,
Red 5 appears to be in a tussel with Red 1 and looks to be out of it leaving Red 1 out in
front, but Red 1 can see his chances of advancing further rapidly disappearing.
It's going to be a close run race to the line and it could be anyone of the surviving
7 runners season..

[MPN11]

“Reds … Break Break Break … GO.”

[Dan Gerous]

Red 3 spots an open bar and he's off.

[Kiltrash]

OK like to see Thunderbird 1 try this...without a G suit

[Kiltrash]

Just off camera the photographer managed to miss BoJo's latest goodbye tour..

[Confusious]

Had he opened his eyes Declan Donnelly may have enjoyed his experience day with the Red Arrows.

[cavuman1]

Pull back - cows get smaller.
Pull further back - cows get bigger!

- Ed

[Confusious]

All the rumours of RAF Waddington and it turned out to be Blackpool.