Caption competition

[Danny42C]

"Now, if I pot that Red with a bit of backspin .......!"

[Danny42C]

"What happened to your Lance, man ?" ...... "Well, Corporal-Major, I left it outside the tent last night, and the white ants .....!"

[Danny42C]

"The Air Traffic Fusiliers hadn't enough propelling Chinagraphs to go round - so they're just using the refills !"


EDIT: "You're becoming obsessed" ! Stop it !

[andytug]

"Remember, the first one to see the enemy has to shout Bang or they don't get awarded the kill!"

[NutLoose]

http://www.pprune.org/attachments/military-aviation/3249d1507189643-caption-competition-160610-z-ch590-967.jpg



"I'm sorry to say you are our front line defence and although it may be an onerous task, the mother of all turds has been discovered in trap three, just remember your training men....Stab break flush...stab break flush."

[NutLoose]

"When they told you at the CIO that if you joined the Airforce you would get lots of pole time, you didn't seriously think they meant flying did you?"

[Hydromet]

The NZ Army maintain the tradition of performing a Haka before engaging the enemy, no matter what the situation.

[brokenlink]

Following on from Nutloose...........

No madam, I do not know the words to "YMCA" or the dance moves!

[Buster Hyman]

So...where are these reported 'hatches'?

[Buster Hyman]

The Flat Fanny Pack Brigade swing into action...

[SASless]

Riot Training was going to bring the Role Players to Tears....one way or another!

[JAVELINBOY]

Who had the idea to use Woodall Spa as a riot training ground?

[Danny42C]

"The XVth Morris Dancers on Parade ..................?"

[Buster Hyman]

The Mosul Line Dancing Society reinstated their Winter Ball.

[MPN11]

<not a Caption>

Judging this lot is a daunting task already! Many excellent contributions up-Thread ... responsibility weighs heavily on MPN11 :(

[c52]

Each man practises saying: "Lord Sugar, I am determined to win this process. I am 110% your man. To me, opposition is simply a chance to demonstrate my superiority." Then, aloud: "Burgers! Come and buy our superior burgers!"

[Cows getting bigger]

"You dancin'?"

"You asking?"

[andytug]

"You get outta step...... that's a paddlin'..."

[Crash alot]

The protection force for President Trumps golf clubs was a little heavy handed, perhaps inspired by spanish police?

[NutLoose]

"And remember folks, when you have positioned it up between her legs, deduct the wet area away from the dry, then pass the inside leg measurement details back to the station tailor, she may kick, but you have protection."



preparing for the incoming

[squeaker]

Having nearly blinded himself last time, Hank was taking no chances as he prepared to erect the family frame tent.

[Danny42C]

........................................THIS IS NOT A CAPTION


MPN11 (#44712),

Ah, "Wer die Wahl hat, hat die Qual " ................

We await Judgment with bated breath !

Danny.

[Ascend Charlie]

These Lightsabres are more like Darksabres to me! But I suppose my stormtrooper suit isn't quite Tattooine Pattern either...

[Danny42C]

"No - it's Two Purl. One Plain !"

[andytug]

"Sir..... when you said we were going out clubbing I was rather hoping it would involve alcohol and women......."

[DirtyProp]

Wal Mart staff getting ready for the late Christmas shoppers.

[DirtyProp]

These latest war video games sure are realistic...

[MPN11]

<<< Not a Caption >>>

I will probably try to judge tomorrow (Sunday) while I'm sober. I have twice strayed from Aviation themes, which is naughty of me, so probably time to get back to where we should be!!

BTW, nobody has picked up on my first thought yet. If they find that, they could be the winner :)

[andytug]

The RAF Regiment Formation Line Dancing Team prepares for another competition...

[Big Pistons Forever]

Note: Rank insignia is USAF

“Awww, the Air Force guys are sure cute when they pretend to be soldiers”

[FinelyChopped]

Woe betide whoever had nicked all the skateboards.

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

When the Base PX announced that new supplies of hotdogs and donuts had arrived, and that it was "first come, first served", the MP's readied themselves for some "queue management".

[squeaker]

Ok, has anyone seen the carrots?

[MPN11]

< Not a Caption >

I'm compiling the short list already, so be quick ;)

[MPN11]

OK, let’s see where we ended up [at least, in my mind!].

Firstly, there was no bonus for getting close to my first thought, which was “Behind You!!” ;)

The Topical Joke Award is equally, and justifiably, shared by:

Penny Washers - “Security arrangements for next year's Conservative Party Conference will be toughened up. The extra smoke, however, might provoke the PM's cough.”
Danny42C - “Viva Catalonia!”
JAVELIN BOY - “Who had the idea to use Woodall Spa as a riot training ground?”

Honourable Mentions go to:
Buster Hyman - “The Mosul Line Dancing Society reinstated their Winter Ball.”
andytug - ”Sir..... when you said we were going out clubbing I was rather hoping it would involve alcohol and women......."
squeaker - “Ok, has anyone seen the carrots?”

And now the Winners, in reverse order.

In Third Place, "You dancin'?"

"You asking?””

The Runner-Up - "Remember, the first one to see the enemy has to shout Bang or they don't get awarded the kill!"

And the new, albeit temporary, holder of the Coffman Starter Trophy is …

"Extreme Snooker will never catch on you know"

A delightfully 'off the wall' contribution! Applause for the winner, please, and over to you Nutloose. I shall pour myself a glass of wine to celebrate ;)

[Big Pistons Forever]

Applause for the winner,

Since it was not me, I don't think so !

Sigh...... Oh very well I will allude to the fact that the winning comment had some small amount of merit.

Actually since Nutty was Air Force and not an esteemed member of the Senior Service like myself, I should revise my opinion to well done, you sir exceeded my expectations.:p

[Danny42C]

Bah, foiled again ! - but beaten by a better man !

[MPN11]

Bah, foiled again ! - but beaten by a better man !On this occasion, quantity didn't beat quality ;)

[NutLoose]

Cool... Ok I will get a picture sorted out :)

Never better Danny, simply lucky :)

[Buster Hyman]

Sympathy votes carry a lot of weight.....:p:p:p

[SASless]

Sympathy Vote? Nay Mate....the Fix was in!:D

[NutLoose]

You're only jealous Buster because my cheque reached him first... :E

Ok on with the next one...

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2017/05/24/18/40C0157700000578-4536602-image-a-26_1495646868842.jpg

[MPN11]

"I'd keep an eye on that bloke behind you, Constable ... those ISIS scum like using swords."

[Wensleydale]

"So you earn more than the two of us and get overtime?"

[MPN11]

This 9mm v. 5.56mm debate would last for nearly 2 hours.

[Danny42C]

"I cannot see the Signal !"

[Danny42C]

"Watch the birdie !"

[Danny42C]

"Quis Custodiet ipsos Custodes ?"

[Ascend Charlie]

No, I am not a traffic cop, and I don't know where the Village People concert is tonight.

[DirtyProp]

Look buddy, mine's bigger than yours so you better follow MY orders. Got it?

[MPN11]

"Ministry of Defence? Down there on the left, mate. Big thing - you can't mis it."

[Danny42C]

"No, Marylou - it's his scabbard !"

[Danny42C]

"Here's lookin' at you, kid !"

[Danny42C]

"Up, Guards, and at 'em !"


("Quantity has a quality all its own").

[MPN11]

("Quantity has a quality all its own").If you say so ...

:ok: :D

[MPN11]

"My wife has some handcuffs like that, but hers are pink."

[Buster Hyman]

Nah go on, it's a right larf! Tell him, there's a Fiver on the ground behind him & then watch him try & bend over! Hilarious!

[Buster Hyman]

So...when was his thread ban lifted Officer?

[Buster Hyman]

"Excuse me. Is this England?"

(Name the Film)

[JAVELINBOY]

If your looking for a bit of action boys get yourselves up to Clapham Common at twilight.

[NutLoose]

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2017/05/24/18/40C0157700000578-4536602-image-a-26_1495646868842.jpg

[ShyTorque]

"Right, you two - I'm arrestin' you for 'avin' loaded weapons in a public place!"

[NutLoose]

"So this isn't Tidworth then?...B*gger, I told you we should have turned right at Pewsey."


Sorry coudn't resist

[c52]

"That's right, boys. I am as old as you two together, as heavy as you two together, and I can run faster than either of you carrying the other."

[Buster Hyman]

Honestly. We just want Boris' autograph.

[MPN11]

"err ... s'scuse me ... is there somewhere near here where we can park our Warrior?"

[NutLoose]

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2017/05/24/18/40C0157700000578-4536602-image-a-26_1495646868842.jpg

[Wander00]

Is that right, are you here to arrest us if we shoot anyone

[Wander00]

Got this message from No 10 - if you see a guy called Boris, kneecap him

[MPN11]

"Just a tip, lads. Around here it's best not to cough ... bit of a sensitive issue at the moment."

[c52]

"The chap in fancy dress is 'ere to guard 'Er Majesty. I'm guarding 'im. You're guarding me, and that noise you just 'eard above was the Royal Air Force guarding you."

[MPN11]

Not PC ....

"You see that Japanese tourist? My Dad was in Burma in the big one. If she moves, don't hesitate, OK?"

[PingDit]

"So officer, you've only ever actually fired it on the range then..."

or

"So how do you fire it right-handed wearing that eye patch?"

[MPN11]

"Why aren't you wearing a pointed helmet, mate?"

"'Cos my sarnies are in my leg-pouch."

[NutLoose]

"So we are looking for a short Eurasian woman, black hair, wearing grey shoes and trousers, a light coloured top with a motif on it and carrying a grey bag?.... Blimey, she could be anywhere mate!"..

Sorry 2

[Wensleydale]

"My Inspector says that they only shoot when they see the whites of your eyes".

[Wensleydale]

Someone nicked his horse when he wasn't looking!

[MPN11]

"When I'm older, the Corporal of Horse says I might have a gun too."

[MPN11]

"Move along, lads, you're spoiling the Stable and Secure image."

[DirtyProp]

Where can I get a fancy helmet like that chap in red?

[Big Pistons Forever]

From the Police Officer

Oh thank god you made it, I look like this because I am desperate for a huge ***** !

[SASless]

Tis the same the world over....the guy with the fancy Uniform and Long Saber gets the Bird!

[Big Pistons Forever]

"The chap in fancy dress is 'ere to guard 'Er Majesty. I'm guarding 'im. You're guarding me, and that noise you just 'eard above was the Royal Air Force guarding you."

............................................................ ...........................

:D

[MPN11]

"Hampstead Heath, lads? You need a Number 24 bus, just up there, one every 10 minutes ..."

[Cows getting bigger]

OK Rambo, shoot anyone and I'll arrest you. :ugh:

[andytug]

"You've got no ammo either? That best be a real sword then....."

[NutLoose]

"Don't worry it's multi cam, it makes us blend in, I bet you can hardly see us"

[Buster Hyman]

Hey Officer. We're on a hike for our selection course. Can you point us in the direction of the Brecon Beacons please?

[treadigraph]

Wot d'yer mean by "yer mate look like an Action Man...?

-----------------

So if we see anybody with white hair and a scraggy beard answering to the name "Jeremy", we're to shoot him, right? Right...

[Buster Hyman]

No, we're not soliciting for BDSM!

[SASless]

See here Bill....we are the from the combat army....Pretty Boy over there with the Blonde Pony Tail and Fairy Boots...he's in the the ceremonial army.

[Pontius Navigator]

"Hey Grandad, wots with the shades? Trying to look cool?"

"Watch it kids, I'll have you for playing soldiers"

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

Mate, we're looking for a bloke in funny boots, red jacket, pointy tin hat, and, oh yeah, he's got a bloody great sword. You seen any one like that?

[Penny Washers]

Do you reckon that bloke behind us with the kinky boots and a pony tail has got a real lightsabre?

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

He's there to stop anyone gettin' in. We're here to stop anyone gettin' out!

[MPN11]

Passing pedestrian is puzzled by use of Oriental women to augment H Cav guard force.

[Dan Gerous]

We don't need sun gogs to look cool mate, and as for the cuffs, well when were finished shooting, there's no need for them.

[NutLoose]

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2017/05/24/18/40C0157700000578-4536602-image-a-26_1495646868842.jpg

"It is you isn't it, Tony off the Bill"

[FinelyChopped]

You haven't seen John Cleese prancing off to the Ministry, have you?

[Danny42C]

"Don't you think that one of us is rather de trop ?"

[Danny42C]

"All right, Dad - I'll take over now !"

[MPN11]

"Well, Constable, I did apply for the Military Police but they said I were too clever."

[NutLoose]

"Are you sure you didn't used to host who wants to be a millionare?, my nan just loved that programme"

[MPN11]

"We are taught always to keep both hands on our weapon, but I see you only have a little one."

[Buster Hyman]

"Yes Son, I may be old, but that's just the point....I got to be old!"

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

Morning Constable, what are you up to today?
My orders, son, are to patrol this gate and be on the lookout for any groups dressed in a paramilitary fashion and carrying automatic weapons. If observed, I am to assume they are hostile, and to terminate any possible threat with extreme prejudice. Now do you mind moving back towards the road, as I don't want to get any blood on the chap to my left's white trousers.

[Danny42C]

"C'est magnifique, mais ce n'est pas la gare !"

[MPN11]

<<< not a caption >>>

Very subtle, Danny42C :)

[MPN11]

"Well, Constable, we brought our helmets because there's a desperate shortage of Public Lavatories in Whitehall."

[MPN11]

"Stuff that, lads, it's a real man's life in the Ministry of Defence Guard Service."

[Penny Washers]

Have you noticed? Each of those automatic weapons is pointed at the feet of the next man along.

If they are all going to shoot each other in the foot, then perhaps the armoured boots worn by the cavalryman make some sense.

[MPN11]

Have you noticed? Each of those automatic weapons is pointed at the feet of the next man along.

If they are all going to shoot each other in the foot, then perhaps the armoured boots worn by the cavalryman make some sense.

Perfectly safe ... Shooting in the Foot is done at MoD, just across the road and down a few hundred yards ;)

[Wensleydale]

"C'est magnifique, mais ce n'est pas la gare !"


...or as the copper said "C'est magnifique, mais ce n'est pas la glare !".

[MPN11]

<groan>


+ 3 letters

[MPN11]

"Any idea how long this alert goes on for, mate?"

"No idea. It's been a couple of days now. I'll give Nutty a call."

;)

[SATCOS WHIPPING BOY]

"These shades have built-in Ipod speakers, his boots conceal a pair of Bose cubes and his sword is actually a DAB aerial. It wouldn't be good getting caught listening to music."

[MPN11]

"Respirator, spare magazines, additional ammo, radio ... what in yours?"

"Cheese and Pickle."

[Wensleydale]

"Strangely, they stopped teaching Morse to us as well"!

[NutLoose]

Ok I will score it tomorrow, so last calls while you have a chance :)

[Buster Hyman]

Oi! This is me & Bert's corner. You two Gigolo's go & find your own corner!

[NutLoose]

That's cleared that up about you then Buster.... Does it pay the rent? :p

[Buster Hyman]

Ask yo Momma....

[MPN11]

"Yo-Yo Ma? I think she's over-rated, personally."

[NutLoose]

Surely in your case Buster you mean Pater...... :E

Ok, without a fanfare and all of that, the winners of the coverted Coffman Starter trophy for a brief period of time are ...............

1st place is C52 with the classic

"The chap in fancy dress is 'ere to guard 'Er Majesty. I'm guarding 'im. You're guarding me, and that noise you just 'eard above was the Royal Air Force guarding you."

2nd place again falls to C52 with

"That's right, boys. I am as old as you two together, as heavy as you two together, and I can run faster than either of you carrying the other."

and finally a worthy 3rd place and equally tied, Big pistons, Javboy and MP11 with

From the Police Officer

Oh thank god you made it, I look like this because I am desperate for a huge ***** !
_________

If your looking for a bit of action boys get yourselves up to Clapham Common at twilight.

and

"I'd keep an eye on that bloke behind you, Constable ... those ISIS scum like using swords."


And with that I hand the reins over to C52.. :D:D:D

however I would just like to add I am mightly impressed with the apparent wealth of knowledge on here as to the seedier locations in London to visit :E

[MPN11]

I have to say that c52 looked to be the winner from the moment he posted that! Well done, Sir :ok:

(PS: I used Google to find the bus route)

[c52]

I am delighted, of course. Thank you very much.

I have a frantic evening before travelling all day tomorrow. I doubt I'll be able to put up the next picture before tomorrow evening.

[MPN11]

We {well, I) will be patient ... quality matters ;)

[NutLoose]

I (we) will too, you deserve it.

[Danny42C]

We will contain our impatience !

[Buster Hyman]

https://m.popkey.co/3fe450/pv8bk_f-maxage-0_s-200x150.gif

[c52]

I guess these are South Koreans but there will be no penalty for anyone assuming they're from the North, or any other part of the world.

https://i.pinimg.com/736x/3f/7f/6e/3f7f6efeef8c75ab6cb7df43d2001828--korean-air-rare-photos.jpg

[CONSO]

These stealth fighter prototypes are amazing- next week we get the real ones !! ;)

[Buster Hyman]

38th Parallel...37th Parallel...38th Parallel...37th Parallel...

[CONSO]

Our glorius leader has just named this firing squad formation after Sir Cuelar- on my mark pull the trigger to celebrate !:cool:

[Wensleydale]

"Clear land - Two ahead."

[Wensleydale]

"Its fun at the moment, but wait until Glorious Leader shouts 'PULL!'".

[JAVELINBOY]

When the Glorious Leader gets on we will experience new heights

[JAVELINBOY]

What goes around comes around even here in the North

[MPN11]

Next week it will be Exercise 13B ... 'Turning Left'

[Wensleydale]

Once we've mastered this then we get onto the Swing Role trainer.

[Wensleydale]

The Glorious Leader's computer experts have hacked the imperialistic West's defence computers and we have built the centre of a JTIDS network!

[Dan Gerous]

Maverick: "I'll throttle back, he'll fly right by us"
Goose: What!

[Dan Gerous]

Guy looking back, "Stay in formation, and cut the Korean chit chat"

[NutLoose]

https://i.pinimg.com/736x/3f/7f/6e/3f7f6efeef8c75ab6cb7df43d2001828--korean-air-rare-photos.jpg



"Ze American dogs vill not know vhat hit them, now all ve need to do is lure them down into ze circuit."

[NutLoose]

"Ze are catching us Heer Capitan"

"Deploy countermeasures... Tear up ze bacofoil and deploy ze chaff, take off your trouzers and throw ze flares overboard"

[NutLoose]

"Qvik, putz anozher coin in zer slott"

[NutLoose]

" I have you in my sights..... F*cky F*cky....looooong time...

[Buster Hyman]

*Not a caption*

Nutty...is that your N. Korean "accent"? Needs work... ;P

[Danny42C]

"If we keep going round in ever-decreasing circles, shall we vanish up our own ..........?"

[treadigraph]

The guys behind have taken their hats off - what do they know that we don't?

[andrewmcharlton]

We must work to extend the range to change the pig dog imperialist infidels.

[S'land]

Is the Glorious Leader sure that this is a Link Trainer?

[andytug]

"Fox 2.......Splash one!"

[andytug]

"Break right! Break right!"

"Sir, why don't we break left instead?"

**BANG!!! *

<silence>

"Anyone else wish to question the Dear Leader's wisdom?"

[Wander00]

Always the same on the Korean peninsular, just like a bl@@dy roundabout

[NutLoose]

"Look, Hung lo is flwing soolo.. nooo navigwator... who cawwy his bags?"

[Penny Washers]

Mekons in the Mekong.

[Dan Gerous]

We so much better than Western Pig Dogs. We put pirots in drone, they no do that.

[Wensleydale]

Once we have been round three times then we can wear aircrew eagles over our rank tabs!

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

Nav to Pilot, keep turning, I think we are losing them!

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

Too close for missiles, switching to guns!

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

Debate would continue over the years as to whether it was actually Captain Smi Lee Face and his observer, or Major Cran Kee Look who fired the fatal shots that downed the famed "Korean Red Baron".

[SASless]

This Wagon Wheel defense works a treat....until the end of the ride when everyone goes down!

[Buster Hyman]

Is this the way to Guam?
It's a round-about way, yes...

[Danny42C]

"Here we go gathering nuts in may ......!"

[Danny42C]

"Stop the world, I want to get off !"

[MPN11]

Disney Corporation expands into Global Defence Training Marketplace.

[Buster Hyman]

Global SIM shortage solved!

[Danny42C]

"It's the simulator for our new circular runway !"

[Buster Hyman]

It's no good, I can't maneuver!
Stay on target.
We're too close!
Stay on target!
Loosen up!

[Pontius Navigator]

Beware Sun in Sun

[JAVELINBOY]

You two no laff when see next ride is 'Wall of Death' and it no have any motorbikes

[Pontius Navigator]

Great Leader solves problem of lack of fuel for air to air gunnery practice and Gee training

[Big Pistons Forever]

Think bubble over head of guy looking away

Hmmm when I signed up for Air Force flight training I was expecting rather more......

[Pontius Navigator]

Red Circle display team demonstrates close formation orbit display though the rest of the routine was strictly limited.

[Big Pistons Forever]

Yes Minister, I absolutely think you should purchase that “ Flight Training Device “ you saw on your sponsored South Korean Defence Cooperation visit. Think of all the money the RAF could save !

[MPN11]

"Hey, Kim, this formation flying is soooo easy."

[Penny Washers]

Quick - find the P-tube. We'll wipe those silly grins off their faces!

[Lafyar Cokov]

While No 1 and No 2 were in perfect formation, He-Too Hi was living up to his name again..

[Danny42C]

...................................................NOT A CAPTION

Lafya Cockov's last recalls the glorious spoof played on the local radio of San Francisco (or Los Angeles?) years ago. A Chinese cargo heavy jet had landed "hot and high", and gone off the end that afternoon. Aircraft bent, no casualties.

At about 10 to the six-o'clock News, a caller rang the newsdesk: he had the names of the crew, would they be interested ? ... Yes, they would !

Solemnly he dictated:

Pilot 4: Sum Ting Wong !
Pilot 3: Wi Tu Hi !
Pilot 2: Ho Li Kow !
Capt: Doh Bang Ow !

News Editor didn't spot it, "BREAKING NEWS" said poor girl with mic, and out on air it went ! Seems all traffic in town was stopped for a while as drivers with car radio on were rolling about laughing !

Fact (the broadcast): I've heard a recording.

[CONSO]

My imperfect recollection is that one name broadcast was wot ta fuk - but i could be wrong

[DirtyProp]

Bloadswold calling Danny boy....bloadswold calling DannyBoy....

[DirtyProp]

The newest FlighSafety Inc facility in N.K. featuring state-of-the-art equipment.

[DirtyProp]

Mole light luddel! Mole light luddel!

[Wensleydale]

The capitalistic imperials call it "quidditch".

[MPN11]

Hey, Li, how you spell 'dagga dagga dagga'?

[MPN11]

"I exhausted, going round and round"
"Me too ... do we try Straight and Level again?"
"You want get shot?"

[SATCOS WHIPPING BOY]

<NOT A CAPTION>
Link ref Danny42C news broadcast. KTVU prank: Outrage as news station 'names' the pilots with racially insensitive monikers | Daily Mail Online (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2362486/KTVU-prank-Outrage-news-station-names-pilots-racially-insensitive-monikers.html)


<CAPTION>
Ewald and Trace circumnavigate the globe, in fancy dress, all for chariddy.

[Danny42C]

"It's called "Follow my Great Leader" all the way - to where we started !"

[MPN11]

Air Traffic Control at No. 826 Flying Training School was regarded as a cushy posting.

[Wensleydale]

Who requested a flyby of the Ghost Train?

[Wensleydale]

And now we go to practise deck landings on the Hook a Duck.

[Pontius Navigator]

https://i.pinimg.com/736x/3f/7f/6e/3f7f6efeef8c75ab6cb7df43d2001828--korean-air-rare-photos.jpg"

Now we have them, bit more height, pull hard, get in side, then we have them.

[Danny42C]

"First pair go low, second pair go high ... No, we've got it ALL WRONG, Wong ...!"

[Danny42C]

People's Republic version of the Edmund's Trainer ?


(that dates me).

[CONSO]

Check six ...Check six ...Hey I'm SIX !! :O

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

"Three's in hot!"
"Whaa....!!"

[DirtyProp]

Will Ryanair count this as type rating?

[DirtyProp]

This B737 sim sure is realistic!
But I can't find the autopilot....

[ValMORNA]

"Keep your head down, Wong, single-seat instructor coming in low behind. May give you the 'chop'."

[MPN11]

"No problem, we just sit here in the Holding Pattern until Great c52 makes a decision."

[c52]

Since you ask, the winner is Dan Gerous:

We so much better than Western Pig Dogs. We put pirots in drone, they no do that.

Runners Up

Danny 42C

"It's the simulator for our new circular runway !"

MPN11

Air Traffic Control at No. 826 Flying Training School was regarded as a cushy posting.


The CST is on its way, but it may take a long time to get there on account of a circular route. My advice would be to go to a theme park near you to collect it.

[Dan Gerous]

Thanks c52, wasn't expecting that.


Have a go at this one.


https://s1.postimg.org/1qm4cpvl67/pprune_01.jpg (https://postimages.org/)

[NutLoose]

He is signalling turn right Captain.

[NutLoose]

https://s1.postimg.org/1qm4cpvl67/pprune_01.jpg


The weight of the new pilots big firk off watch was found to be effecting the Carriers lateral trim.


,,

[Wander00]

If it moves, salute it, if it doesn't, then paint it white

[Wander00]

It is that new anti-radiation paint, very confusing

[MPN11]

The winner of the "Great American Ice-Cream Sculpture" competition was giddy with success.

[MPN11]

Jack was confused. Why would they need Arctic camouflage in the tropics?

[NutLoose]

"'I'm singing just off Maine, I'm singing just of Maine, What a glorious feelin' I'm happy again............"

[JAVELINBOY]

Lieutenant Heisenberg hit on the idea of using the deck as a surfing simulator whilst heading for Hawi

[cattletruck]

These new foam planes can be launched by hand.

[NutLoose]

"Have you seen it? It is a barrel about this high with a small hole in the side, some scum has nicked it out of the Wardroom"

[NutLoose]

" I say Sir, flag signal coming in from the Carrier"
" Nope, forget that, It's just the Exec mincing down the deck"

[MPN11]

Lt Smith had special permission to bring his Stealth Great Dane on board.

[NutLoose]

"For the love of God, will someone get their ass down on deck and tell the new Batsman that it is normal to do a wave off from the rear of the ships deck."

[Buster Hyman]

"Call the ball!"
"Waving off. I can see two for some reason"

[Buster Hyman]

No Mr. Bond, I expect you to fly!

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

"It's fun to stay at the Y...M...C..A.....c'mon everybody, join in......it's fun to stay at the........"

[NutLoose]

"So is this where the sea angling contest is taking place?"

"Noo sir, that's on the other side of the deck"

[NutLoose]

"And this is where the catapult should have been"

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

Now I want the all black ones lined up staring from here. When that's done, we'll draw lots to find out who has first go at Skyhawk chequers!

[Buster Hyman]

RAN Augmented Reality simulator...bringing back the good old days!

[Buster Hyman]

A bit left....bit more...back a little...THERE! STOP! Got it!
I'm really tired of this. I wish we could find a working antenna for the TV but it's unlikely that we'd find one out here at sea!

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

So if we draw an imaginary line right about here, you can do all the takeoffs on that side, and all the landings can be on this side.

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

What the hell? I swear I left numbers 1 through 24 right here this morning.

[ShyTorque]

The imaginary aircraft were bad enough, but the CPO's invisible friend was becoming something of a worry.

[Wander00]

Persil washes whiter

[ValMORNA]

'Never mind the quality, feel the width.'

[SATCOS WHIPPING BOY]

https://s1.postimg.org/1qm4cpvl67/pprune_01.jpg


I'm a little teapot short and stout.
Here's my handle, here's my spout.

[NutLoose]

"Can you C me?"

[andytug]

"The XO said we'd go faster if we leant into the turn , sir?"

[andytug]

***theme from Hawaii 5-0***

[DirtyProp]

Join the Navy they said....you'll use fancy, state-of-the-art equipment, they said....

[gileraguy]

"You put your right hand in, you put your right hand out. You put your right hand in and you shake it all about..."

USN Solo Hokey Pokey Champion shows he's got the right stuff...

[Prangster]

Anyone seen a basketball? I was shooting hoops until the damn ship rolled

[andytug]

"OK, joke's over, Photoshop my broom back! "

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

Cmdr Hiram J Linebacker III shows he's still "got it" by "hanging 10" off the bow of his carrier.

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

RNZAF delivery of A4's en-route from Airfix factory. They will still have to paint and apply the decals themselves. In a gesture of goodwill, Airfix threw in a pre-finished pilot figure in "realistic mess bull-sh*tting" action pose.

[Wensleydale]

"When I raise my hand to the left, the ship lists left, and when I raise the right...."

[Wander00]

I know, but walking along a straight line was the old test for deciding if you were drunk

[Wensleydale]

Been drinking the ship's cocoa again....


"As some day it may happen that a victim must be found
I've got a little list - I've got a little list..."

[Danny42C]

"Thar she blows !"

[MPN11]

"Mad Jack" McSkipper always led from the front.

[cattletruck]

What shall we do with a drunken sailor,
What shall we do with a drunken sailor,
What shall we do with a drunken sailor,
Earl-eye in the morning.

Put him in an A4 and... Way! Hey! up she rises,
Put him in an A4 and... Way! Hey! up she rises,
Put him in an A4 and... Way! Hey! up she rises,
Earl-eye in the morning.

[[email protected]]

The real future aircraft carrier capability for the RN post budget cuts.........

[Traffic_Is_Er_Was]

Lt Elmer W Humdinger II, Ship Sanitation Officer, indulges his private fantasy as Blue Angel Lead Solo.

[NutLoose]

Typical, wait for hours and then three buses come along..

[NutLoose]

https://s1.postimg.org/1qm4cpvl67/pprune_01.jpg


"TAXI!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

[MPN11]

Dave just couldn't wait for someone to invent "Strictly Sailors Come Dancing"