Caption Competition Mk II

[Kiltrash]

Early radio system, microphone ok but a loudspeaker. ..wish they would invent headphones

[Kiltrash]

This air to air photography will never take off I mean why would enthusiastic people ( let's call them Spotters) take snaps and ask for Comments and Criticism. ..

[Buster Hyman]

"Pity those poor Sods in the trenches" they said, "Join the RAC instead & get instant access to the Officers Club" they said....bastards!

[MPN11]

Looking in the mirror, Hoskins was concerned about the lack of pilots.

[Kiltrash]

…...and it the emergency oxygen bottle fails remember to manually inflate 'George' before passing out

[Penny Washers]

Once the ram-air experiments are complete, Farnborough will turn its attention to area rule design.

[Kiltrash]

Pilot to Nav," Look I know you are upset because I have been giving your wife a good old fashioned seeing to as you have 'problems' in that area, but PLEASE give me a course back to base.
Nav to Pilot, that's ok as I have the only parachute in the aircraft, bye….

[Kiltrash]

Pilot to gunner..."Focker coming in at 3 o'clock
Gunner to Pilot,... 3 o'clock, but its only 10 to 12....

[Kiltrash]

1917 Observer to Pilot... erm sir I think that was one of ours, but don't worry I have pulled the circuit breaker on the gun cam
Pilot damm this flight simulator is good....

[Kiltrash]

Pilot thinks...I really must take up a less dangerous career. ..I know a Security guard in the British Museum, statue division.

[Kiltrash]

Rolls Royce marry their 2 divisions, Aircraft and Posh cars.... they both need chauffeur, so the type training is simple

[c52]

He'll be really angry when he discovers someone's put a dirty great fire extinguisher in front of his picnic basket.

[c52]

Until all aircraft are rebuilt with 2 m between crew members, pilots are responsible for their own navigation.

[Wensleydale]

Michael Caine receives training in the "How to shake Your head while Firing Machine Guns" simulator before filming the in cockpit combat sequences for "The Battle of Britain".

[Chu Chu]

I might have seen this caption before somewhere, but:

Maintenance report -- mixture not adjusted correctly.
Engineering note -- mixture control refitted in more prominent position.

[NutLoose]

I won’t be a moment, I’m just firing off a snotogram to HQ.

[Surplus]

Entries are slowing down, so I'll call it:

Second place and a Mention in Dispatches:

Originally Posted by treadigraph

We found Brown Windsor soup to be the ideal multi-purpose fluid. In turn it is used to fuel and lubricate the engines, then de-ice essential parts of the airframe and finally refuel the pilot. He then can recycle it back into the fuel tank. A sort of Brownian motion.

But the winner, keeping it short and to the point:

Originally Posted by NutLoose

Not a sniff of a Jerry all day.

Take it away Nutty.

[Kiltrash]

Sunday morning caption while waiting for picture ( also the full Scottish being made )

Picture published of Buster sticking needles in Nutty avatar

[NutLoose]

Blimey, thank you, I will treasure the trophy, OK on with the next one..

[Hydromet]

"Who called the cook a bastard?"

"Who called the bastard a cook?"