Caption Competition Mk III

[treadigraph]

The weight of the Captain's wrist watch was to affect the crew's pose for the camera quite significantly...

[Wensleydale]

..and the flight attendants practise their new safety brief which includes the hand signals for "in case another engine has fallen off".

[Chu Chu]

Asked to describe the state of the airline, the crew mimes circling the drain (off camera to the right).

[622]

With the airline closed during the lockdown.....crews forced to become ride height gauges for theme parks.

[treadigraph]

The Captain demonstrates how he used to pick up ladies' 'kerchiefs with a wingtip at aishows - the rest of the crew demonstrate that he was nothing special...

[MPN11]

“Gentlemen prefer blondes” ... the Vietnamese version.

[MPN11]

First Officer “20-Minuter” Hoskins was spoilt for choice, as they all looked the same to him. And they all knew how he got his nickname.

[NutLoose]

Vietjet introduce the ho chi mingers.....

[treadigraph]

Illustration from The Ladyboy Book of Aircrew...

[ShyTorque]

Fourth girl back “No, Agnes, cross your legs....we’re only supposed to say “Wheeeeh”, NOT actually do one!”

[c52]

"...and in the unlikely event of a landing in the jungle, at least the cabin crew is appropriately attired."

[cattletruck]

There is one stewardess recruitment test for the pretty ones, and another for the rest.

[Kiltrash]

In Asian countries the bicycle is the main means of transport.
( Cummon we have all pretended to be airplanes when cycling to school, even you at the back )

[Kiltrash]

The Viajet training department show in the queue for the loo there are certain standards to hold.

[Kiltrash]

Engineers need to change a tyre, so to speed things up to maintain departure schedule the crew help hold up the body of the plane.

[Kiltrash]

Copilot ...Why have we 8 hostie instead of the regulation 4 sir ?
Pilot. ..'cause they are only half sized
or
Pilot ...'cause they are all called Neehi.

[NutLoose]

Yuu there, Jerewy Clarkesonman, we no slopes, we no understand were you get that idea...

[NutLoose]

And this is called a flying buttress

[Dan Gerous]

Part of the crews pre-flight check list, was a list to Port.

[c52]

OK, ladies, regulations say your hair has to come down to the hem of your shorts, so let's have you bending over backwards to demonstrate your compliance.