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Caption Competition Mk II

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Old 29th Mar 2020, 08:37
  #2061 (permalink)  
c52
 
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"I'm got this great idea, your majesty. Now we're legalising skywriting, why don't we write STAY INDOORS all over the skies of our great cities?"
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 08:37
  #2062 (permalink)  
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"What time do you call this, Boris? Don't you know the clocks went on last night?"
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 08:53
  #2063 (permalink)  
 
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"I don't know what the fuss is! The Grand Old Duke of York had 10,000 men while Andrew just had one teenage girl". (Allegedly).
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 09:27
  #2064 (permalink)  
 
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I have used Anus Horribli, but as everyone has overloaded with toilet paper it won't be that in future.
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 09:27
  #2065 (permalink)  
 
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Hello, Mr Corbyn how are you.
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 09:29
  #2066 (permalink)  
 
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Yes, your Majesty, it will last until the day after Father's day, it will stop all the cards I get from all my kids as Royal Mail could not cope.
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 09:30
  #2067 (permalink)  
 
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Social distancing means you can't see all your family for months, your Majesty.
OK, so what is the down side to this Virus.
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 09:51
  #2068 (permalink)  
 
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Philip, its that nice man from Go Compare, he says he can offer you a great deal on car insurance
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 09:53
  #2069 (permalink)  
 
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Please pass on to Charles that the oldest woman in the UK is 112 today and that I intend to out live her
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 09:56
  #2070 (permalink)  
 
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( Angrily ) Ah PM what do you want now?...
Ah Ma'am, given this state of emergency could you please squeeze in one last Investiture? My OBE for having 'Got Brexit Done'
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 14:48
  #2071 (permalink)  
 
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( very angrily ) look what the eff now PM ?

ah yes ma'am I was wondering now you have a heir and several spares please could I borrow one of your spare hairs? My hairdresser refuses to come out to me and I need a blonde wig.
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 15:13
  #2072 (permalink)  
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ER: Prime minister, have you found a way yet to stop Bercow getting a knighthood?

IM: Yes Your Majesty, it seems he's Tweeted a video of himself exercising at home with his kids... oh, the pathos!

ER: Excellent! Otherwise I'd have bally well chopped his head off!
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 15:23
  #2073 (permalink)  
 
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Does this mean I don't have to have any State dinners for a while
Yes, your majesty
Yippee I wanted to binge watch The Crown.
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 15:26
  #2074 (permalink)  
 
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So Prime Minister, does Philip need to go on any of those driving excursions to take someone out.
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 17:00
  #2075 (permalink)  
 
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B: Ma’am, it seems Sweden are being fairly relaxed about this whole Flu thing.

Q: Remind me, please, how vulnerable are annoying teenage girls to COVID-19?
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 17:59
  #2076 (permalink)  
 
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I say PM jolly quiet in the air over Windsor these days ,I am getting a good nights sleep. When this I over would you expand the Heathrow curfew from 13.00 - 12.00 hours?
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 19:50
  #2077 (permalink)  
 
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Stay Safe!




Rory and Jeanette have a cosy fire side chat in the latest Gold Blend advert
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 19:50
  #2078 (permalink)  
 
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So PM, how are your children...........
Sorry Your majesty I have only been able to contact the first 50 and they are doing ok.
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 19:52
  #2079 (permalink)  
 
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So PM, you can't come and visit me, I was going to send Philip to pick you up..
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Old 29th Mar 2020, 19:55
  #2080 (permalink)  
 
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Off camera Philip thinks his wife is having an affair

Off camera Carrie knows her fiancé is having an affair
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