Caption Competition Mk II

[Kiltrash]

We found him hiding out at the North Pole
North Pole? Where's the snow?
Global warming...
Brought the Pole back as evidence.

[Kiltrash]

After a outburst on set, Tom Cruise goes off in the huff. See you after Christmas, got my other job to do.

[Wensleydale]

Look what NORAD finally managed to shoot down after many years of trying.

[Ascend Charlie]

"The Sergeant is from 'Elf'n'Safety, but does he have to wear that suit and go Ho Ho Ho all the bluddy time.??"

[Kiltrash]

In Aldershot Echo company give Hoskins a Escort to his grotto in the shopping centre.

[Kiltrash]

General to Captain off camera....
I understand camouflage to blend in with the woods but carrying a flag and hi viz strips on the back packs?
Captain thinks....silly old fool does not see anything wrong with Santa being there. ...

[Kiltrash]

Having had one too many Mulled Wine on Christmas Eve night, Santa needed a Escort back from the Police Station when he was released from the Drunk Tank.

[ShyTorque]

“No you idiots, for your field exercise I said get yourselves over to STANTA!”

[NutLoose]

Ok and our next delivery is to a Peruvian drug lord..


https://nypost.com/2020/12/16/peruvi...for-drug-raid/

[622]

Things starting to slow down, so will call this around mid day tomorrow!
.....last orders!!!

[Chu Chu]

Much to the platoon leader's chagrin, the sergeant's enlistment contract contained a Santa clause.

[Kiltrash]

We found him in the Old Holly Roger, Crying into his Sam Smiths sobbing as last orders was called about Tier 3 from tonight.
" I tell you Christmas is cancelled boo hoo.. ."

[Kiltrash]

As the troop returned from having the Covid -19 jab from the MO, they noticed Hoskins was having a severe reaction

[NutLoose]

How the hell was I to know the station had a centralised heating plant and only one chimney.

[NutLoose]

It’s Snow White and the bloody seven dwarfs, can’t you get anything right Hoskins.

[NutLoose]

Are you sure we should be handing out E’s in the grotto?

[NutLoose]

And remember Santa, when you meet Hoskins, there is no need to sprinkle fairy dust over him, someone’s already beat you to it in that respect.

[NutLoose]

The Colonel isn’t impressed Santa, have you ever seen someone who’s been covered in liquid reindeer sh*t from 7000 feet.

[Kiltrash]

Bloody Army, yomp ing here, yomp ing there, bloody yomp ing everywhere.
Should have joined the Air Force

[Kiltrash]

In Aberdeen the Army providing protection on Trumps golf course. Mr President to make it easier for you we can move the hole closer to you.