Go Back  PPRuNe Forums > Aircrew Forums > Military Aviation
Reload this Page >

Caption competition

Military Aviation A forum for the professionals who fly military hardware. Also for the backroom boys and girls who support the flying and maintain the equipment, and without whom nothing would ever leave the ground. All armies, navies and air forces of the world equally welcome here.

Caption competition

Old 3rd Sep 2018, 13:48
  #50041 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: QLD - where drivers are yet to realise that the left lane goes to their destination too.
Posts: 2,364
Were she to lean her head back and open her mouth, she too would achieve axial flow.
Traffic_Is_Er_Was is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 14:13
  #50042 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: cardiff
Posts: 568
auditions for lead actress on the next mission:impossible are underway

Ttfn
ivor toolbox is online now  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 16:10
  #50043 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: "Deplorable but happy as a drunken Monkey!
Age: 72
Posts: 16,612
Taking the Wife for a day out took on a whole new meaning!
SASless is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 17:44
  #50044 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Hanging off the end of a thread
Posts: 18,212
It was a difficult decision for Betty, let go with one hand and reach into her handbag to get her mirror to allow her to check her hair or get her lipstick out and attempt to refresh it without a mirror.
NutLoose is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 17:56
  #50045 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Often in Jersey, but mainly in the past.
Age: 76
Posts: 5,994
Lucy was desperate to date the First Officer. Little did she know he was the Captain’s wife.
MPN11 is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 17:58
  #50046 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: UK
Posts: 4,935


Betty entered a competition where the last to let go would win the aircraft , however the organizers discovered she had practiced at the Harrods Black Friday sale
Kiltrash is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 18:07
  #50047 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: UK
Posts: 4,935
When the PM checks the tail mounted camera as the PF reports sluggish controls he is quite surprised

or

Having chained herself to the aircraft the Mothers for Justice demonstrator is distraught when her bluff is called
Kiltrash is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 18:10
  #50048 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: UK
Posts: 4,935
Originally Posted by NutLoose View Post
TAMPAX.......Now with wings.
Or Red Bull gives you wings
Kiltrash is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 18:34
  #50049 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: UK
Posts: 4,935
Shamelessly lifted from Friday Jokes

A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, 'Can you tell me how long it'll
take to fly from San Francisco to New York City ?'

The agent replies, 'Just a minute.'

'Thank you,' the blonde says, and hangs up.
Kiltrash is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 19:13
  #50050 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Hanging off the end of a thread
Posts: 18,212
"Don't worry lad, tha's seen all those UUU tube films were t' cowl comes off, so I have put t' wife out theea t' stop it 'appening on my flight"
NutLoose is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 19:17
  #50051 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Often in Jersey, but mainly in the past.
Age: 76
Posts: 5,994
In the midst of this scenario, she still thought “Does my bum look big in this?”
MPN11 is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 19:21
  #50052 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Often in Jersey, but mainly in the past.
Age: 76
Posts: 5,994
There was a young lady from Dorking
Who thought she would try that ‘wing walking’
Her first brave attempt
Led to rapid descent
And the mess that she made they're still shovelling..
MPN11 is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 19:53
  #50053 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Cincinnati, Ohio
Posts: 377
Talking Judge Not - Lest Thee Be Judged!


Fat Girl Not Included

This was a particularly difficult sequence to judge: each entry was even more amusing than its predecessor.

First, one acknowledges the kind beckoning of Kiltrash, who kindly gave his invitation to post a shot of something that the crew here assembled might find amusing. Clear Skies, plenty of fuel and altitude, and a cornucopia of ideas for you, Good Sir!

I can only wish that my flesh-and-blood friends could be as funny as my interwebby pilot friends! Here we found entries sans pareil by the usual suspects: Nutloose, SATCOS WHIPPING BOY, Dan Gerous, SASless, andytug, Wensleydale, c52, Danny42C, Kiltrash, and MPN11, who receives extra credit for his attempt to rhyme “shoveling” with “walking” in his poetic and ultra-amusing late entry. Each of you could have a career as a standup comedian should you so choose! Yet...

Having been reduced to laughter-induced tears and subsequent quadruplegia, I turned to my loverly Bride, Christine, to place the Laurel of Victory upon the Victor’s substantial cranium. (One must be, by nature, possessed of an immense cerebral vault to come up with such commedia del arte.) Though she bypassed several potentially misogynistic entries which I found highly guffawable - I find that the female of the species is misandrous - plus I should like to sleep in the bed tonight, I concurred with her award.

Thusly, without further adieu, with “Looking out of the cabin window, Geoffrey quietly smiled that his cunning plan to avoid paying the new carry on baggage charge seemed to be working.” Courtesy of ShyTorque.

Each of you shall receive a Coffman Starter Cartridge for your superb contributions, but The Bashful Torsional One gets the Hallowed Trophy, on its way, strapped with innumerable rounds of black nasty to a GEnX monster, which sucks, squeezes, bangs, and blows, which is where my sick mind was going with a caption...

Oh! Is that my Uber ride already?

- Ed

Last edited by cavuman1; 3rd Sep 2018 at 20:05. Reason: Spacing
cavuman1 is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 20:12
  #50054 (permalink)  

Avoid imitations
 
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Wandering the FIR and cyberspace often at highly unsociable times
Posts: 12,893
Cavuman, many thanks, winning was totally unexpected.
Sorry, I hadn't even prepared a speech...I'd like to thank...etc, etc.
That was a cracking image, by the way, ideal for the caption contest job!

However, having recently suffered a total PC meltdown I've had to have my HDD wiped and system rebuilt from scratch so I'm still in the process of recovering lost photos. I suspect I might have posted this one before but it must have been a while back. Hopefully it will display properly:

ShyTorque is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 20:20
  #50055 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: UK
Posts: 4,935
Sarge screams...WHERE'S YOUR BLOODY EAR DEFENDERS!!!
Kiltrash is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 20:34
  #50056 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: UK
Posts: 4,935
The First Armored Division decide to fire the Stig when he writes a book so uncovering his identity

or

Hank muses about the events that led to this situation

or

Hank realizes a Weggie at boarding school was not as bad after all
Kiltrash is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 20:47
  #50057 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Often in Jersey, but mainly in the past.
Age: 76
Posts: 5,994
Not a Caption. Glad to have made the short-list. I shall be absent for the next week of so, as the warmth of Valletta beckons. Up to 32ºC today, IIRC, so much cooling wine will be needed! Dinner table booked already

However, I shall depart with ...

"Goodbye, Chris Evans."
MPN11 is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 20:48
  #50058 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Somewhere flat
Age: 64
Posts: 4,295
Hank slowly realised why the advert in the recruiting office had said that the Army was looking for men of the right calibre.
Wensleydale is online now  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 20:59
  #50059 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: France
Age: 76
Posts: 6,365
MPN11 - not a caption either - thank God. A guy more up his own @rse does not exist - IMHO. Good riddance, less likely to listen to Virgin Radio than Beeb R2
Wander00 is offline  
Old 3rd Sep 2018, 21:02
  #50060 (permalink)  
Gnome de PPRuNe
 
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Too close to Croydon for comfort
Age: 56
Posts: 7,188
Originally Posted by MPN11 View Post
Not a Caption. Glad to have made the short-list. I shall be absent for the next week of so, as the warmth of Valletta beckons. Up to 32ºC today, IIRC, so much cooling wine will be needed! Dinner table booked already

However, I shall depart with ...

"Good riddance, Chris Evans."
Fixed that for you! Have a good hol...!

ffoulkes-Brown of the Foreign Office had begun to realise that negotiating with the French scallop fishermen might involve rather more than gun-boat diplomacy...
treadigraph is online now  

Thread Tools
Search this Thread

Contact Us - Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service - Do Not Sell My Personal Information -

Copyright © 2018 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.