I Wish I Hadn't Said That ...
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Like HtoC, felt this thread needed a retention bonus ....No! Don't start on that here, pleeeze!
Spams are not the only ones to struggle with place names - it can even happen to our very own 2-winged master race....No! Don't start on that here, pleeeze!
Many years ago, before the last ice-age, I hauled the proverbial cargo plane full of the proverbial rubber dog-**** not out of HK but across the endless nothing out northern Canada. The copilot, who had not dried behind the ears, tried to report our position overhead Kapuskasing but became so tongue-tangled that, even after 5 attempts, the closest he could get was 'Kapiskaping'. Reply from Centre was:
'Roger, Ascot, reroute via Chibougamou to Narssasuaq'.
Me - 'Centre, please explain reason for reroute'.
Centre - 'Not much traffic at present. Just want to hear you guys try to pronounce the waypoints.
Spams are not the only ones to struggle with place names - it can even happen to our very own 2-winged master race....No! Don't start on that here, pleeeze!
Many years ago, before the last ice-age, I hauled the proverbial cargo plane full of the proverbial rubber dog-**** not out of HK but across the endless nothing out northern Canada. The copilot, who had not dried behind the ears, tried to report our position overhead Kapuskasing but became so tongue-tangled that, even after 5 attempts, the closest he could get was 'Kapiskaping'. Reply from Centre was:
'Roger, Ascot, reroute via Chibougamou to Narssasuaq'.
Me - 'Centre, please explain reason for reroute'.
Centre - 'Not much traffic at present. Just want to hear you guys try to pronounce the waypoints.
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Droptank,
My dad had the same problem when he used to pole his North Star south of the border to places like Poughkeepsie.
Dutch controllers around the Maastricht area used to love(?!) to hear RAFAIR OCU crews trying to handle "s'Hertogenbosch" as a reporting point, too.
[This message has been edited by Thud_and_Blunder (edited 23 February 2001).]
My dad had the same problem when he used to pole his North Star south of the border to places like Poughkeepsie.
Dutch controllers around the Maastricht area used to love(?!) to hear RAFAIR OCU crews trying to handle "s'Hertogenbosch" as a reporting point, too.
[This message has been edited by Thud_and_Blunder (edited 23 February 2001).]
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Ratty
Good to see the Cymraig on here from time to time. Ever flown to Bangkok? (or should I say krungthepmahanakhonamornrattanakosinmahintarayudhthayamahadi kokpohpnoparatrajathaneebureeronudomrajniwesmahasatamamompim arnawaltarnsatitsakatattiyavisanukramprasit)
Try getting your tongue round that at the end of a 12 hour flight...
Good to see the Cymraig on here from time to time. Ever flown to Bangkok? (or should I say krungthepmahanakhonamornrattanakosinmahintarayudhthayamahadi kokpohpnoparatrajathaneebureeronudomrajniwesmahasatamamompim arnawaltarnsatitsakatattiyavisanukramprasit)
Try getting your tongue round that at the end of a 12 hour flight...
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This probably belongs in 'I wish I hadn't typed that'.
A friend of mine was showing his dear old mum the web for the first time, yes you only have to type a word, and you can get hundreds of things to look at. He typed, he looked, and his mum got plenty to look at, only trouble was he had mis-typed, and left the C off canal! oops!
A friend of mine was showing his dear old mum the web for the first time, yes you only have to type a word, and you can get hundreds of things to look at. He typed, he looked, and his mum got plenty to look at, only trouble was he had mis-typed, and left the C off canal! oops!
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Last year went to a place in Hungary. All the way there I use the ICAO desig for the airfield, but once in Hungarian airspace the crew said that I needed to have at least one shot. I gave it my best and met the Hungarians wiping the the tears from their eyes after we landed.
Well how do you pronounce
'szentkiralyszabadja' then?
Well how do you pronounce
'szentkiralyszabadja' then?
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After putting Albert to bed for the night at Souda Bay (US Navy present), conversation turns to the security of the fine beast.
"We can use seals", remarks the Capt
During the death-defying coach trip to the Hotel Grott, Co pipes up from flying-induced slumber:
"I didn't realise that the US Navy had Special Forces on Crete, they'd be pretty pissed-off having to guard Albert all night"
!!!!!!!!!
And yes, it was a good night
"We can use seals", remarks the Capt
During the death-defying coach trip to the Hotel Grott, Co pipes up from flying-induced slumber:
"I didn't realise that the US Navy had Special Forces on Crete, they'd be pretty pissed-off having to guard Albert all night"
!!!!!!!!!
And yes, it was a good night
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Great story from Flt International this week!
A US Air flt to Fort Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727. The irate female ground controller lashed out at the US Air crew screaming,
'US Air 2771, where are you going? I told you to turn right on the Charlie taxiway; you turned right on Delta! Stop right there! I know its difficult to tell the difference between C's and D's but get it right!'
The controller continued to tongue lash the crew and became semi-hysterical.
'You've screwed everything up - it'll take forever to sort this out. Stay right there and don't move until I tell you to. You can expect progressive taxi instructions in about half an hour and I want you to go exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tell you. You got that US Air 2771?'
A terrible silence ensued for several seconds until an unknown pilot broke the silence and asked,
'Wasn't I married to you once?'
A US Air flt to Fort Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727. The irate female ground controller lashed out at the US Air crew screaming,
'US Air 2771, where are you going? I told you to turn right on the Charlie taxiway; you turned right on Delta! Stop right there! I know its difficult to tell the difference between C's and D's but get it right!'
The controller continued to tongue lash the crew and became semi-hysterical.
'You've screwed everything up - it'll take forever to sort this out. Stay right there and don't move until I tell you to. You can expect progressive taxi instructions in about half an hour and I want you to go exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tell you. You got that US Air 2771?'
A terrible silence ensued for several seconds until an unknown pilot broke the silence and asked,
'Wasn't I married to you once?'
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After an emergency engine shutdown on takeoff, the skilled aviator calmly carried out his drills and after dumping a little fuel, brought his stricken Hercules back to mother earth.....
but rather spoiled it all, admitting that in his report, when mentioning the fuel dumping, he put Bristol Channel, 'cos he couldn't spell Severn Estuary
but rather spoiled it all, admitting that in his report, when mentioning the fuel dumping, he put Bristol Channel, 'cos he couldn't spell Severn Estuary
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Long time ago a stude on JP's at Cranwell called on another Course Mate at OMQ's just before Christmas:
Knocks on door and said Course Mates wife answers.
"Can I speak to Dave"
Wife answers:
"Ickle Bears been naughty and can't come out to play. He's opened all his presents early and Ickle Bears been locked in the airing cupboard"
Aircrew being nasty bitchy people the story got round very quickly. For years to come whenever said Course Mate was in the crewroom all you had to do was whisper "Ickle Bear" and the blush would go from the toes to the crown.
Think Ickle Bear now flies for Spotty M. Sadly wouldn't recognise his voice over the radio . . .
Knocks on door and said Course Mates wife answers.
"Can I speak to Dave"
Wife answers:
"Ickle Bears been naughty and can't come out to play. He's opened all his presents early and Ickle Bears been locked in the airing cupboard"
Aircrew being nasty bitchy people the story got round very quickly. For years to come whenever said Course Mate was in the crewroom all you had to do was whisper "Ickle Bear" and the blush would go from the toes to the crown.
Think Ickle Bear now flies for Spotty M. Sadly wouldn't recognise his voice over the radio . . .
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Westland Scout in Hong kong carrying out night casevac drills,
one on stretcher, one in seat, crewman standing on skid,
Scout climbs to 500ft starts transition, loud bang heard, flames out of trouser legs,
all goes quiet, Crewman screams 'get her down'
cool pilot up front 'Roger gravity selected, stupid boy'.
carries out engine off.
Gazelle, Germany after map reading exercise, pilot climbs to rejoin circuit.
crewman tired/half asleep.
'Mayday, Mayday, Mayday,'
crewman 'hey, sir someone's in trouble'
'Army Air 390', Army Air 390, Army Air 390'
crewman 'Oh, S*#T it's us'
Pilot carries out safe landing.
one on stretcher, one in seat, crewman standing on skid,
Scout climbs to 500ft starts transition, loud bang heard, flames out of trouser legs,
all goes quiet, Crewman screams 'get her down'
cool pilot up front 'Roger gravity selected, stupid boy'.
carries out engine off.
Gazelle, Germany after map reading exercise, pilot climbs to rejoin circuit.
crewman tired/half asleep.
'Mayday, Mayday, Mayday,'
crewman 'hey, sir someone's in trouble'
'Army Air 390', Army Air 390, Army Air 390'
crewman 'Oh, S*#T it's us'
Pilot carries out safe landing.
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Mathematically challenged Controller - 2
A pair of F4s depart a tanker on Towline 6 after completing their second AAR slot:
"Firebird, Neatishead you are identified, check intentions for this third half of the sortie?"
Pause for thought.
"Neatishead, Firebird 1 - confirm third HALF?"
A pair of F4s depart a tanker on Towline 6 after completing their second AAR slot:
"Firebird, Neatishead you are identified, check intentions for this third half of the sortie?"
Pause for thought.
"Neatishead, Firebird 1 - confirm third HALF?"
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Two I heard about recently..
Hyped-up Red Arrows visit to RAF Officers' Mess. Gaggle of unimpressed ATCOs in the bar minding their own, when.........
Red Boiler suit - "Hi, I'm Sqn Ldr Bloggs,RED FIVE"
Unimpressed ATCO - " Hi, Fg Off Brown, PAR TWO!"
(names have been changed to protect the guilty)
Also at a recent Mess mtg discussing higher than welcome central heating temp in accommodation block. A young, blonde and pretty mess member admitted to PMC that she 'Had it off every night!'
Was never like that in my day....mmmn perhaps it was.
Hyped-up Red Arrows visit to RAF Officers' Mess. Gaggle of unimpressed ATCOs in the bar minding their own, when.........
Red Boiler suit - "Hi, I'm Sqn Ldr Bloggs,RED FIVE"
Unimpressed ATCO - " Hi, Fg Off Brown, PAR TWO!"
(names have been changed to protect the guilty)
Also at a recent Mess mtg discussing higher than welcome central heating temp in accommodation block. A young, blonde and pretty mess member admitted to PMC that she 'Had it off every night!'
Was never like that in my day....mmmn perhaps it was.
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Back in the 70s, Blue Peter was doing a report on the Kipper Fleet. Flying with a CXX crew with Roger Y (pilot) and John F (nav), John Noakes finished his interview with the Nav with these immortal words "Thank you John. I'll now go to roger the pilot"
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Rubic Cube
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Rubic Cube
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During the days of Jaguars and the single-seat Strike role (2-man what?) at Bruggen, 2 of the senior flt lts on 20 sqn managed to drop the CBLS (practice bomb carriers) on the range instead of the practice bombs - owing entirely to their failure to check the programming system in the nosewheel bay. These 2 veterans of Nordhorn Range were chatting in the 20 sqn briefing facility when in walks a JP (small with a moustache, jumped out of a Jag on fire on finals and landed in the bank car park).
"Discussing the rev settings for the CBLS are you boys?" ask Jerry.
He was chased back to 17 Sqn for his insufferable cheek.
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~~~ >-}-
Bug Out West
"Discussing the rev settings for the CBLS are you boys?" ask Jerry.
He was chased back to 17 Sqn for his insufferable cheek.
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~~~ >-}-
Bug Out West