ATC Humour (Merged)

[smith]

An american pilot flying over southern england

atc: xxx report your position

a/c: currently 10miles west of Looga burooga

ATC: Ah that will be Loughborough sir

[fyrefli]

ITYF it makes more sense if you spell "Loughborough" correctly

[smith]

sorry I am Scottish, thought it was the same way as Edinburgh was spelt or Edinboro as the yanks say

[Lon More]

The American cousins found a few new places in days gone by; Saint Rumble = Strumble was a favouritr

[undervaluedATC]

I had an American VFR pilot call up and ask for the weather at (phonetically) "Mara - Ka - Dor - e"


had me scratching my head until I figured out he meant Maroochydore. (Ma-roo-chee-door)

[Scooby Don't]

I believe the old story was of a flight of F-111s on a navex.

ATC - "what's your next waypoint and estimate"

F-111 - "St Rumble at xxxx"

ATC - "you must mean Strumble, and where after that?"

F-111 - "then Stabbs at time xxxx"

ATC - "that would be St Abbs...."

[Lon More]

Scooby - pretty good navs then. Two TACANs about 350nm apart. in different countries

[Farmer 1]

Not that it ever came up as regards ATC, but just down the road from St Rumble, sorry, Strumble, is Stan's, sorry, St Annes.

[Storminnorm]

OR POSSIBLY St Aines??

[terrain safe]

OR POSSIBLY St Aines??

Wasn't he a seaman in Captain Pugwash?

[Scooby Don't]

Lon - if an F-111 can fly all the way from Lakenheath to Libya with multiple inflight refuels, and still find the French embassy, I'm pretty sure 350 nm was no problem for them at all. And I did say it was a story. Search under "life: getting a".

[Atcham Tower]

Walls-eye was a common one from Americans, maybe still is. And I once heard Cree-wee for Crewe!

[Ian Brooks]

And of course there was always Dodger Bank in the middle of the North Sea
( that is going back a few years )

Ian

[172_driver]

ATIS recording at Gillespie the other day:

"...advice on initial contact you have information Echooo... Echooo... Echooo"

Gotta cheer those Yankees for some brilliant humour in between all screaming and shouting!!

[smith]

American B52 on a training flight and Instructor pulls an engine on approach

B-52: 30miles out, simulated engine failure for the ILS

ATC: Ah the dreaded seven engine landing, cleared for the approach.

[dagowly]

On PAR - "4 miles, Cxxxx to roll and join"

tower - "call by 2"

PAR - "2 1/4 miles, Cxxxx to roll and join"

tower - "break off the approach, idiot on the runway"

i just started laughing, probably one of those situations you just had to be there

[Skyjuggler]

Overheard the other day by one of our more experienced controllers...

"ABC123, maintain 210kts, standby for the reduction!"

I can only imagine what the pilot thought

I must add quickly, that although his R/T is somewhat less than standard, the old guy can still move traffic

[generalspecific]

flying along in the mighty R22 at all of 90kts.. HK's airspace split into reporting "Zones" and the route was New Town - Tolo - Port Shelter.

I call New Town and then have a brain fart and call entering Port Shelter. Controller says "fastest 22 i've ever seen" ....

[flightsearch]

DLH XXX, turn left heading 315, report new heading

[DC-ATE]

I've read through many, many pages here but must confess I have not read ALL 57 pages...yet. So, I hope something similar has not been posted already.

One of my favorites, and, true:

Years ago when the transition from (Statute) Miles per Hour to (Nautical) Miles per Hour was taking place in the aviation industry there were obviously airplanes with the "older" MPH Airspeed gauges still installed.
One such airplane was Twin Bonanza 5636D.

Seems like 36 Delta was enroute somewhere and the Center asked him for his airspeed.

36 Delta replied, "150 Miles Per Hour, Sir."

The Controller came back with, "What is that in Knots?"

36 Delta replied: "I dunno, this is a Beechcraft, not a Chris Craft, you figure it out!"