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You Know You Are In Africa When.....

African Aviation Regional issues that affect the numerous pilots who work in this area of the world.

You Know You Are In Africa When.....

Old 28th Jun 2011, 18:13
  #461 (permalink)  
 
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Happy Days!
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Old 29th Jun 2011, 19:06
  #462 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
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You know your in Africa when

You land at the airport with a very seriously injured and obviously bleeding casualty onboard and Immigration wont let the awaiting ambulance take the patient to the hospital until his passport has been stamped - oh yes, the man with the stamp had gone home early!
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Old 30th Jun 2011, 04:42
  #463 (permalink)  
 
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That exact thing happened to me in the US inbound lifeguard flight from the Bahamas with a stroke victim. KSFB a few years back and an overzealous customs "agent". Ambulance was waiting, victim delayed for 15 mins whilst said retard searched the obviously dying patient and scrutinized his passport. To that particular agent, I wish you ill will. One good thing about afrika, no dept of homeland security dicks with no accountability and a big attitude. In afrika we have an entire continent where the only people accountable are expats...
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Old 30th Jun 2011, 18:39
  #464 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
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You know you are in Africa when:
-Landing at a former military airfield the remaining guard force mounts a full parade for you and expects you to inspect them.
-Or in another instance you are arrested and have a number of loaded AK47s pointed at you for walking too close to an old AN26 which probably was destroyed 20yrs previous, all this besides the fact you are at the field to pick up the Minister of Defense, who with much arguing manages to have you released.
-You get arrested because your client has put down on his import sheet that he has 70 rounds of ammunition when he only has 69. Poor man had to watch as his pilot was dragged off in handcuffs and interegated for the next 2hrs. Welcome to Africa
-All the pilots are summoned to the local airport to watch a demonstration put on by the fire brigade and they promptly put their aging truck straight through the back wall of the garage. End of demonstration.
-When you are stuck on the apron for a minimum of 2hrs with a plane full of sweating and angry pax waiting for an aging dictator to slowly make his way to his commandeered from the local airline for him, for permission to start up, all the while surrounded by police and army armed to the teeth.
-You have to get permission from the presidents office or the intelligence organisation every time you want to take of from a certain airport.
-You take over from the controller at a field as they have more than 2 aircraft in their circuit and have gone to pieces, so you decide to hell with this and do the controlling yourself.
-Landing at a runway you are informed by the tower that there is 600m unusable of a 1400m strip, which is not a problem if they could tell you where the unusable bit is, but there is the inevitable language barrier and in the end you decide to do a low flypast under the pretense of a GA and the controller threatens to report you for doing a GA. Much to ones amazement you find the unusable bit of the runway is almost right in the middle, so you decide maybe better to land somewhere else rather.
-When you are fined USD250 for landing after 5pm local even though the airport is open till 0200 the following morning for the national airline.

Yet having said that there is no where else in the world I would rather fly, and over the years have had a wonderful time for the most part.
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Old 2nd Jul 2011, 04:35
  #465 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
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4Runner, saw the same thing at KMIA with a dying child. Pathetic and sad.
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Old 2nd Jul 2011, 14:24
  #466 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
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You know when you're in Africa when...

Fabulous thread. Brings back a lot of memories. Do any of the pilots/crew on this thread recall the Jonglei Canal Project in Sudan (the Bucketwheel excavator is still there) from 1976 through to the early 80's?

My Dad (Ron Melander) was a senior engineer on the project and I spent a lot of time flying with Keith Pickett, Peter Clark (RIP, murdered by 'rebels') and others who flew for the likes of Soberi (Islander). We were operating a very (for the conditions) trick 402B (see attached link to pic of her at base camp Sobat) but all sorts of a/c were pressed into action during maintenance e.g. the Soberi Islander, even a Nigerian registered Cherokee for a while and a Navajo C. One rainy season the a/c were even landing on the spoil bank as the usual strip was so wet.

Cessna 402B/Jonglei Canal | Flickr - Photo Sharing!

Whilst flying to Bor to collect some pork one Christmas we were commandeered to fly the coffin of a minister who had been killed in a road accident. Very interesting experience when most of his tribe rocked up at the strip expecting to fit into the 402.

Best wishes,

Marc Melander

Last edited by Eagle402; 2nd Jul 2011 at 15:58.
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Old 2nd Jul 2011, 15:39
  #467 (permalink)  
 
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Old 2nd Jul 2011, 16:02
  #468 (permalink)  
 
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Africa...

Solid Rust Twotter,

That be the very machine albeit in sorry repair compared to the last time I saw her. The Bucket Wheel section (nearest camera in 2nd shot) is disconnected from the Bridge and the diesel-electric generators are missing from the top of the BW section.

When were these shots taken please ? I had heard that the machine had been fired at with RPG's in an attempt to sabotage her but not sure how accurate the rumour was.

Best wishes,

m
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Old 2nd Jul 2011, 17:06
  #469 (permalink)  
 
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OT, but while we're talking about the canal, I was always told that if it had been completed, it would have completely messed up the ecology (something about water in the area at least) of the whole area. I'll resist posting my photo's of the excavator, I'll bet every pilot who has been through Loki/Sudan has 100's
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Old 2nd Jul 2011, 17:21
  #470 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
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Arica

Shrike200,

The eco debate raged for years before the project was started and even during the initial excavation we were visited by the Cousteau's and their Catalina as they had 'concerns'. The project also featured on BBC Horizon and in 'Geo' - the French version of National Geographic. There is talk of re-starting the canal but from what I've seen and heard of the machine the costs of getting her working again make that a very remote chance and that's before you even address the safety of the workforce.

Plus, that machine was designed for the canals it dug in Pakistan and not the soil in Sudan. There were huge technical issues with the buckets which were continually being modified as the soil had a high clay content and used to stick to the buckets.

I would appreciate a PM with just a few of your pics if you get a moment. My Dad spent 7 years responsible for that machine in Pakistan and a tough 4 years in Sudan.

Best wishes,

m

p.s. is there any way of finding out the fate of the 402 ? Her Sudanese reg was ST-AGU.

Last edited by Eagle402; 2nd Jul 2011 at 18:31.
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Old 5th Jul 2011, 21:38
  #471 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
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no disruption intended 402.

Being given a manifest in Port Harcourt that showed a " Mrs Kat .... " over our head count ( yep, posh l know ) apparently weighing 112kg using standard weights.
Well, the despatcher was called back.
He arrived at the same time as the no.1 returned after investigating, who whispered " that seat is occupied by a cat in a basket".

First question ? seemed reasonable to me " the cat belongs to Mrs.......?"

"Yes."

Second question ? equally reasonable l would venture, " why 112kg ?"

"lt`s a female cat"

He`s on firm ground now and confidence returning.

"Ok, that`s 77kg and the rest?"

"the cat is pregnant" he said as he left the aircraft proudly, leaving me wondering about the bags and freight.
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Old 10th Jul 2011, 11:57
  #472 (permalink)  
 
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Devil Africa...

... and you will soon find out that the old rule "Cook it, peel it - or forget it!" will not safe you from Montezuma's Revenge as long as the kitchen staff is using water from the local river to clean the dishes and the cutlery ...
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Old 10th Jul 2011, 16:37
  #473 (permalink)  
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Today you check into your new room in Lagos for a stay of 4 weeks.

You unpack and sleep. Next you try to take a shower - bit difficult as there is no water.

You move rooms into what appears to be a converted cupboard - however there is water (both hot and cold which is a real bonus) and the internet even works (at dial up type speeds of course). So you unpack and decide to take a look out of the window - the view is a bit surprising as it is a view of another hotel corridor and doesn't look outside at all. So you pack again.

The next room seems OK but this time I check for internet and TV - none of either - but at least this time I've had the sense not to unpack.

Finally I move into room number 4 where everything seems to work for now - but I won't hold my breath.

Would have been good if they had offered me room number 4 the first time around, but I suppose my activities brighten up a hotel receptionist's otherwise boring day.
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Old 10th Jul 2011, 23:06
  #474 (permalink)  
 
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Shaka Zulu's revenge maybe, were a bit far for Montezuma to be concerned unless you believe in trans atlantic trade before 1492
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Old 11th Jul 2011, 03:52
  #475 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
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Today you check into your new room in Lagos for a stay of 4 weeks.
You unpack and sleep. Next you try to take a shower - bit difficult as there is no water.

You move rooms into what appears to be a converted cupboard - however there is water (both hot and cold which is a real bonus) and the internet even works (at dial up type speeds of course). So you unpack and decide to take a look out of the window - the view is a bit surprising as it is a view of another hotel corridor and doesn't look outside at all. So you pack again.

The next room seems OK but this time I check for internet and TV - none of either - but at least this time I've had the sense not to unpack.

Finally I move into room number 4 where everything seems to work for now - but I won't hold my breath.

Would have been good if they had offered me room number 4 the first time around, but I suppose my activities brighten up a hotel receptionist's otherwise boring day.
Ahh, sounds like the (in)famous Woodridge in lovely Ajao Estate.
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Old 11th Jul 2011, 06:55
  #476 (permalink)  
 
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...The old Djibouti Jacuzzi...

Aka The Angolan Shuffle, Kinshasa Lap Dance or the Calcutta Splutter.
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Old 11th Jul 2011, 12:12
  #477 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
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Devil Splatter etc.

I'm sure there are thousands of different expressions for this kind of st.

At least it seems I touched a topic of general interest.
I had not expected that many replies ...

Or as the former German Chancellor said in 1984: "What counts is the final result."


Back to main topic:

The 7 basic lies you're facing whilst flying in Africa:

1. The car/taxi is coming.
2. Fuel/tanker is on its way.
3. The flight plan is in the system and accepted.
4. Don't worry about anything!
5. Everything is taken care of.
6. It will take 5 minutes only...
7. I'm the General Manager of all ...(Business)... of all ...(Country).

Enjoy!

Last edited by Himmel-Hund; 11th Jul 2011 at 21:54. Reason: Fingertrouble
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Old 11th Jul 2011, 13:36
  #478 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
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One night in the bar...

The Australian next to me downed his pint of Satzenbrau in one go, looked off into the middle distance then turned to me and said, 'You know, it is a brave man who farts in West Africa.'

I could only nod in silent agreement, for what was there to say to that, really?
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Old 26th Jul 2011, 14:32
  #479 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
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I've enjoyed reading these Any more?
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Old 26th Jul 2011, 17:16
  #480 (permalink)  
 
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Body-bag and a shovel?!

I calls that looxury!
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