Putin's promised "Christmas cease fire" was just as true as all his other promises

Ukrainian soldier tells wife

"Sorry honey, I am going to be late for the children's Christmas party, I need to take out the trash first"

Whut yoo look'ng at boy !

Ahhhm just exxxeriszing mah second amendment rights !

Invisible elves reassembled the belt as the links were ejected.

Having been sacked by the board of Christmas Enterprises Plc for inappropriate behaviour on a global scale, Santa seeks revenge....

Dasher, Dancer, Tracer, Vixen, Tracer, Cupid, Tracer and Blitzen. Now back to Strictly Dancing...

A jolly old man slipping down my chimney was scary enough when he wasn’t packing an M60.

Later the Met pounced on the Jolly man in the red suit in the Croydon Shopping Centre.... In court Mr J Saville claimed the children bouncing on his knee were all consenting...

" I'm a Celebrity get me out of here" was the cry when the latest challenge to get stars for the camp realised the critters we're fighting back..

At the Christmas Fair in St Alban's the operator in the " shoot the duck " stall realised the small print allowed the fair goers to bring their own pop gun..

Officer John McLane descides the terrorists won't takeover the Airport...not on his watch

In a new Christmas Day episode of Fools and Horses, the writers descide that Del will clean up the mean streets of Peckham....once and for all.

Before melting into the Christmas Day throng of Park Run Santa's, Ronaldo descides to prove once and for all he is the greatest living football GOAT...

Having rushed to his post to defend the base, Pfc Hoskins grabbed the first coat he could find....later realised he had forgotten any trousers....oh how the other troopers laughed when they saw all he had on were stockings and suspenders....well it is lonely out here for 6 months at a time he blushed...

It wouldn't be Christmas without a little chamber music.

"You'd like a new coat for Xmas? Well, here's a copper jacket, you steaming little pile of ....."

Milk and Cookies break to let it cool or change the barrel again , and keep plinking the naughtiest ones first

On the picket line for more sociable hours the Santa union get a bit militant...

After Covid lockdown the Religious Zealots come out the wood work and start knocking on front doors again...Santa reacts with " Get off .. this is my time of the year..."

Wilbur, I think giving little Billy Bob a M60 Machine Gun for a Christmas Present was a little premature...he's only 6...
Honey, well he handled last years AR15 well so he's due a upgrade...