"OK, i've written it up in the 700 for all to see, on this day the Nav successfully located.....his balls"

"It says here after we have dropped our nuke we are to proceed to....this page intentionally blank?"

https://cimg6.ibsrv.net/gimg/pprune....e457cbac00.jpg

"It's in braille"
"Ahh, that'll be the Navs contour map"

"Ok, according to this, we are supposed to fly several thousand miles to a place called Stanley, none of us have ever heard of and miss the runway"

Right...so which of these stickers are we going to zap on the gear doors with...?

Ttfn

Moscow... Moscow... how do you spell it?

...and I've a letter here from a Mr Betjeman, it seems he would like us to bomb Slough.

In my Janes book of British Aircraft Markings I have ticked off,XH555 XH556 XH557 XH558 XH559 XH560 XH562 XH563 XH564 XH565 and XH566

Now which one am I missing?

Its from the doc, One of us has got the clap

I'm still waiting for Page 3 of The Sun to be published in Braille!

Nav please can you check that Group Captain Mandrake said it was "Wing Attack Plan R"

Todays Horoscope says I am going on a long, one way trip soon

What do you mean, you cannot find it?
Behind you
Oh no it isn't
Oh yes it is

It says here, "Never let them take a photo of you in these caps when we are looking down, or people will see why we call them c**t caps."

It says, In no circumstances must this manual be removed from the briefcase.

"Oh bugger it says read and then eat to prevent falling into enemy hands"

Yes, yes, I know we've all been in and had a look, but it definitely says right here that crew accommodation is top of the stairs, on the left.

"Well, it says Chicken en Papillote with croutons and a sweet tomato vinaigrette sauce, so I take it that means stale bread chicken sandwiches with ketchup wrapped in a paper bag again, mind you last time it was described as a poussin and turned out to be a boiled egg."

Right....Appendix E.....Rear Crew Emergency Escape Procedures.....it just says "Mind the stairs".