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Caption Competition Mk III

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Caption Competition Mk III

Old 30th Mar 2021, 12:17
  #901 (permalink)  
 
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Hoskins couldn't understand why his boss sent him for parachute training, as he was travelling as pax.
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 12:23
  #902 (permalink)  
 
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Unfortunately, the Aircrew Parachute Course that involved jumping from a Hercules into Poole Harbour had been cancelled on cost grounds. Hoskins couldn't understand the reasoning because the savings were just a drop in the ocean.
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 13:00
  #903 (permalink)  
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AD 1978 caption, BBC Head of Light Entertainment to the DG: "I'm not really sure who is on Top of the Pops this week, I believe these are Pansy People or The Village Idiots or some such silly name..."
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 14:33
  #904 (permalink)  
 
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Jesus have you seen the woodworm, it's a death trap I tell you. Condem the structure. ....
Don't you know there's a War on. Do you think the Jerry's will use soft rubber swimming aids as you land?
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 14:36
  #905 (permalink)  
 
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Bert, the clocks striking 3, that's your signal to come out.


​​​​
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 14:40
  #906 (permalink)  
 
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Pike......Captain Mainwaring, I can see the German Invasion Fleet.....
Captain......Stupid boy we're 60 miles inland
Fraser.....Why is it called Walmington-on-sea then?
Sgt Wilson....Very high tide sir?
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 15:51
  #907 (permalink)  
 
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"Don't deploy your chute until you're 10 feet off the ground Paddy."
"Bejeezus, and what if the thing doesn't work?"
"You can jump 10 feet can't you?"
"I, that I can, let's be going then"
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 15:51
  #908 (permalink)  
 
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 15:57
  #909 (permalink)  
 
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Agents deploying to Eastern Europe receive anti-defenestration training.
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 15:59
  #910 (permalink)  
 
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Don't worry, look, they've turned the sound down so no one will hear your screams.
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 17:21
  #911 (permalink)  
 
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After the black queen ran off with a white knight, and a bishop was caught in flagrante with a pawn, the Potentate tired of chess and set up a cuckold clock.
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 17:22
  #912 (permalink)  
 
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Why exactly do I need a reserve 'chute?
Well of your main does not open you pull the reserve
Jesus is gravity not so strong in Aldershot?
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 17:24
  #913 (permalink)  
 
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Chu Chu shows how his mind really works, unless it's a predictive text error.
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 18:47
  #914 (permalink)  
 
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Well, they don't look much birds . . .
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 19:30
  #915 (permalink)  
 
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I tawt I taw a puddy ta......🐱..
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 19:42
  #916 (permalink)  
 
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Are you sure that this thing is the same height as Salisbury Cathedral?
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 21:05
  #917 (permalink)  
 
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It was later discovered the instructor had entered the wrong weight in the spring mechanism.
Has anyone got a long ladder?
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Old 30th Mar 2021, 21:13
  #918 (permalink)  
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Judging this time tomorrow.
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Old 31st Mar 2021, 06:23
  #919 (permalink)  
 
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Well it looked bigger on 'flea'bay
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Old 31st Mar 2021, 06:24
  #920 (permalink)  
 
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Was expecting a bit more space in the Yurt. Should have read the small print.
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