Was the cruise liner listing at the time???

Ozzy

Tomato juice
 

It's loaded with umami - to some it may taste better at 8000 feet. As shown on Heston Blumenthal programme recently. I am amazed that noone has done research into the 'taste at altitude' phenomenon before now.

IIRC a fair amount of research HAS been done.

The wine and champagne served in-flight has usually been selected specially for the purpose. The subtleties of a good Bordeaux or a good champagne get totally lost at 8000 ft.

As to in-flight meals.... well, no comment.
Somebody must have done something to assure they still vaguely fit the Trade Description Act as food.
Considering what they "taste" like at 8000 ft, I'd be curious to taste one at ground level some time....

CJ

It was mostly due to the loss of moisture both in the food and from the the olfactory gland; his solution was the squirt water up passengers noses before they ate.

Anyway, now back to topic:
It still tastes vile though!

I was on a non-aviation forum yesterday where a passenger was describing their involvement in a minor in-flight emergency. They described "The Airbags" as coming down which shows a profound understanding of the system and intense concentration on the Safety Brief. When I pointed out the difference between airbags and oxygen masks. Forum members gave me grief for being so picky (Picky is the peasants word for pedantic, presumably?)

Well Keith jumps in with a quick first - and quite apposite - comment although he may not realise it :E

It's utterly amusing and ironic that a bunch of low-class servers/glorified wait staff are gathered together to exchange what they think are funny anecdotes on the people paying their pathetic laughable salaries. Are you guys really in your thirties and making US$28,000 a year (about US$2,300 a month, data from this forum)?

I think all that flying and jetlag, pushing of trolleys to dispense food and beverage and fetching of newspapers have eroded your brains to the point that you have forgotten who you are and who we are. You're the lowly peon paid to serve us. That's your job and who you are.

Do it well with a smile and shut up after you're done serving.

worldtraveller7
 

....and what did you do to get exiled to Singapore?

I'm holding a rewarding job here which pays me 6 times annually of what you would ever make annually, which does not involve being a peon, and I'm not even 30.

Says the troll who dislikes crew so much he is on a Cabin Crew Specific website. Go play with your toys little boy.

Anyone who despises you a troll? Is that your coping mechanism for being a server and making £1,200-£1400 a month? How do you survive?

If you must know, I registered an account to find out about pilot's salary because my stupid brother is interested in signing on the dotted line.

If you believe I was a troll, then my insults are not really real, then you won't feel so hurt right? The truth is I really do despise you servers. Bunch of peons. I'd tell you in your face except I know you are all low-class enough to spit in my whiskey. ;)

As a humble PAX..
 

May I offer some apologies for worldtraveler(sic)7, and his misguided view of the world.

I, too, may well be on more of a wedge than the CC who serve me the odd snack and look after my safety whilst I fly.
Do I need to advertise this? No.

I am also aware that remuneration in the service sector is often less than in manufacturing or indeed, banking. For all I know, worldtraveler7 may well be a banker.
Other rhyming slang references are also available..:E

To denigrate a bunch of people for what they earn is crass and unnecessary and perhaps the mods should banish this "banker" to somewhere far away.

For what its worth, I think you do a demanding job very well and the thread has given me much amusement and the feeling of there but for the grace of God, go I.

Power to your collective elbows, chaps and chapesses.

worldtraveler7 no longer travels with us on PPRuNe...

Normally, his/her posts would be deleted, but in this instance, I'm inclined to leave them where they are as a prime example of... Thick passenger comments

:ugh:

Hurrah!
 

That'll be several - nil to the Mods.

Well said TS! :D

What worldtraveler7 doesn't comprehend, is that people can be happy.

He may sit in Singapore earning a vast amount of cash waving his tiny penis in the air asking for somebody to kiss his bum, clearly denied the breast at birth.

Yes flight attendants of todays generation are paid peanuts in comparison to their colleagues of yesteryear, fact. However aviation is a career you dream about as a kid, as a pilot or a flight attendant, I can't imagine many kids aspiring to be bankers, or middle management. Unfortunately businessmen know that these jobs are aspirational, therefore a surplus number of people wish to become pilots/flight attendants, therefore offering lower salaries because they know they can get people into jobs for less money, makes perfect business sense.

I had a flight where our sole flight attendant saved a little girls life after she swallowed a sweet whole and got lodged in her throat. The flight attendants actions of the heimlich maneuver, back slaps and basically beating the living day lights out of this little girl to save her life. How many people can genuinely say they have single handedly saved a life all in a days work (baring the medical profession)? All we did up front was dive the aircraft into the nearest airport as safely and quickly as possible, we felt we did nothing, the cabin attendant was the bees knees. So yes hopefully on a routine flight all you get from the CC is the safety demo and a cup of tea, but if need be, they are the right people for the job when the smelly stuff hits the fan.

The first person worldtraveller7 would ask assistance from when he's in an emergency onboard an aircraft are flight attendants, guaranteed.

So whilst people are enjoying their lives and loving their job earning less money compared to low life scum like world traveller7 who clearly find the need to shout about how much money he has to cover up the fact his life is worthless and is just a waste of Oxygen.

Oh, and a thick comment made by a passenger after diverting and the ambulance staff had taken the little girl to hospital, one self obsessed :mad: asked if he would still make his connection to Manchester :yuk:

I would say to Worldtraveler7, how would he feel if the useless CC on his flight decided not to board and leave the passengers on their own.
As a highly paid #anker would he be happy to not get any safety help, food and drink service etc?

I am a well travelled person currently working in Sainsbury's as a checkout operative (!!!) but I happen to travel in Business class when I travel UK-Manila etc, I would never fail to say PLEASE, THANK-YOU to any of the "staff" onboard.

I understand that they are paid to FIRSTLY ensure my safety never known a #anker to look after my safety, secondly to try to keep me happy whilst onboard their company aircraft to try to get me to fly again with them. I admire them as they work as I see,"stupid" hours , on at stupid o'clock, off after a long day but always (sorry 99% of the time) friendly, smiley and very effiecient.

I have worked in the customer service industry since the age of 19 to present day (I forget how old....maybe 44...), so I understand the pressures. Strangely in all my jobs the most I earned in a year was £15,000, but that is largely irrelevent, some people earn 6x the salary of cabin crew and seem to think this means something.;)

Keep on doing a superb job CC and of course flight crew, I wouldn't be safe without you. Food, drink, service of duty free's is (to me) an added advantage. Something I really enjoy, forget trolls like the moron that has been banned, I've seen these pratts onboard, I try to ignore them or belittle them, they are not worth it.

PS:
I'm on flight QR... to Manila via Doha from Manchester on 17th April....
Can I have some free wine? Oh sorry, think I get this extra service anyway....:D

PS: If I have insulted any #ankers, I DO NOT apologise. :p

He's gone now (couldn't possibly be a She with that attitude) so shall we move on?

And quite possibly ever since. While I agree with the mod's suggestion that we move on, I'd just like to add my 2p to reassure crew that not all of us hold those who contribute to our travelling safety in such low regard.

Please carry on, boys and girls. I enjoy reading your confirmation of what I generally suspect about those seated around me. (And they of me, no doubt). :ok:

Cymmon - how on earth can you afford Business class UK-Manila if you work on the checkouts at Sainsburys?!

First time Traveller?
 

A funny one from India.

Aircraft in level flight, FL200, dead calm, dirty brown haze below, cloudless blue all around.

Ding ding, CC, "Captain, there's a lady here asking why we aren't moving, She says we're sitting up here making lots of noise, but not going anywhere".

Captain, "Aah, tell her not to worry, while we're sitting up here, the earth is revolving underneath us, when Jabalpur comes, we'll come down again".

Short pause, CC, " Thank you Captain, explanation accepted"

:D

At the request of the masses....(one person).....


"Michel Hazanavicius got me into trouble"


....Because of his movie.

Smack bang in the middle of the service a lady complained that her headset was not working. Being the star that I am, I replaced it immediately despite the hot plates backed up in the galley and told her I would check on her later.

I went back and asked her if things were satisfactory with the replacement...she said no, this new headset was broken too, not an unusual situation on our planes as the cords get frazzled by constant use and break all the time.

Spotting her annoyed face across the cabin after her THIRD headset I went back, feeling quite bad for her plight as she had paid a pretty penny for this First Class seat....

"It is still not working" := she proclaimed, "I cannot hear the talking".

I put the headset against my ear, looked at the screen....and she was watching The Artist- Hollywood silent film blockbuster.

How could I not burst out laughing?! Some things are just drop-dead funny and defy 'professional' courtesy, i am not an android and this was amusing as hell to me!

Subsequent complaint about feeling I had ridiculed her, had been condescending etc made to my CSM....and I got a dressing down about being more sensitive! Bloody hell :ugh:

Good One
 

:D:ok: LOL on that one

Redbull

Some people just can't accept they're stupid so try to remain superior by such actions... seems to me the 'SLF' lost the moral high ground...

:E

RedBullAddict,
Nice one..... !
Funnily enough, most internet video (YouTube, various news orgs) will have a warning if there is (for some reason) no accompanying audio. Seems that somebody missed an occasion.

CJ

PS I haven't seen the movie yet, but if it is "in the style of" an ancient B/W silent movie, they could have added the appropriate piano player sound track....

Watched some tool stand up to get something from the o/h bins just as we flared for landing recently.

CC right in there with, "SIR! SIT DOWN NOW! YES, YOU! SIT DOWN, NOW!":ok:

Moron.:rolleyes:



Hilarious.:E

Aer Fungus flight, US bound from Shannon. Johnny & Mary are in the autumn of their years, & are going to visit their son in Boston. Mary is in the window seat, Johnny in the middle, & large Yank guy in the aisle seat. Mary is a bit deaf.......

Yank: Where are you folks headed?
Johnny: Boston, to see our boy there.
Mary: What did he say?
Johnny: Repeats Yank's question.
Yank: Where in Ireland are you from?
Johnny: Tralee.
Yank: I had the worst sex in my life in Tralee, years ago.
Mary: What did he say?
Johnny: He said he thinks he knows you.

HB

Another crew member was told that 'the pilot should know better than to fly this fast through turbulence!' After a bit of back-and-forth explaining how the turbulence and airspeed is not an issue, the crew member gave up and walked off.

True story.

ash.1111

Perhaps the passenger wasn't so wrong & the crew member wasn't so right.... Turbulence & airspeed very much are an issue. Just like driving your car along a rough road surface, going slower helps to reduce the jarring on the car.

Train ticket serivce inbound to LGW.
Pax: "Can I have a ticket to London Victoria please".
Me: "Sure, Madam. Would you like a single or a return ticket?"
Pax: "What's the difference?"
Me: "Well, the single is for just one way, the return in also for coming back."
Pax: "But they are the same price, aren't they?"
Me: "No, Madam, the return ticket is just a little bit less than double the price of a single."
Pax: "Oh, which one do you think I should get?"
Me: "Are you retunring back to Gatwick within 30 days?"
Pax: "No, this is it, this is my return flight home"
Me: "In that case, Madam, I think you should have the single."
:ugh:

After purchasing an underwater case for an Iphone the pax asked;

"how do you make a phone call"

"sorry?"

"With the case on it, how do you make a phone call?"

"It's for use underwater"

"Yes, how do I make a call"

"underwater?"

"yes"

"erm......."

;)

I have worked in service industries all my life. The phrase:
was one I learnt in my young days working at a posh hotel in London. The head porter told me: "The moment they walk in the door - their arms drop off and they can't even pick up their own newspaper."

Still true today.
It's a wonderful thread which I totally understand. I work in beareavement and we have to share some of the better ones we get to see and hear. It does not change the professional approach to the client. You want to hear what doctors say about us???? :eek:

On boarding a lady pax approaches me at the rear galley. The conversation goes like this:

"Hi, I'm also a flight attendant for Air xyz"
"Oh, hi, great, how are you?"
"I'm ok, but..... it hurts to piss."
"Oh, ok....................(wtf ???) Is there anything I can do for you?"
"Ah, no, I will be fine, I'll just have lots of cranberry juice to make me go to the toilet."
"Ok, well, thanks for telling me."

I stood there stunned, took a few minutes before it sank that it really did happen and I didn't just have a weird dream dozing in my crew seat.

I fly for an airline in China. One of our flights had one passenger missing at the headcount. Several attempts were made to rectify the discrepancy but the number of boarding cards matched the manifest, but there was still one passenger less on the aircraft. Then one of the cabin crew noticed a little old Chinese lady holding an urn to her chest. Yep, she was returing her deceased husband to the ancestral home for burial (v.impotant to Chinese) and she had bought him a ticket! Not only that, but the check in staff had checked him in.

We now have a stated policy that souls of the decased fly for free!

Pax standing at the tiny cupboard door that says "Wheelchair Stowage Only"

Pax - Think someone's been in that toilet for an awful long time

Crew- Looks at the tiny cupboard door approx 4 ft high, looks back at pax & wonders how they hell they manage in day to day life......

Love your stories. Our odious Singaporean friend should be on the receiving end of some of the treatment served here http://www.pprune.org/dg-p-general-a...ml#post7377964

I love this thread! Keep them coming :P

Recently on an Canada Jazz flight from YQY to YHZ.

Very funny (and happy) male flight attendant. Dunno if well known (in cabin crew circles) but I got the distinct feeling he liked playing to his "audience", especially before take-off. :D Who is he ?

I love it when passengers try to open up the little latches on the bulkhead on a 737.

World's smallest toilet for sure!