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What's New In W. Africa (Nigeria)

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Old 22nd Jul 2010, 08:24
  #4021 (permalink)  
 
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212man Perhaps if the Bard of the Delta could give me a clue in the style of a Dutch Master I'd work it out! But I don't really want to find I know the guy!

unstable load Thats what SM would probably say if anyone called Shell's contract award mindless.
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Old 22nd Jul 2010, 17:43
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Superior Intellect

It is because of my superior intelligence that gives me the ability to identify B.S. when I see it.............like they say ... B.S. baffles brains.

It's only mindless to those of insufficient mind to grasp it in the first place
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Old 22nd Jul 2010, 17:51
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It is because of my superior intelligence that gives (sic) me the ability to identify B.S. when I see it.............like they say ... B.S. baffles brains.
It is because of my superior intelligence that (I HAVE) the ability to identify B.S.

One hundred lines Bunker.
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Old 22nd Jul 2010, 18:05
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For sox6. Don Maclean based his song Starry, Starry Night on Van Gogh's painting, which the master painted whilst in an asylum in St Remy in 1889. When the seasons change migraines start and sufferers see the world through a weird psychedelic haze, technically called an aura where everything becomes surreal. An aura, is what it's technically called. Everything becomes surreal and yet so real. Like staring at a Cezanne or a Van Gogh. Van Gogh, the Dutch Master, suffered from violent Migraines, or 'sick headaches,' as they were then called. Migraines at that time were perceived as mild insanity. He shares this affliction with Harry the Headache
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Old 22nd Jul 2010, 20:44
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Grac old lad.....you are a treat!
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Old 22nd Jul 2010, 23:22
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Can we please stop this non-sense of pyscho literature and Dutch art? God I hate literature (not as much as poetry though)! Please, leave all the poetic dribble on Literature Rumers.org or European Art.org and let's focus on the situation in Nigeria. Geez, like we don't have enough rumors to clarify already.
Thanks Gents.
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Old 23rd Jul 2010, 00:21
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Originally Posted by loav8r
let's focus on the situation in Nigeria.
Which is what graculus is doing. Quite eloquently, too
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Old 23rd Jul 2010, 07:38
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Devil

Can we please stop this non-sense of pyscho literature and Dutch art? God I hate literature (not as much as poetry though)! Please, leave all the poetic dribble on Literature Rumers.org or European Art.org and let's focus on the situation in Nigeria. Geez, like we don't have enough rumors to clarify already.
Ah ... Philistine .

Our society distributes itself into Barbarians, Philistines, and Populace; and America is just ourselves, with the Barbarians quite left out, and the Populace nearly.... Matthew Arnold, Culture and Anarchy
Just to further exasperate and enrage loav8r a quote from another North American, Canadian Poet Louis Dudek

The philistine provides the best definition of art. Anything that makes him rage is first class.


It should be borne in mind that the Philistia are said to have formed part of the great conferacy of sea-faring ship raiders who caused such problems to Kimg Ramses III. Another of their traits was that following violent conquest, they always burnt rich cities to the ground. They made no attempt to retain this wealth, but instead built new settlements of a lower cultural and economic level atop the ruins.

They bear in this, a great resemblance to the Norse pirates of the eighth century, the old Norse feminine noun, Viking referring to an overseas expedition.


.... with grateful thanks to Uilleam Skaespeare, the lesser-known bard ...

Act 1 .... Scene 2 ....
A viking longship in the Bight of Biafra, dawn.....

BJORN ( A Viking Chief)

I stand in the prow of my fine craft, scanning the sea both front and aft.
I’ve left my lands, my fiord, my past, to discover the fabled shores of Afrika at last.
Riches untold in that land of baobab honey, (the nice set kind that’s not too runny)
I’ll bring a fortune in my hold, and pay off my debts to the gods of old
No more will Thor be on my case, since I lost a load on yon horse race.
Sail with me warriors! Strike up a song!!
To raise our spirits as the journey will be long
We’ll see a landfall 'ere the new moon – I can see us finding Nigeria sometime soon!

VIKING WARRIOR (A Viking Warrior)
Land Ho!!!!

BJORN ....
What????

VIKING WARRIOR
Land ho!! Off the port beam!!!

BJORN
Oh……

OLAF (Another Viking)
He’s right my Lord I see a shape, Bonny isle beneath night’s cape
We’ll make landfall before o’er long, so there’s not really much time to strike up a song.

BJORN
Ohh, I thought Nigeria would be much further, are you really sure it’s not some place other?

OLAF
Yes my Lord there is no doubt, see even the sun sets the other way about!
In the east and not the west, like the wisemen wisely guessed.

BJORN
Send for Ragnar he is clever, we’ll question him and he’ll endevour
To explain it all in easy terms, that tax not my brain

OLAF
Send forth Ragnar The Clever

VIKING WARRIOR
Send forth Ragnar

RAGNAR (A clever Viking)
My Lord I’m here, you wish my aid? My Council? Or perhaps some mead?

BJORN
I’ve no time for drink despite its merits, Look, see before us! Lands to inherit!
Is this Nigeria in all its glory? As the Bard’s once formed in story?

RAGNAR
Uhhhhhhhhhhhh, yes. Probably.

OLAF
And it looks a green and fertile place, with trees and woods with a delicate grace
And farms and pastures overstuffed, with grasscutter and goat to make us chuffed!

BJORN
And what about hives? And bees and honey?

RAGNAR
I’m sure there’s plenty worth the journey.

BJORN
Then to the oars and strike for land! Let us ready our warrior band.
This day we plunder and we pillage. In fact we’ll start with Bonny Town! ....

.... exit stage right....



.... not painted by a Dutch Master ...

... or for all denizens of Philistia,

I hear rumours that ConDoctor are, at last, on their way from the land of Hamlet Happy now
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Old 23rd Jul 2010, 08:09
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Probably the most entertaining exchange on WNIWA for almost 4000 posts! (I added 'almost 4000' for the ones who think their posts are almost as entertaining and the ones that are - mainly by chucks)
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Old 23rd Jul 2010, 10:18
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Mmmm ...

.... Probably the most entertaining exchange on WNIWA for almost 4000 posts! ....


Have to agree ......
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Old 23rd Jul 2010, 10:28
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I agree! I had not expected such wide range of response styles. Though Harry's initials would have done (and still would).

We should not forget the real joke is the Shell farce in Nigeria.

A week on from 'D-Day' any word on how the recruiting is going? I've not even seen an advert (and no I am not that desperate*).






* Even if our sea defences fail and I get washed into Bavaria I still doubt I'd sign up for Caverty!
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Old 23rd Jul 2010, 12:52
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Esbjerg-firma får kæmpeordre - TV SYD - TVSyd - Nyheder - Lokal - Esbjerg

In Danish but they are on there way!
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Old 23rd Jul 2010, 13:43
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So they will arrive 1 month after ACN had to start flying for Shell.

I wonder when they will be ready to take over from ACN? At least if they fly the service Bristow used to do with the S-76C they will be spared the swamp sites, hijacks and gunfire.

But more importantly best of luck boys.

Any chance of a ferry flight diary / video like Bristow's Rosh did to Ghana?
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Old 23rd Jul 2010, 15:30
  #4034 (permalink)  
 
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Nice video - I hadn't realised lemmings were blue!
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Old 23rd Jul 2010, 19:05
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sox6,
Macbeth was supposedly first performed in Hampton Court in 1606 for King James I and his bother-in-law [sic], Christian, King of Denmark. In the opening scene of Act IV, Billy the Bard reproduced a sacred black-magic ritual which apparently was so authentic that real witches decided to cast their own spell on the play Macbeth that still haunts it to this day. Supposedly, saying the name "Macbeth" inside a theater will bring bad luck to the play and anyone acting in it. Saying the name of Harry the Headache inside our Theatre of the Absurd could have the same effect, so I can only draw your attention to the following image, which, if you do your research will give you the initials you seek. Whatever you do, say naught to loav8r, who doesn't like literature




chc,
Of course they're coming, I already said so diddle I
On Tuesday evening many a scene was played out stage right...

Ragnar ... By love, who first did prompt me to inquire;
He lent me counsel and I lent him eyes.
I am no pilot; yet, wert thou as far
As that vast shore wash'd with the farthest sea,
I would adventure for such merchandise.

... tomorrow I'll be in my bird ...

Judit ... Sweet, so would I:
Yet I should kill thee with much cherishing.
Good night, good night! parting is such
sweet sorrow
That I shall say good night till it be morrow....

Exuent

Some days later, having had a voyage of discovery ...

SEVENTEEN hours of flight, and twice seven hours of storm
...
We look on Europe, mistress as of yore
Of the fair earth and of the hearts of men.
Ay, this is the famed rock which Hercules
And Goth and Moor bequeath'd us. At this door
England stands sentry. God! to hear the shrill
Sweet treble of her fifes upon the breeze,
And at the summons of the rock gun's roar
To see her red coats marching from the hill!

.... that evening in a minted tea bar in old Marrakech ...

Pehr ... A foutre for the world and worldlings base!
I speak of Africa and golden joys ...

... Shall dunghill curs confront our Helicopters?
And shall good news be baffled?
Then, Pehr, lay thy head in Furies' lap...

Dos't think this tea containeth mint or mushrooms fair Bendt

....

Never mind fair Ragnar, soon we shall arrive to chants of "Oyibo pepe. If e eat-e pepe, you go yellow more more" and our long saga (Act 2, scene 3) will finish ... with Acts 3, scenes 1 to 5 to report ....

... sinks to oblivion and dreams luscious dreams of waving palms with ducky maidens coyly beckoning .... (well it had been a long day and he was a great fan of Donald )

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Old 24th Jul 2010, 08:11
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I wonder when they will be ready to take over from ACN? At least if they fly the service Bristow used to do with the S-76C they will be spared the swamp sites, hijacks and gunfire.

It doesn't matter when they'll be ready because they'll never take over, not in the way ACN do, although ACN aren't having a great deal of luck with serviceability just now.

Why do you think they'll be spared the swamp sites and all that they entail? It was only the Bristow S76 based in Lagos which flew mostly to the Bonga (you seem to have forgotten the time that was attacked as an example from MEND that even far offshore deepwater locations were not outside their theatre of operations). Bristow usually had at least 1 S76, either an A++ or a C+ and often 2, based either in Port Harcourt or Warri and flying in to the swamps (as often as not because the EC155s were, as usual, broken). Of the 6 EC155s it's a rare day that more than 4 are serviceable.


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Old 25th Jul 2010, 21:15
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Early on the rumour was that the 155s would be replaced by AW139s from GHC in 2012.

Why not EC175s? Shell are supper keen on the latest and greatest and DanCopter do have EC175 orders. Why involve GHC?
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Old 25th Jul 2010, 22:17
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Oh dear, some things are not rumours! Despite Smell's supper preferences (i'd heard Roast rib of beef with horseradish, personally) the contract calls for 7 AW 139s starting early in 2011

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Old 25th Jul 2010, 22:48
  #4039 (permalink)  
 
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It's only mindless to those of insufficient mind to grasp it in the first place
bunker24

I do so hate it when those so lacking in character or education feel that they can abuse me by PM, rather than post in public and receive a suitable reply. Much though it goes against the grain, it's obvious that you have no shame or character, so deserve to have your own mindset exposed for the comments of all - something you doubtless dislike. You obviously have no knowledge of the size of my computer


deleted by SP: Pm's are NOT to be quoted in public!
... Oh, btw, here's my riposte to your angry rant


Oh dear, having a little anger management problem are we? I find this is often the case with mindless, pig-ignorant philistines

I'm so pleased to know it makes you mad If I can be bothered to continue with my most pleasurable fishing trip, I'll be sure to make a special mention of you
...
oh, I seem to have done just that. You probably think that a suitable rejoinder to your childless response would be "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names can never hurt me", but I dont [sic] think that's at all apposite. Billy the bard would much have preferred something which would vex thee far more, such as "It offends me to the soul to hear a robustious periwig pated fellow tear a passion to tatters, to very rags", or Thou qualling tallow-faced wrinkled-witch!, or Thou unwholesome fool-born coxcomb! ... but enough, I tire of thee, tiresome bonker, speaker of that referred to by the immortal bard as:

This royal throne of kings, this scepter'd isle,

This earth of majesty, this seat of Mars,

This other Eden, demi-paradise,

This fortress built by Nature for herself

Against infection and the hand of war,

This happy breed of men, this little world,

This precious stone set in the silver sea,

Which serves it in the office of a wall,

Or as a moat defensive to a house,

Against the envy of less happier lands,

This blessed plot, this earth, this realm, this England...

or mayhap you are a person of Gaelic persuasion







Last edited by Senior Pilot; 25th Jul 2010 at 23:30. Reason: Delete PM quote
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Old 26th Jul 2010, 15:21
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Red face

My apology to SP for breaching forum etiquette and publishing a PM.

I believe I am a gentleman and thus, as Oscar Wilde would have it, I would never hurt anyone’s feelings unintentionally.
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