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Search: Posts Made By: Ascend Charlie
Showing results 1 to 35 of 74
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Forum: Military Aviation
5th May 2024, 00:54
Replies: 4,626
Views: 238,692
Posted By Ascend Charlie

(Man on left to man on right, sotto voce) "He...

(Man on left to man on right, sotto voce) "He thinks he is holding the microphone, but we switched it to the hand-held shower! Wait till he presses the bouton!"
Forum: Australia, New Zealand & the Pacific
25th Apr 2024, 02:50
Replies: 13
Views: 2,988
Posted By Ascend Charlie

It was always a hoot to go bopping up the main...

It was always a hoot to go bopping up the main street to the memorial gathering at 1100 in a Huey, making the Sound of Freedom.
Forum: The Pacific: General Aviation & Questions
24th Apr 2024, 19:00
Replies: 13
Views: 1,162
Posted By Ascend Charlie

I heard they were all in various Cash Converters...

I heard they were all in various Cash Converters stores...
Forum: The Pacific: General Aviation & Questions
24th Apr 2024, 05:28
Replies: 36
Views: 3,519
Posted By Ascend Charlie

Give us some warning next time, I didn't have a...

Give us some warning next time, I didn't have a chance to study for it.
Forum: The Pacific: General Aviation & Questions
6th Apr 2024, 23:49
Replies: 36
Views: 3,519
Posted By Ascend Charlie

Come on, this thread has drifted off topic...

Come on, this thread has drifted off topic already.

Here's a test question:
If it takes a yard and a half of calico to weave an elephant's underpants, how long will it take a double-breasted...
Forum: Rotorheads
26th Mar 2024, 05:49
Replies: 100
Views: 7,149
Posted By Ascend Charlie

A helicopter is LIKE a hummingbird, it can hover ...

A helicopter is LIKE a hummingbird, it can hover
A helicopter is LIKE an aeroplane, it can fly forwards
A helicopter is LIKE a person on rollerskates on an ice rink, it is somewhat unstable
A...
Forum: The Pacific: General Aviation & Questions
23rd Mar 2024, 11:19
Replies: 22
Views: 7,380
Posted By Ascend Charlie

I hadn't seen the video of that since it appeared...

I hadn't seen the video of that since it appeared on WIN 4 way back when. Sadly, the cameraman didn't have any stabilisation, and my B-model Huey was pretty bumpy trying to keep up with those two, so...
Forum: Rotorheads
19th Mar 2024, 22:37
Replies: 100
Views: 7,149
Posted By Ascend Charlie

The books use "precession" as a way of getting...

The books use "precession" as a way of getting stupid students to sort-of understand why the disc behaves the way it does.

The swash plate and links feed in a pitch angle to the blade. Blade's...
Forum: Australia, New Zealand & the Pacific
14th Mar 2024, 21:25
Replies: 227
Views: 102,212
Posted By Ascend Charlie

An obese airline pilot? Obviously not an Oz...

An obese airline pilot? Obviously not an Oz pilot, with all the medical conditions required to satisfy the Oz Chief DAME. All pilots are fine examples of the human physique.
Forum: The Pacific: General Aviation & Questions
9th Mar 2024, 21:24
Replies: 31
Views: 4,548
Posted By Ascend Charlie

Must have come from the Northern Hemisphere and...

Must have come from the Northern Hemisphere and didn't reset the AI.
Forum: The Pacific: General Aviation & Questions
8th Mar 2024, 05:53
Replies: 10
Views: 1,633
Posted By Ascend Charlie

​​​​​​​Can't even git the exxint right...

​​​​​​​Can't even git the exxint right...
Forum: Australia, New Zealand & the Pacific
7th Mar 2024, 10:43
Replies: 59
Views: 11,044
Posted By Ascend Charlie

The carrier I own for my scale-model dawg...

The carrier I own for my scale-model dawg wouldn't fit in the overhead rack, much less under the seat.
Forum: The Pacific: General Aviation & Questions
29th Feb 2024, 09:45
Replies: 32
Views: 5,306
Posted By Ascend Charlie

Jordan 776, who is also new to the forum, uses...

Jordan 776, who is also new to the forum, uses the same poor grammar and wording that MJet does - perhaps M whipped up a new name to write a glowing appraisal?
Forum: Rotorheads
22nd Feb 2024, 09:41
Replies: 4
Views: 1,023
Posted By Ascend Charlie

I was asked to fly a Huey over an Anzac Day...

I was asked to fly a Huey over an Anzac Day march. Afterwards, the vets came to me in tears of happiness, and all said it was a very moving experience to hear the "Sound of Freedom" bopping overhead...
Forum: Australia, New Zealand & the Pacific
9th Feb 2024, 00:41
Replies: 44
Views: 9,923
Posted By Ascend Charlie

It only gets serious when the employee applies to...

It only gets serious when the employee applies to a court to have the boss "cease and desist" after continued out-of-hours harassment. Otherwise, carry on as usual.
Forum: The Pacific: General Aviation & Questions
5th Feb 2024, 19:59
Replies: 11
Views: 2,087
Posted By Ascend Charlie

​​​​​​​Why do you want to advertise that you are...

​​​​​​​Why do you want to advertise that you are a substandard pilot?
Forum: The Pacific: General Aviation & Questions
25th Jan 2024, 03:37
Replies: 20
Views: 4,192
Posted By Ascend Charlie

A media blow-up.

A media blow-up.
Forum: Australia, New Zealand & the Pacific
13th Jan 2024, 06:52
Replies: 21
Views: 6,419
Posted By Ascend Charlie

Many times I flew a camera crew out to Buggery...

Many times I flew a camera crew out to Buggery Crack to film some politician with a spade and a toothy smile, turning "the first sod" for the runway. Stop cameras, put away the spade, cover up hole,...
Forum: Rotorheads
12th Jan 2024, 06:14
Replies: 21
Views: 1,930
Posted By Ascend Charlie

We had an original L, with the C-20 and water...

We had an original L, with the C-20 and water methanol. It worked really well, we acknowledged its limits and got 12,000 hours out of it, before a new owner put a junior pilot into it and he flew the...
Forum: Australia, New Zealand & the Pacific
11th Jan 2024, 20:24
Replies: 46
Views: 13,112
Posted By Ascend Charlie

A dysfunctional country on our doorstep, China...

A dysfunctional country on our doorstep, China would love to help out with a few navy ships sitting in Moresby. And update the airfields too, and better park some military planes on them because they...
Forum: Rotorheads
17th Dec 2023, 05:59
Replies: 58
Views: 8,330
Posted By Ascend Charlie

Being IFR won't help you get to a snowed-in...

Being IFR won't help you get to a snowed-in mountain top.

A brand-new pilot in a hot machine, loaded with heavy skiers and headed for a high mountain in crummy weather - I will read about it in...
Forum: The Pacific: General Aviation & Questions
4th Dec 2023, 20:02
Replies: 63
Views: 8,400
Posted By Ascend Charlie

The green men land, grab some Earthling, and say...

The green men land, grab some Earthling, and say "Take us to your leader!"

Where would you take them?

Not to Biden or Trump, not to Putin.

Maybe to Yung Fat Wun, and they would just...
Forum: The Pacific: General Aviation & Questions
23rd Nov 2023, 01:22
Replies: 409
Views: 112,444
Posted By Ascend Charlie

At the risk of heading for the sightboard, an...

At the risk of heading for the sightboard, an ejection seat story. I was the Airmanship lecturer at 2FTS at the time, giving a lesson on the Martin-Baker Departure Lounge.For the ejection seat...
Forum: The Pacific: General Aviation & Questions
22nd Nov 2023, 18:14
Replies: 409
Views: 112,444
Posted By Ascend Charlie

SPAZ, we had an interesting demo at 2FTS in 1978...

SPAZ, we had an interesting demo at 2FTS in 1978 when a test was done on this canopy breaking tool. An unserviceable canopy was due to be tossed, so a test was devised.

Leroy the Boy was kitted up...
Forum: Australia, New Zealand & the Pacific
18th Nov 2023, 21:57
Replies: 44
Views: 12,652
Posted By Ascend Charlie

Back in 2003, I was waiting at the eastern GA...

Back in 2003, I was waiting at the eastern GA area at KSA for the arrival of a Gulfstream from NZ, due to land at 2130. The main passenger was Tom Cruise, and the Customs and Immigration people were...
Forum: Military Aviation
13th Nov 2023, 06:22
Replies: 4,626
Views: 238,692
Posted By Ascend Charlie

"Send the base a telegram to say there's been an...

"Send the base a telegram to say there's been an accident!"
"Sorry, sir, the wires are down..."
Forum: Rotorheads
8th Nov 2023, 10:08
Replies: 179
Views: 63,923
Posted By Ascend Charlie

Don't forget that it's also a place for those who...

Don't forget that it's also a place for those who choose to be offended on behalf of other people.
Forum: Rotorheads
7th Nov 2023, 20:32
Replies: 179
Views: 63,923
Posted By Ascend Charlie

Q: What force is required to stop a propellor? ...

Q: What force is required to stop a propellor?
A: One Newton

Q: What is required to stop a propellor?
A: A strong arm, a good eye, and a lot of guts.

My friends were on night shift 2 hangars...
Forum: Rotorheads
7th Nov 2023, 20:28
Replies: 3
Views: 1,343
Posted By Ascend Charlie

Similar story to my brother, quit 30 years ago...

Similar story to my brother, quit 30 years ago but now has it. He's on a trial drug (the other 7 on the drug have died) but he is plugging along OK.

Remember the words of Yul Brynner:

"Whatever...
Forum: Rotorheads
22nd Oct 2023, 19:07
Replies: 12
Views: 1,782
Posted By Ascend Charlie

Hill Helicopters in UK?

Hill Helicopters in UK?
Forum: Rotorheads
5th Oct 2023, 20:41
Replies: 14
Views: 2,992
Posted By Ascend Charlie

Millpond surface, misjudged the height, dunked...

Millpond surface, misjudged the height, dunked the tail rotor, away it went. Shoulda chopped the throttle when it started to spin, but the excitement and unexpected action perhaps distracted...
Forum: Rotorheads
1st Oct 2023, 19:17
Replies: 1,632
Views: 446,815
Posted By Ascend Charlie

​​​​​​​Au contraire, Sassy, The doors on the 76...

​​​​​​​Au contraire, Sassy, The doors on the 76 had the satisfying "chunk" sound of a Lincoln Continental, and the door key (I heard) was from a Chevrolet.
Forum: Military Aviation
12th Sep 2023, 11:34
Replies: 210
Views: 48,944
Posted By Ascend Charlie

Well, what words are up for review? Airmanship ...

Well, what words are up for review?
Airmanship
Cockpit
Joystick
Male and female cannon plugs
Hangars and undercarriage can be construed as an oblique reference to the male anatomy
Flaps...
Forum: The Pacific: General Aviation & Questions
25th Aug 2023, 22:17
Replies: 365
Views: 54,306
Posted By Ascend Charlie

I had a student who was a highly-qualified lawyer...

I had a student who was a highly-qualified lawyer who wanted to learn to fly choppers. But he had big troubles retaining skills. He booked a slot one morning, and I saw his car arrive just in time. I...
Forum: The Pacific: General Aviation & Questions
25th Aug 2023, 02:39
Replies: 365
Views: 54,306
Posted By Ascend Charlie

One student came to our (civvy) flying school,...

One student came to our (civvy) flying school, having done 15 hours with That Other School, and told me he was ready for solo. He deposited $30,000 with us to cover ground school theory and the rest...
Showing results 1 to 35 of 74
 
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