Looking for answers please
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I too am a fearful flyer but over the years have got better. Every noise, bang fills me with fear (which always stays hidden). I also used to find myself constantly looking at the crew to see of there is any alarm/panic on their faces.
However as I have said it has certainly got better over the years. One thing that helped me tremendously was I purchased a couple of DVDs that show you the flight from the flight deck. I was totally amazed at what goes on before a flight, all the pre checks, the visual check the captain makes around the exterior of the aircraft etc. You get to hear and see the discussion and plans re aborted take offs and landings, discussions on airports the flight route will fly over if they need to land for say a pax emergency.
For a mere pax who knows very little at what goes on behind the scenes this was and is fascinating stuff and certainly helped me hugely with my fears.
Good luck
PS Thanks SloppyJoe for the excellent post and explanation.
However as I have said it has certainly got better over the years. One thing that helped me tremendously was I purchased a couple of DVDs that show you the flight from the flight deck. I was totally amazed at what goes on before a flight, all the pre checks, the visual check the captain makes around the exterior of the aircraft etc. You get to hear and see the discussion and plans re aborted take offs and landings, discussions on airports the flight route will fly over if they need to land for say a pax emergency.
For a mere pax who knows very little at what goes on behind the scenes this was and is fascinating stuff and certainly helped me hugely with my fears.
Good luck
PS Thanks SloppyJoe for the excellent post and explanation.
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1:1 Fear of Flying help
Fearfull Flyer, there is a great load of information and tips on this thread with (amazingly for PPRUNE!) sound advice from all contributors. (The professionals can be much more difficult in Rumours and News - don't believe everything you read there!).
I run, from time to time, ground based fear of flying courses in the Channel Islands and I have worked with a number of people 1:1 with considerable success. Since I used to suffer from fear of flying (or aerophobia as it is technically called) I do most of this work for free. I am keen to help others with this debilitating problem. I got over my difficulties by training as a pilot, but that is not to say my approach would be ideal for everyone. I do now sit in the back of airliners in a relaxed state and enjoy each flight. In fact, I even look forward to them now. You could get to that - but really just finding it boring is a good result!
The causes of the fear are important to establish. In my experience, they generally fall into one (occasionally two) of four categories:
- lack of knowledge/understanding;
- linked phobia (usually claustrophobia - interestingly fear of heights does not generally present for fearful flyers, but fear of falling does) These need a different approach to treatment;
- obsessive behaviour around aviation disaster stories (in the press and by word-of-mouth, sometimes even on here!) These are often wrong/misinformed;
- personal experience of an aviation incident (Note my use of the term incident. I actually have yet to meet someone who has actually experienced something that was really dangerous; just rare experience of the application by flight and cabin crew of well established procedures for handling in-flight issues of a quite minor nature. PAX often think they've been through a near death experience though!)
Good example on Yahoo today reporting a Quantas depressurization. No-one hurt; aircraft descended (albeit expedited by the flight crew) in the usual controlled way (using the autopilot controls I suspect), to the safe altitude at which pressure (oxygen content) doesn't matter; landed safely. Yes, it must have been rather unnerving for the passengers, probably uncomfortable on the ears, but an incident for which the crew train safely handled. Yahoo reported this as 'Passenger jet plunges xxxx feet'. It's wrong and it's scare-mongering. It made a controlled descent as it should have done. There are loads of examples of such awful, sensationalist and lazy reporting. I don't intend my comments here to sound dismissive, but in my experience, roughly 70 - 80% of reporting about air incidents is wrong.
My day job includes a certain amount of management psychology and, I have occasionally found looking at type preference and behavioural traits helps explain why people are, for example, more prone to panic than others.
Progressive exposure to the aviation environment often helps. I guess you are based near MAN, so speak to the people at the museum (near the airport) and see if they can let you sit in one or more aeroplanes for a while. Staying there until you feel bored is a good target. Go to the airport and just get used to sitting around in the terminal drinking tea or similar - until you find it really boring and the heart's stopped racing.
Please, above all, don't just blank it until a couple of weeks before your departure. It won't work and you really will probably end up cancelling or failing to board. Believe me, although you get initial relief, you'd feel angry and inadequate for months after. It's always better to attack this one proactively, but it can take several months to be successful.
Some find the 1 day fear of flying courses with a flight helpful, but I often wonder how many people find them too intense and what the psychological success rate is. I know people who have attended and now fly - still very nervously. On the other hand, a high profile person who was cured by one was Whoopee Goldberg - she learned something on one of those courses that addressed a specific fear and that answer got her flying again.
Someone mentioned the possibility of medication from your GP. They were correct. GPs usually prescribe Diazepam (or a drug from the Benzodiazepine group) although some use beta-blockers - which reduce the heart rate and can make you a bit sleepy.
I run, from time to time, ground based fear of flying courses in the Channel Islands and I have worked with a number of people 1:1 with considerable success. Since I used to suffer from fear of flying (or aerophobia as it is technically called) I do most of this work for free. I am keen to help others with this debilitating problem. I got over my difficulties by training as a pilot, but that is not to say my approach would be ideal for everyone. I do now sit in the back of airliners in a relaxed state and enjoy each flight. In fact, I even look forward to them now. You could get to that - but really just finding it boring is a good result!
The causes of the fear are important to establish. In my experience, they generally fall into one (occasionally two) of four categories:
- lack of knowledge/understanding;
- linked phobia (usually claustrophobia - interestingly fear of heights does not generally present for fearful flyers, but fear of falling does) These need a different approach to treatment;
- obsessive behaviour around aviation disaster stories (in the press and by word-of-mouth, sometimes even on here!) These are often wrong/misinformed;
- personal experience of an aviation incident (Note my use of the term incident. I actually have yet to meet someone who has actually experienced something that was really dangerous; just rare experience of the application by flight and cabin crew of well established procedures for handling in-flight issues of a quite minor nature. PAX often think they've been through a near death experience though!)
Good example on Yahoo today reporting a Quantas depressurization. No-one hurt; aircraft descended (albeit expedited by the flight crew) in the usual controlled way (using the autopilot controls I suspect), to the safe altitude at which pressure (oxygen content) doesn't matter; landed safely. Yes, it must have been rather unnerving for the passengers, probably uncomfortable on the ears, but an incident for which the crew train safely handled. Yahoo reported this as 'Passenger jet plunges xxxx feet'. It's wrong and it's scare-mongering. It made a controlled descent as it should have done. There are loads of examples of such awful, sensationalist and lazy reporting. I don't intend my comments here to sound dismissive, but in my experience, roughly 70 - 80% of reporting about air incidents is wrong.
My day job includes a certain amount of management psychology and, I have occasionally found looking at type preference and behavioural traits helps explain why people are, for example, more prone to panic than others.
Progressive exposure to the aviation environment often helps. I guess you are based near MAN, so speak to the people at the museum (near the airport) and see if they can let you sit in one or more aeroplanes for a while. Staying there until you feel bored is a good target. Go to the airport and just get used to sitting around in the terminal drinking tea or similar - until you find it really boring and the heart's stopped racing.
Please, above all, don't just blank it until a couple of weeks before your departure. It won't work and you really will probably end up cancelling or failing to board. Believe me, although you get initial relief, you'd feel angry and inadequate for months after. It's always better to attack this one proactively, but it can take several months to be successful.
Some find the 1 day fear of flying courses with a flight helpful, but I often wonder how many people find them too intense and what the psychological success rate is. I know people who have attended and now fly - still very nervously. On the other hand, a high profile person who was cured by one was Whoopee Goldberg - she learned something on one of those courses that addressed a specific fear and that answer got her flying again.
Someone mentioned the possibility of medication from your GP. They were correct. GPs usually prescribe Diazepam (or a drug from the Benzodiazepine group) although some use beta-blockers - which reduce the heart rate and can make you a bit sleepy.
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Wow thank you soooo much for that detailed reply and for taking the time to do it, very much appreciated, I love this site and so pleased I found it, I never thought when I first posted on here I would get any replies from people who actually knew what they were talking about, or any replies at all, cant tell you all how much yous have helped. Big thank you to sloppy joe for giving me all that info about what actually happens on an aircraft from take off to landing, I did used to think that once in the air the aircraft went into auto pilot and that the pilots just sat and chatted and wouldnt even notice if anything was wrong. I feel so much better about my flight now and im actually starting to look forward to it, although when the day comes i know i will still be nervous, but no where near as bad as i would have been with out all you fantastic people and your replies, thank you all soooo much Mwah xxxx
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Thank you for your reply very much appreciated, I know exactly what my fear is, its the fear of not being in control, putting mine and my families lifes in the hands of a pilot or an aircraft is a massive thing for me i know once we step on the aircraft and those doors are closed then thats it, im at the mercy of either the aircraft ( nothing mechanically going wrong ) or the pilot who i will have never met before in my life and trusting him with not only my own life but the life of my 8yr old daughter and my hubby. Im not a huge risk taker in life and usually need guarantees before i would commit to anything, but i have to say i feel so much more confident about the flight since speaking to people on here, they have managed to eliviate a lot of my fears, and cant thank everyone enoughxx
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Well Fearful Flyer, not being in control is another common one. You can train yourself out of it though by progressive exposure. When you go out in the car, get someone else to drive - and consciously try to relax and trust them. Likewise, you are not in control on trains (which I guess you go on without thinking).
Personally, even though I'm a qualified pilot, I now rather like sitting in the back, knowing the guys (or girls!) in the front have been through such rigorous training and checks that there is nothing I could do better. Standardisation is high in airlines. Most pilots have been instructors and, whilst I have flown with the occasional instructor I didn't get on with, I have never flown with one who couldn't fly very well indeed.
Try to get into non-flying situations where you are not in control and consciously get used to the idea. It should really help on the day.
Personally, even though I'm a qualified pilot, I now rather like sitting in the back, knowing the guys (or girls!) in the front have been through such rigorous training and checks that there is nothing I could do better. Standardisation is high in airlines. Most pilots have been instructors and, whilst I have flown with the occasional instructor I didn't get on with, I have never flown with one who couldn't fly very well indeed.
Try to get into non-flying situations where you are not in control and consciously get used to the idea. It should really help on the day.
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Sloppy Joe
Super explanation Joe, it really hits the spot. 
There was just one tiny point you forgot ...... 
The two whacking great thumps as the main gear drops to its longest extension as they are unloaded.
Most people, even the nervous ones, can handle the 'whirra-whirra-whirra ....... ........ whirra-whirra-whirrra-whirra of the lift devices cycling, but that .... THUMP!!THUMP!! just as the brute leaps into the air? 
That really gets them thinking something has fallen off.
No matter, you description was a gem.
I only ever flew in a Comet 4C when 'er indoors and I went on honeymoon - in 1972
- Dan Dare to Ibiza when Ibiza wasn't full of drunken clubbers. Although I was getting fairly used to Boeings with their donks hanging decently under the wings, I had never flown in an aeroplane where the injins were only three feet from my right foot. I was amazed at the number and variety of incidental noises a jet engine can make, apart from the obvious one. Scared me witless ...... and I'm an engineer!
There was just one tiny point you forgot ...... The two whacking great thumps as the main gear drops to its longest extension as they are unloaded.
Most people, even the nervous ones, can handle the 'whirra-whirra-whirra ....... ........ whirra-whirra-whirrra-whirra of the lift devices cycling, but that .... THUMP!!THUMP!! just as the brute leaps into the air? That really gets them thinking something has fallen off. No matter, you description was a gem.
I only ever flew in a Comet 4C when 'er indoors and I went on honeymoon - in 1972
- Dan Dare to Ibiza when Ibiza wasn't full of drunken clubbers. Although I was getting fairly used to Boeings with their donks hanging decently under the wings, I had never flown in an aeroplane where the injins were only three feet from my right foot. I was amazed at the number and variety of incidental noises a jet engine can make, apart from the obvious one. Scared me witless ...... and I'm an engineer!
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Me Again
Hello again everyone, well the time is getting closer to my flight and a few old worrys are starting to creep back up, although i feel a lot more relaxed about it than i did when i first posted here, just got one niggly question that i have to ask if no one minds, although to be honest i doubt anyone will be able to answer it as i doubt any pilot has ever experienced this situation before, but here goes anyway.
As some of you may know i am flying out to Murcia in the next few weeks, and as there has just been an earthquake there i have started to fret a little bit about that, i was just wondering if another earthquake was to strike whilst i was in Murcia would aircraft be stopped from coming in...? if an earthquake struck say the 2nd day or so at the begining of my holiday how long would aircrafts be stopped from coming into Murcia for our return flights home..?
Also on the extreme side of things if a tsunami was to occur in the meddetranean as we where leaving the country can an aeroplane be sucked down by it...? These are all realy extreme questions i know and fingers crossed there are no earthquakes or tsunamis of any sort at all, but it does put questions in my mind that no one can answer.
Much appreciate any replys
Thank you
As some of you may know i am flying out to Murcia in the next few weeks, and as there has just been an earthquake there i have started to fret a little bit about that, i was just wondering if another earthquake was to strike whilst i was in Murcia would aircraft be stopped from coming in...? if an earthquake struck say the 2nd day or so at the begining of my holiday how long would aircrafts be stopped from coming into Murcia for our return flights home..?
Also on the extreme side of things if a tsunami was to occur in the meddetranean as we where leaving the country can an aeroplane be sucked down by it...? These are all realy extreme questions i know and fingers crossed there are no earthquakes or tsunamis of any sort at all, but it does put questions in my mind that no one can answer.
Much appreciate any replys
Thank you
For God's sake - we live 20 miles from Lorca. Our house is fine. If you look at a map you will see that the airport at Murcia is at least 50 miles from Lorca.
How can a tsunami - which is basically an earth-quake at sea- possibly affect an aircraft flying 30,000 feet above it!!?
The most dangerous part of your journey is driving to the air-port, or, after arriving, eating the tapas without sufficient red wine!
Sooner or later we all die - flying to Spain will not significantly change your date of death!
How can a tsunami - which is basically an earth-quake at sea- possibly affect an aircraft flying 30,000 feet above it!!?
The most dangerous part of your journey is driving to the air-port, or, after arriving, eating the tapas without sufficient red wine!
Sooner or later we all die - flying to Spain will not significantly change your date of death!
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Me Again
Hello again everyone, well the time is getting closer to my flight and a few old worrys are starting to creep back up, although i feel a lot more relaxed about it than i did when i first posted here, just got one niggly question that i have to ask if no one minds, although to be honest i doubt anyone will be able to answer it as i doubt any pilot has ever experienced this situation before, but here goes anyway.
As some of you may know i am flying out to Murcia in the next few weeks, and as there has just been an earthquake there i have started to fret a little bit about that, i was just wondering if another earthquake was to strike whilst i was in Murcia would aircraft be stopped from coming in...? if an earthquake struck say the 2nd day or so at the begining of my holiday how long would aircrafts be stopped from coming into Murcia for our return flights home..?
Also on the extreme side of things if a tsunami was to occur in the meddetranean as we where leaving the country can an aeroplane be sucked down by it...? These are all realy extreme questions i know and fingers crossed there are no earthquakes or tsunamis of any sort at all, but it does put questions in my mind that no one can answer.
Much appreciate any replys
Thank you
Hello again everyone, well the time is getting closer to my flight and a few old worrys are starting to creep back up, although i feel a lot more relaxed about it than i did when i first posted here, just got one niggly question that i have to ask if no one minds, although to be honest i doubt anyone will be able to answer it as i doubt any pilot has ever experienced this situation before, but here goes anyway.
As some of you may know i am flying out to Murcia in the next few weeks, and as there has just been an earthquake there i have started to fret a little bit about that, i was just wondering if another earthquake was to strike whilst i was in Murcia would aircraft be stopped from coming in...? if an earthquake struck say the 2nd day or so at the begining of my holiday how long would aircrafts be stopped from coming into Murcia for our return flights home..?
Also on the extreme side of things if a tsunami was to occur in the meddetranean as we where leaving the country can an aeroplane be sucked down by it...? These are all realy extreme questions i know and fingers crossed there are no earthquakes or tsunamis of any sort at all, but it does put questions in my mind that no one can answer.
Much appreciate any replys
Thank you
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fearfull flyer,
Small earthquakes like the Murcia one happen all the time on the Iberian peninsula and they don't affect airport operations. It would take devastating earthquakes like the japanese one to close an airport, because then you could have significant damage in the airport's infrastructure (terminals, control tower, accesses, cracks on the runway).
An earthquake of the magnitude that happened in Japan is almost impossible around the Mediterranean basin smply because the type of tectonics working on both areas are different (so I read, I'm no expert). I don't understand your question about a tsunami sucking something, tsunamis don't work like that... have you seen images from the japanese one? In any case tsunamis of that magnitude can't occur in the Mediterranean.
It's a pity some people prefer to poke fun at questions from fearful people. You're not helpful. Fighting fear of flying can be a daunting process and it's better to ask as many questions than keeping doubts in, spiraling into uncontrolable fear. As someone once said, there's no stupid questions, only stupid answers.
Small earthquakes like the Murcia one happen all the time on the Iberian peninsula and they don't affect airport operations. It would take devastating earthquakes like the japanese one to close an airport, because then you could have significant damage in the airport's infrastructure (terminals, control tower, accesses, cracks on the runway).
An earthquake of the magnitude that happened in Japan is almost impossible around the Mediterranean basin smply because the type of tectonics working on both areas are different (so I read, I'm no expert). I don't understand your question about a tsunami sucking something, tsunamis don't work like that... have you seen images from the japanese one? In any case tsunamis of that magnitude can't occur in the Mediterranean.
It's a pity some people prefer to poke fun at questions from fearful people. You're not helpful. Fighting fear of flying can be a daunting process and it's better to ask as many questions than keeping doubts in, spiraling into uncontrolable fear. As someone once said, there's no stupid questions, only stupid answers.
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Earthquakes and Tsunamis
I think it's worth mentioning that whatever happens to the destination, the plane has enough fuel on board to divert to another destination.
Fearful Flyer, don't let your imagination run riot, there are a gazillion earthquakes every day, you just don't know it.
If you look at this link:
Earthquakes in the UK
Have you heard of any of these? Doubtful, they are just a normal natural occurrence and usually too small to be even felt, and barely measured. You only ever hear about the big ones, because they are sooooooooo rare.
You just need to remind yourself that similarly, every exception to normal flying is pretty well in the miniscule percentage.
Just look at the faces of everyone around you in the terminal, they have done it before, and they are relaxed and happy because they know it is the safest form of transport, even if it might not seem so.
I liken it to this: You have more chance of being killed by a Donkey than a Shark. Did you know that? Yet obviously, your brain would tell you otherwise.
Have a look at this:
Flightradar24.com - Live Flight Tracker!
All of these planes are in the air, if you open it later, some will have landed, more will have taken off. You might possibly be able to track the flight you are on and see it take off, fly and land, then come back again.
There are millions of happy customers on those flights. (and by the way it's not to scale, they are miles apart vertically and horizontally!).
When I'm getting cabin fever, I already have my next three flights booked, and I know I can go on that site, find my flight and say "in a couple of months time at this time of day, I will be looking down at India" or wherever I may be.
So go ahead, follow your flight for a few days and think of all of those happy holidaymakers, most of whom will be grinning like Cheshire cats because they know it's all worth it.
Once you've seen it do it a few dozen times, you'll realise that it will do it a few dozen more times after you've been on it. It's just a train that happens to fly in the air. With usually crap food if you're in economy. JUST like a train then.
Fearful Flyer, don't let your imagination run riot, there are a gazillion earthquakes every day, you just don't know it.
If you look at this link:
Earthquakes in the UK
Have you heard of any of these? Doubtful, they are just a normal natural occurrence and usually too small to be even felt, and barely measured. You only ever hear about the big ones, because they are sooooooooo rare.
You just need to remind yourself that similarly, every exception to normal flying is pretty well in the miniscule percentage.
Just look at the faces of everyone around you in the terminal, they have done it before, and they are relaxed and happy because they know it is the safest form of transport, even if it might not seem so.
I liken it to this: You have more chance of being killed by a Donkey than a Shark. Did you know that? Yet obviously, your brain would tell you otherwise.
Have a look at this:
Flightradar24.com - Live Flight Tracker!
All of these planes are in the air, if you open it later, some will have landed, more will have taken off. You might possibly be able to track the flight you are on and see it take off, fly and land, then come back again.
There are millions of happy customers on those flights. (and by the way it's not to scale, they are miles apart vertically and horizontally!).
When I'm getting cabin fever, I already have my next three flights booked, and I know I can go on that site, find my flight and say "in a couple of months time at this time of day, I will be looking down at India" or wherever I may be.
So go ahead, follow your flight for a few days and think of all of those happy holidaymakers, most of whom will be grinning like Cheshire cats because they know it's all worth it.
Once you've seen it do it a few dozen times, you'll realise that it will do it a few dozen more times after you've been on it. It's just a train that happens to fly in the air. With usually crap food if you're in economy. JUST like a train then.
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Quote Hampshire:
Just looking back in this post. Disagree. Sorry. 
Anyway, Fearfull Flier, have a great holiday I am sure that you will be fine.
Most pilots have been instructors and, ..... I have never flown with one who couldn't fly very well indeed
Anyway, Fearfull Flier, have a great holiday I am sure that you will be fine.
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I understand that the questions iv asked are extreme and not rational and the chances of it happening are remote, but being affraid of flying (or any kind of fear) tends to make you think unrationaly. which leads you to ask questions that many people wouldnt.
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I understand that the questions iv asked are extreme and not rational and the chances of it happening are remote, but being affraid of flying (or any kind of fear) tends to make you think unrationaly. which leads you to ask questions that many people wouldnt.
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I understand that the questions iv asked are extreme and not rational and the chances of it happening are remote, but being affraid of flying (or any kind of fear) tends to make you think unrationaly. which leads you to ask questions that many people wouldnt.
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Thank you
Thank you to Exascot, ChicoG, LurlkinginSTO, and wowzz for answering my question more positively.
I know it was a bit of an extreme question but one which was niggling at me, I had realy started to look forward to my hol and felt a lot calmer about the flight.
I dont think when the day comes i will be hopping and skipping my way onto the aircraft lol, but i will be a lot more calmer than i was before i joined this forum and had a lot of my fears and questions answered. When im on my way i will be thinking about all the great advice i have recieved from you guys and remembering what yous have said regarding diffrent engine noises etc.
There are so many places in the world i would love to visit but up to now because of my fear of flying when we do go abroad for a holiday i think more about how long the flight is to get there and try to choose a destination with the least flight time. My daughter on the other hand who is only 8 couldnt be more excited and the part she is looking forward to the most is the flight and has insisted on a window seat.
Hopefully all goes well and we can start to look forward to a holiday in the sun each year instead of the dreary wet holidays we have endured in england for the past few years lol.
Thanks again to you all
I know it was a bit of an extreme question but one which was niggling at me, I had realy started to look forward to my hol and felt a lot calmer about the flight.
I dont think when the day comes i will be hopping and skipping my way onto the aircraft lol, but i will be a lot more calmer than i was before i joined this forum and had a lot of my fears and questions answered. When im on my way i will be thinking about all the great advice i have recieved from you guys and remembering what yous have said regarding diffrent engine noises etc.
There are so many places in the world i would love to visit but up to now because of my fear of flying when we do go abroad for a holiday i think more about how long the flight is to get there and try to choose a destination with the least flight time. My daughter on the other hand who is only 8 couldnt be more excited and the part she is looking forward to the most is the flight and has insisted on a window seat.
Hopefully all goes well and we can start to look forward to a holiday in the sun each year instead of the dreary wet holidays we have endured in england for the past few years lol.
Thanks again to you all
