"We're thinking of re-naming it the Stannah Stairlift and getting that Thora Hird to advertise it. What do you think Sir?"

Milt is the brave pilot on the right of the picture.

That\'s not a caption, just a statement of fact.

'And as you can see, Sir, at the bottom is a grass cutting cylinder, this enables the pilot to cut his own runway. This keeps the bean counters happy, as we can save thousands of pounds per year.'

And if you look to the right of the control column it even has a soup heater.

caption
 

Milt:" Ah, yes Sir, now I`ve got my tri-focal Mk8s adjusted on my Cromwell Corker,I can see that stain on the seat. so I`m not going to tuck my trouser bottoms into my socks for the next test"

I kept telling Westlands - this doesn't really fit the requirements we discussed for the Lynx replacement.

Fancy a weekend in Prague ? :ok:

"Look sonny, come back in a few years when you've grown a little, and we'll let you have a go then..........now b*gger off out of the seat and let Bloggs here get on with it!"

..and sir, you can see that the balistic protection of these seats is far better than that on the old Puma..

http://www.flynavy.flyer.co.uk/miltspic003.jpg

"Dual use Sir - on completion of the sortie just stand behind it and it'll trim both your hair and your beard simultaneously."

or

" ... and the DLO have promised us a stopwatch and some semaphore flags to make us truly Network Centric .... "

The Staish admires the new powered golf trolley that MOD PE have sent him to trial.

The Riggers looked on horrified as they realised that someone was actually going to try and fly their entry into this year's Turner prize.

http://www.flynavy.flyer.co.uk/miltspic003.jpg

With 'Tonto' pushing up daisies and 'Silver' in the knackers yard the Lone Ranger decided to take a more modern approach to transport.

http://www.flynavy.flyer.co.uk/miltspic003.jpg

Salesman "For hot and high performance, we've reduced the weight by removing the right wheel"

"Note the ash-tray built into the right armrest. When you're in level flight, you'll be able to enjoy a Woodbine as you glide effortlessly above the traffic..."

--and, just to promote recycling --

"Pay attention, 007"

Senior officer "Were you able to load Prague into the nav data base?"

Senior officer to the assembled '.....fuel economy-good.....endurance-good. In flight facilities for taking a Michael Fish are borderline, but I think you need to re-think the arrangements for dispatching a Brad Pitt!!'

"Crikey....did he really eat that?"

"Yes, yes, very good," said Staish, "but will the damn thing mow the grass between the runways as I asked?"

"and you say we've ordered 232 of these things ... remind me, how does it fly again exactly?"

or

"do you know the helicopter is on my foot? You hum it son ... I'll play it"

I told 'em it wasn't safe Doc, I just reached back to put the carb heat on and the prop took my right hand clean off!