Mrs Bloggs 'At Home' Etiquette/Protocols
Avoid imitations
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Two's in,
Yes, because when the glass contains a drink, the C of G is above the pivot line.....
I can imagine said wearer bending forwards to introduce himself to a senior sitting guest...."Good afternoon, oh bugger, sorry, vicar!"
here is your chance to be the talk of the party by using this nifty little gadget...
I can imagine said wearer bending forwards to introduce himself to a senior sitting guest...."Good afternoon, oh bugger, sorry, vicar!"
No BEages, not those tights, rather smart tights with the broad gold stripe down the leg.
Known rather quaintly to our military friends as "overalls".
Jack
Known rather quaintly to our military friends as "overalls".
Jack
Hey Mr Tambourine Man
Another thought has come to me in the early hours of the morn'.
Perhaps Bloggs is not 'proper' Army, nor Royal Marines but SALVATION ARMY - what then? I only know the first verse of 'Jesus Wants Me For a Sunbeam' so can't help much here.
O-D
Perhaps Bloggs is not 'proper' Army, nor Royal Marines but SALVATION ARMY - what then? I only know the first verse of 'Jesus Wants Me For a Sunbeam' so can't help much here.
O-D
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This thread amply demonstrates just how far standards have slipped. There should be no discussion about plastic things and how to balance a plate and a glass.
A steward brings around the nibblies. End of.
One hand with drink, the other for meeting and greeting (or gesticulating if one is of foreign extraction) and occasionally eating when the steward comes around.
A steward brings around the nibblies. End of.
One hand with drink, the other for meeting and greeting (or gesticulating if one is of foreign extraction) and occasionally eating when the steward comes around.
siseman, the discussion centred on 'At Home' etiquette, not cocktail party etiquette.....
'Sky Mall' would appear to be something from the land of obese people who wear clothes made from old office carpets or turquoise crimplene. Thus it has nothing to offer in matters of etiquette.
'Sky Mall' would appear to be something from the land of obese people who wear clothes made from old office carpets or turquoise crimplene. Thus it has nothing to offer in matters of etiquette.
Possible Explanation
Goudie,
I think PN means you drink the stuff in the bottle and when it's empty you use it for .... Oh well never mind (it's a male aircrew thing).
O-D
I think PN means you drink the stuff in the bottle and when it's empty you use it for .... Oh well never mind (it's a male aircrew thing).
O-D
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Maybe the colonel in question is not army, marines or salvation army.
Perhaps he makes coated chicken!
In that case, a bootlace tie will be more appropriate than a bow tie.
Perhaps he makes coated chicken!
In that case, a bootlace tie will be more appropriate than a bow tie.
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the discussion centred on 'At Home' etiquette, not cocktail party etiquette.....
Gentleman Aviator
Perhaps Bloggs is not 'proper' Army, nor Royal Marines but SALVATION ARMY - what then?
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I think PN means you drink the stuff in the bottle and when it's empty you use it for .... Oh well never mind (it's a male aircrew thing).
As for the dual use bottle, there is one small drawback (unintentional pun there I think).... as a survival instructor said many moons ago (MALM East at Finningley, I think) - 'Drink 1 pint, **** one and a half', as has been proved true quite often, usually to the discomfort of the 'first timer'.
Perhaps a better option would be a colostomy bag - senior enough officers probably have them anyway, suitably 'blinged up' to quote the Armstrong and Miller RAF pilot's online manual.
Like MGD I have little experience of social occasions, being a mere SNCO - by definition a complete oik who doubtless would drink the 'Melon Balls in Creme De Menthe' and think 'those ice cubes were a bit squishy'. I look forward to the after action report (form Purple, at least for those in the kipper fleet), so that I may learn from my betters....
I hope the occasion goes well for the TO, and the result is NOT to be joe'd with every flower arranging event from now to doomsday - with any decent luck the Col. will be some sort of ex-hooligan with a fund of funny stories.
Dave
Just a small niggle ....
.... davejb.
You don't need to apologise. There's no such thing as a 'mere SNCO'.
You're as valued as the rest and don't forget it 'else I put you on a fizzer!!!!
You don't need to apologise. There's no such thing as a 'mere SNCO'.
You're as valued as the rest and don't forget it 'else I put you on a fizzer!!!!
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Thankyou,
I should have said 'ex SNCO', I are a mere skuleteecher these days.
SNCOs vary tremendously, as do the guys in every rank from AC to ACM. I was extremely good and helpful at times, extremely annoying and useless at others - to an extent this depended on who I was dealing with....
Like many SNCOs I was always absolutely sure that I was the equal of anyone I met, but I have to confess my social skills were (and perhaps still are) a bit inclined towards the Del Boy end of the scale - on one memorable evening at the Naval Attache's house in Athens, whilst attempting to be suave and sophisticated, I chatted to the lady of the house for quite some time before glancing down to see my tie well immersed in my horse's neck..... Some of us are born, frankly, to play out in real life the cornier scenes of a 1950's Carry On film....
Dave
I should have said 'ex SNCO', I are a mere skuleteecher these days.
SNCOs vary tremendously, as do the guys in every rank from AC to ACM. I was extremely good and helpful at times, extremely annoying and useless at others - to an extent this depended on who I was dealing with....
Like many SNCOs I was always absolutely sure that I was the equal of anyone I met, but I have to confess my social skills were (and perhaps still are) a bit inclined towards the Del Boy end of the scale - on one memorable evening at the Naval Attache's house in Athens, whilst attempting to be suave and sophisticated, I chatted to the lady of the house for quite some time before glancing down to see my tie well immersed in my horse's neck..... Some of us are born, frankly, to play out in real life the cornier scenes of a 1950's Carry On film....
Dave
I don't own this space under my name. I should have leased it while I still could
As for the dual use bottle, there is one small drawback (unintentional pun there I think).... as a survival instructor said many moons ago (MALM East at Finningley, I think) - 'Drink 1 pint, **** one and a half', as has been proved true quite often, usually to the discomfort of the 'first timer'.
DIRECTOR
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Musclemech
You quite clearly have not been paying attention. On no account do you turn up and ask for a red wine. The Colonel will immediately think you are totally unsuited to reside in this rural idyll. No No No.You ask for a large 25year Malt Whisky. It would help if you could reel off a few makes in order not to embarrass the Colonel on your first " at home" in case his cellar is somewhat limited.
On no account should you add lemonade just in case you were thinking of that.
If you require any help and further advice do not hesitate to ask as we ALL want this to be an experience you will never forget which will propel you into Hampshire society.
PS
Whilst writing this I am enjoying a glass of BRUICHLADDICH but I have to admit it is only 15 years old.
You quite clearly have not been paying attention. On no account do you turn up and ask for a red wine. The Colonel will immediately think you are totally unsuited to reside in this rural idyll. No No No.You ask for a large 25year Malt Whisky. It would help if you could reel off a few makes in order not to embarrass the Colonel on your first " at home" in case his cellar is somewhat limited.
On no account should you add lemonade just in case you were thinking of that.
If you require any help and further advice do not hesitate to ask as we ALL want this to be an experience you will never forget which will propel you into Hampshire society.
PS
Whilst writing this I am enjoying a glass of BRUICHLADDICH but I have to admit it is only 15 years old.
I don't own this space under my name. I should have leased it while I still could
Remember to keep off the beer before you go, pump ship, and try and hold on for an hour or so. The 'Colonel' may or may not have beer on offer. If he asks what you would like try and pick something that someone else is already drinking.
At one function in India I asked for a beer as it was hot and I wanted a bit more liquid. The delay became clear later when the guy got back from th shops having been out to buy the beer.
OTOH, in Cyprus, when we asked for wine (in a restaurant) they had to go to the supermarket to buy it.
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OTOH, in Cyprus, when we asked for wine (in a restaurant) they had to go to the supermarket to buy it.
(I assume that's why virtually everything in Cyprus was an 'acquired taste' that one developed after lengthy exposure). Duc De Nicosie champagne tasted like soda water, most of everything else tasted of resin, whilst the local whisky was suitable as a firelighting fluid. Oddly enough I could never make a decent brandy sour with 'normal' brandy, I eventually used up my duty free allowance on one trip to bring home a bottle of Keo brandy specifically so I could make a brandy sour that tasted just right.
One very wet and cold Christmas out there on a Nimdet that rather stretched beyond a joke (and well beyond our originally forecast return date) I bought a gallon of Keo brandy and started a BBQ party with the aid of a case of Coke from the mess, an oil drum and a few local trees - over several days various fellow celebrants donated more brandy and coke, and (occasionally) 'this tree that I just happened to find over by the zobs' transit block' so the party went on for quite a while.
It went on so long that, one rainy day, as the fire engine went past again (there had been quite a lot of that, our officers were a dreadful bunch who kept igniting things, getting into trouble, and generally letting the side down) and the staish followed it in his mini. He stopped at the roadside about 20 ft away and gave me what I thought was a rather cold look, frankly, considering it was the festive season and all, before driving off to follow the fire crew. Perhaps if I hadn't been so enthusiastically ramming his tree into the fiery oil drum he might have seen it in a more gentle light.
Dave