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Is this crazy??!!

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Is this crazy??!!

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Old 12th Nov 2003, 01:25
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Talking Is this crazy??!!

Great I thought as I tore open an unexpected pay statement, some extra dosh I wasn't expecting. Alas no.......a few months ago I filled in an ethnic monitoring questionaire and expected nothing back. Imagine then my utter pleasure and delight then, when my super wealthy and fantastically well resourced employer wrote to me to tell me I'm "British and White". Really clever to disguise it as a pay statement too.

I for one certainly think that's worth a second class stamp. I really hope all the other airmen, soldiers, sailors and civil servants get one too cause that's a real good use of hard earned taxes. I mean it's not as if we're cutting every major procurment project or giving everyone a long christmas break cause there's no money for fuel. If that was the case I'd be pretty angry...............Dohhhh!!!!

Are there any more total-waste-of-money-stories out there to brighten up my long winter evenings???
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Old 12th Nov 2003, 02:34
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We's got things like dat in Sefrica too. We calls dem mirrors...
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Old 12th Nov 2003, 03:08
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If we are really an equal opportunities employer then ethnic background is irrelevant - so why do they need to know.
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Old 12th Nov 2003, 04:42
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Danger I feel like an Ethnic

If you filled the ethnic form in and described yourself as "White - English" it was returned as 'No such ethnic group'.

I am NOT British, I am ENGLISH. But not according to the MoD.

BN, I fully agree with what you say.
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Old 12th Nov 2003, 16:58
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Tha's strange ZH. I put Scottish and it has come back with "White - Scottish!" Perhaps the MOD count us as an ethnic minority and not the English!
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Old 12th Nov 2003, 18:05
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Mine even better - filled in questionnaire ages ago as 'white - english'...

Pay statement-like envelope arrives and... no extra money this month - but apparently I'm Caribbean!

Now I know how the percentages are increasing - they're making it up!

Then I received my Equal Opportunities trg booklet. Then I received my questionnaire on whether or not I've witnessed discrimination. Working in a joint environment, my only correspondence with the RAF is their transmission of all this nonsense... oh, and the genuine pay statements, of course!
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Old 12th Nov 2003, 18:09
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ZH

That's strange too. I put 'White-English' too and am registered accordingly. I have the paper to prove it.

This whole ethnic monitering game is rot. I wholeheartedly concur with BNs thoughts on this.
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Old 12th Nov 2003, 18:11
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As usual, you are not allowed to be English.

There is never a box for "English" on a form - although Scots, Irish and Welsh usually get them. This nutty ethnic survey bears this out.

We don't have our own national anthem - we share the British one.

We don't get to celebrate St George's day - that is considered racist or triumphalist (but St Paddy's, David's and Andy's are OK).

If you ever describe yourself as English you are accused of being a racist/bigot.

Rugby - London Irish/Welsh/Scottish OK - but you try setting up "London English" and see what happens.

England football fan with a few beers inside him = hooligan. Scottish Footbal fan with same amount of beer = high spirited Celt.

Sorry if this sounds like a whinge/rant - but it pisses me off! I am English and bloody proud of it, just as Scots, Irish and Welsh people are of their nationality.

Can we have our parliament back, now that you each have one of your own? Thanks.
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Old 12th Nov 2003, 18:34
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Moggie:

Agree with most of your points.. I'm a Jock,

One small detail..

With reference to beer filled football fans, you missed the minor technicality that us Jocks refrain from going around turning quiet foreign villages into war zones, unlike our southern counterparts...

Oh and if you really want us to, we'll return those goalposts that we nicked in '77, that was a bit childish, I admit. The turf we nicked really did wonders for my lawn though
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Old 12th Nov 2003, 18:59
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Cool

Well I tried to put Jedi Knight, just as I did on the last census.
It came back as White British.

May the Farce be with ........
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Old 12th Nov 2003, 20:45
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Descend to....

Jedi Knight???? Come off it...you are more like a space cadet or space cowboy!!

Is there an ethnic group for white geordies?

CM

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Old 12th Nov 2003, 20:56
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Metman

The Scots don't want us.
The English don't want us.
Geordie & proud.

Lest face it - many of the shell-suit wearing charvers in the West End of Newcastle would not be able to tick the correct box!

Cushty!

www.newcastlestuff.com - funny for Geordies - baffling for anyone else!
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Old 12th Nov 2003, 21:01
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Snake Charmer
Presumably, now that the Politicos Correctos have declared that your are caribbean, you will be entitled to a daily rum ration ?
FEBA
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Old 12th Nov 2003, 22:01
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Well, the Scottish are Scottish 'cause they've got their own parliament - our English one is full of Scots, N Irish and Welsh so that must make us British - no?

The good news is that makes Blair British not English.
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Old 12th Nov 2003, 23:21
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FBA - have tried ordering 'gin and tonic old boy' in a fake Bob Marley accent with no joy, so perhaps you're right!
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Old 12th Nov 2003, 23:24
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Mr C,

Geordie is ok by me. On the ladder of life several rungs above an Englishman and just one below a Scot. Welcome in my home anytime.

Moggie,

No good whingeing here cos the English don't have their own anthem. Adopt one - as did the Scots,Irish and Welsh.
Just one thing. Wouldn't be singing about some Chariot cos the French are going to rip the wheels off it next weekend (hee hee).

Soddim,

Bliar may have been educated in Edinburgh but he is well and truly yours. English I think !!
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Old 13th Nov 2003, 03:51
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Well I consider myself to be White Lancastrian, is there a box for that?
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Old 13th Nov 2003, 04:01
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I agree with moggie. Whilst I have no gripe with the Scots, I get a little pi$$ed off with the little-Scotlander mentality and its financial consequences for those of us who don't live in Scotland.

Scotland gets its own separate BBC programming, continuity announcers etc. "Newsnight", an excellent news programme, that could never be accused of being England-centric, gets cut in half by some "Newsnight Scotland" parochial guff. All this, at extra expense to the 90% of TV licence payers who don't live in Scotland.

The cost of the new Scottish Parliament building is nudging the £400million mark, when the estimate was £40million. The average population of an English parliamentary constituency is 70,000, whilst in Scotland it's 55,000. Over-representation perhaps?

The population north of the Border has 33% more Government cash, per capita, spent on it, than do the English.

I could go on.

We should all be proud of our roots, but not to the point of excess. Please Scotland, give it a rest and stop wasting our money pumping up your ego.

Last edited by Scud-U-Like; 13th Nov 2003 at 06:11.
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Old 13th Nov 2003, 06:06
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Goodness gracious me.

My mother was born in India and my father in Birkenhead.

What am I?

Oh, I forgot, my Grandfather was born in Eire.

What am I?

At the time my Grandfather was born Eire was Ireland but is was part of the United Kingdom.

What am I?

Bloody certain that the whole thing is a bag of w*nk
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Old 13th Nov 2003, 17:19
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Bloody certain that the whole thing is a bag of w*nk
Tut, Tut, Pontius. Not very PC at all... but extremely accurate.
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