HK Divorce (Yikes!)
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Hong Kong
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HK Divorce (Yikes!)
Hi!
3 Kids + angry
missus. She is a career girl herself but I have contributed most of the assets. She is near going for the lot
. What are my chances in a HK court of getting half???? Thanks a lot for any help. By the way, her lawyers are MEAN.
3 Kids + angry
missus. She is a career girl herself but I have contributed most of the assets. She is near going for the lot. What are my chances in a HK court of getting half???? Thanks a lot for any help. By the way, her lawyers are MEAN.
Join Date: May 2004
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Try to get a settlement outside HK. Preferably in the country you both hail from. If she is angry now wait till the HK lawyers wind her up, which they are very, very good at. Best policy give her nearly everything for a clean break. Then get on with your life even though it means starting again.
Join Date: Jun 2007
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Well actually, get advice on that. Depending on which country you are living, or decide to settle the divorce in, you may find the Hong Kong deal is better. Generally speaking, under Hong Kong law, she will find it hard to get her hands on much that was acquired by you prior to the marriage. Without knowing many details (length of marriage etc), you are best to seek a couple of opinions in the various jurisdictions. Remember, quite often the only people who win in these situatios are the Lawyers themselves!
Join Date: Oct 2005
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Geez Jack.... 
I remember during my first day of induction, the good man who was showing us(my sim partner and I) around, told us something that I will NEVER forget whilst I am employed in HKG. His words were "Whichever way you came to Hong Kong, leave the same way. If you're married, leave married, if you're single, leave single...if you decide to get married, leave married, but whatever you do, do not get a divorce in Hong Kong, because the lawyers will get more than 50% for her and themselves".
It doesn't take someone of an Eisteinean IQ to understand what he was telling us....
Now, not to turn my 2 cents worth into a philosophical debate....I have been where you are at now albeit I don't have children. I did seek legal counseling, and it wasn't cheap as One would know....
What was my experience ? In the end, only the lawyers win mate, not you, not her, not your kids.
If there's any way you can salvage your marriage and work things out with your wife, it's worth it, not only from a financial perspective, but also having your children grow up with two parents, rather than one.
I won't elaborate any further, I am not in a position to preach a pious view - I am a son of a broken home (rare having come from a strict Mediterranean background), and to this very day I still wished my parents would have worked things out rather than continue to fight 15 years on.
Like I said, just my 2 cents worth to someone, having experienced both sides of the story.
I remember during my first day of induction, the good man who was showing us(my sim partner and I) around, told us something that I will NEVER forget whilst I am employed in HKG. His words were "Whichever way you came to Hong Kong, leave the same way. If you're married, leave married, if you're single, leave single...if you decide to get married, leave married, but whatever you do, do not get a divorce in Hong Kong, because the lawyers will get more than 50% for her and themselves".
It doesn't take someone of an Eisteinean IQ to understand what he was telling us....
Now, not to turn my 2 cents worth into a philosophical debate....I have been where you are at now albeit I don't have children. I did seek legal counseling, and it wasn't cheap as One would know....
What was my experience ? In the end, only the lawyers win mate, not you, not her, not your kids.
If there's any way you can salvage your marriage and work things out with your wife, it's worth it, not only from a financial perspective, but also having your children grow up with two parents, rather than one.
I won't elaborate any further, I am not in a position to preach a pious view - I am a son of a broken home (rare having come from a strict Mediterranean background), and to this very day I still wished my parents would have worked things out rather than continue to fight 15 years on.
Like I said, just my 2 cents worth to someone, having experienced both sides of the story.
Join Date: Jul 2007
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Sorry mate. Wrong forum. For everybody else. Use this as a warning. Make it simple. Dont get married (like me for many years!). When u feel the build up head down to Boracay or Neptune, there you will find a lot of real love. They will swallow and make no complaints afterwards, or at least they will not sue you and claim the assets you have build up.
Now if thats not the advice of the day I dont know.
Now if thats not the advice of the day I dont know.
Join Date: May 2003
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Ok,
You need to figure out where your domicile is before you can figure out where you are getting divorced. It isn't where you live, or where you work or where you were born or where you got married or where either of you filed for divorce first or where the kids were born. It is your domicile. The terms of separation in Hong Kong are different from Oz or plenty of other places so like I say, get domicile sorted first and if you both can't decide then the courts of the two countries you each went for for domicile will decide instead.
HOng Kong in relation to other places tends to be higher maintenance and "more even" asset split. Not always will 50-50 be seen as an even asset split when the court may actually look at all the factors and decide that 80-20 in her favour constitutes what is more accurate and fair. Duration of marriage determines how favourably the law looks upon assets you brought into the marriage remaining yours. They may say thet the sacrifices she made with having kids equal the sacrifices you made in relinquishing sole ownership of any assets.
If you can get it sorted out of court and possibly away from the lawyers (some or any of it) you save money. It's a catch 22, if you capitulate and don't argue over various assets you save money but you don't get the assets. It can end up being a sum zero game.
Importantly look after yourself. The last 10 years of statistics say you are 9 times more likely to commit suicide during divorce proceedings if you are male than if you are female.
If it's all getting too much and you need help then get it.
You need to figure out where your domicile is before you can figure out where you are getting divorced. It isn't where you live, or where you work or where you were born or where you got married or where either of you filed for divorce first or where the kids were born. It is your domicile. The terms of separation in Hong Kong are different from Oz or plenty of other places so like I say, get domicile sorted first and if you both can't decide then the courts of the two countries you each went for for domicile will decide instead.
HOng Kong in relation to other places tends to be higher maintenance and "more even" asset split. Not always will 50-50 be seen as an even asset split when the court may actually look at all the factors and decide that 80-20 in her favour constitutes what is more accurate and fair. Duration of marriage determines how favourably the law looks upon assets you brought into the marriage remaining yours. They may say thet the sacrifices she made with having kids equal the sacrifices you made in relinquishing sole ownership of any assets.
If you can get it sorted out of court and possibly away from the lawyers (some or any of it) you save money. It's a catch 22, if you capitulate and don't argue over various assets you save money but you don't get the assets. It can end up being a sum zero game.
Importantly look after yourself. The last 10 years of statistics say you are 9 times more likely to commit suicide during divorce proceedings if you are male than if you are female.
If it's all getting too much and you need help then get it.
Join Date: Sep 2007
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Jack, my ex was an alcoholic - you don't seem to notice these things when you live close to someone, three kids (youngest was 20), married for 31 years and looking back on it, I was walking in eggshells most of the time! To cut a long story short, without any hint or warning she brought her brother-in-law, his henchmen and a furniture van and they literally stripped the house whilst I was still there. It wasn't a case of 'Why didn't you stop it?'; 5 to 1 are not very good odds! So within hours, i was left with virtually an empty house and 34p in the bank.
Now about 7 years later, resettled in Bangkok - with my daughters' blessings - married to a lovely Thai women and life could not be better.
So, Jack, things may look very bleak now but I'm sure better times are coming. As my dear old dad used to say "Even if your belly touches the ground, keep your chin up!"
Now about 7 years later, resettled in Bangkok - with my daughters' blessings - married to a lovely Thai women and life could not be better.
So, Jack, things may look very bleak now but I'm sure better times are coming. As my dear old dad used to say "Even if your belly touches the ground, keep your chin up!"
Join Date: Oct 2006
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Fight One Battle Only
Jack, et al,
Just make sure that you fight one battle only. As an Expat, both you and your partner have the possibility of engaging in legal process within HKG and your other country of citizenship/domicile.
It goes like this; one party files in one country, the other party file in the other applicable country. Let's say its HKG and the UK. The first party files to stay the action in HKG, the second party files to stay the action in the UK. Both Courts consider that they have jurisdiction and deny the application to stay any action. Result; parallel legal proceedings in two different jusridictions, largely cross-purposes, double the costs.
Be aware that in some jurisdictions, e.g. AUS, a financial settlement can be extracted by the legal process without a divorce. If you're in this situation, ensure that the financial settlement is conditional on the subsequent divorce action being conducted in the same jurisdiction. That will at least avoid another swipe at financial issues by the other party.
At the end of the day, you need to secure your relationship with your children. Your divorce and financial settlement may not assist that task. Be ready, and engage legal advice.
M.
Just make sure that you fight one battle only. As an Expat, both you and your partner have the possibility of engaging in legal process within HKG and your other country of citizenship/domicile.
It goes like this; one party files in one country, the other party file in the other applicable country. Let's say its HKG and the UK. The first party files to stay the action in HKG, the second party files to stay the action in the UK. Both Courts consider that they have jurisdiction and deny the application to stay any action. Result; parallel legal proceedings in two different jusridictions, largely cross-purposes, double the costs.
Be aware that in some jurisdictions, e.g. AUS, a financial settlement can be extracted by the legal process without a divorce. If you're in this situation, ensure that the financial settlement is conditional on the subsequent divorce action being conducted in the same jurisdiction. That will at least avoid another swipe at financial issues by the other party.
At the end of the day, you need to secure your relationship with your children. Your divorce and financial settlement may not assist that task. Be ready, and engage legal advice.
M.
Join Date: May 2003
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Dragonfly, I'd be surprised if the legal systems in the two countries couldn't decide where domicile is since that's the key to deciding where the divorce takes place. There's nothing stopping you from filing in ten or twenty places but you need to get sorted as to where it is going to be rather than commencing proceedings in one place while she (or he) commences in another.
Bad as it gets, this needs to be sorted out. As does an interim plan for finances while in separation.
Bad as it gets, this needs to be sorted out. As does an interim plan for finances while in separation.
