Quotes from the flightdeck

[permFO]

ATC- "CZA are you happy if I get you to come inside Paula?"

CZA- " I would love to come inside Paula!"


Whenever we had a jumpseat passenger who sat in for landing I would always say when it all went quiet at the gate:
"Another life in the day of an airline pilot!"

[Saggi1]

Galaxy Flyer

My Apologies, I should know better than to identify you guys. However, this did occur, 'may I say, many moons ago' (8-10 years) at Richmond.
X-controller. And I must say the flying Yanks are very professional and always polite no matter the extra track miles they may get.
Post has been removed.
All the best Sir.

[KAPTAIN KREMIN]

Couldn't resist:

Citation/B206 pilot

"I'll make this airspace safer even if it kills them".

[Time Bomb Ted]

After a shocking landing by the F/O that turned the cabin into a "Rubber Jungle".

Capt:"Get on the PA and apologise for that landing you idiot!"

F/O:"Ladies and Gentleman, the Captain has asked me to apologise for that last landing. Thank you."


What a ripper.

TBT

[E.P.]

In the good 'ol days............

After the push-back;

From the "unbelievely acceptable" FEMALE lame; "Park brakes."

From the Capt.;"Brakes parked........and err, thanks that was an excellent tug!!"

Oh dear!!!

Nuthery from those days...........

Little thang serving the Capt his meal. She does so and then notices something missing from the tray..............

Capt;" Thanks, this looks great."

Little thang;" Oh hang on, I will just grab your nuggets"

Capt;" Oh okay. Would you like the F/O to wait outside?"

Heh, heh. I laughed for days.

[Monkey Magic]

E.P.,

Hilarious!

Thanks for a good laugh

[gissmonkey]

Captain: YOU HAVE CONTROL

FO: REGAINING CONTROL

[Monkey Magic]

A Tiger Moth is asked to hold at the runway while a B747 lands. The 747 lands, rolls out and begins to depart the runway. When taxying past the holding point the 747 Captain gets on the radio and says to the Tiger Moth pilot;
"Thats a cute little plane you have there, did you make it yourself?" followed by laughter.
The Tiger Moth pilot (our hero) replies;
"Yeah I made it out of 747 parts. If you make another landing like that I'll be able to make a second!"

[Boomerang]

737 to a 172 on 5 mile final (with headwinds), "What are you in? A rowboat?"
172 pilot, "At least I own mine"

Rumored:
BA146 on long final gets cut off by muster pilot flying extremely tight circuit...
146,"Gee, you're a bit of a cowboy aren't ya?"
172, (with appropriate tune)"...and you can be my cowgirl"

[Taildragger]

Farcu ..... I think you will find that the PX Pilot actualy said "The fark&*4 thing is totally fark&*4 well Fark&*4 far&*ed.
I think his name was the mad Hungarian.

[Torres]

I heard the Pixie pilot actually said: "The f-----g Fokkers totally f----d!"

But which PNG personality coined the phrase: "The f-----g Fokkers chokka, Okka!" when off loading stand by passengers?

[logan]

Fa to Capt (thinking she had missed the seat belt sign comming of to let her out of her seat)

Fa "Capt have you dinged me yet?"

Capt "give me a chance I've only been at this base a week"

(ironically many months later.......)

[Fris B. Fairing]

Torres

Interesting exercise to track down the originator of "the Fokker's chokker ocker". I was led to believe that it originated at Eenie Weenie but I'm sure you heard it long before I did.

EWL any comment?

Cheers

[The Voice]

a zillionteen years ago .. YPDN HF International at dark o'clock and still well north if the Oz FIR by a thousand miles


DN DN QF 123 ...

QF 123 DN ..usual answer

him: thank god! a friendly voice, and no accent .. why are you not at home tucked up in bed ...

her: because I've been hanging around here waiting for you to call!!

simple, but hell I laughed .... he was only about 2.5 hours N of the bdry!!