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Search: Posts Made By: Rocket2
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3rd Oct 2014, 12:06
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

"Ok Nav start the clock running & give me a slow...

"Ok Nav start the clock running & give me a slow count"
"1 - 2 - 3"
"Ok Stop! We've been airborne longer than any F35"
1st Nov 2013, 10:33
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Another from my song sheet "Theres Klingons...

Another from my song sheet

"Theres Klingons on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow, Theres Klingons on the starboard bow Jim!"
29th Oct 2013, 13:10
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Ok crew - lets have the Airbus / Antonov A390...

Ok crew - lets have the Airbus / Antonov A390 pre-departure sing song;

18 smokey engines working on our wings, 18 smokey engines working on our wings & if one smokey engine accidentally quits...
25th Oct 2013, 12:13
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

"Yes I know helicopters can drop torpedos too...

"Yes I know helicopters can drop torpedos too Daddy - so can I - sorry Mummy!"

or

"Sorry Mummy, the waters gone somewhere & I thought I'd put my foot in the nearest plug hole"

or

"What do...
10th Oct 2013, 14:13
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Er your going to need more than that small tube...

Er your going to need more than that small tube of KY Jelly to get me out of here mate!

or

I can tell you this - now's not the right time to get an itchy bum!
7th Oct 2013, 11:50
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Hang on Uncle Sergeant, Cpl Jones has forgotten...

Hang on Uncle Sergeant, Cpl Jones has forgotten the meat pies
25th Sep 2013, 14:23
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Man holding the turret "Well I was told that if I...

Man holding the turret "Well I was told that if I volunteered for "special duties" I'd get the biggest blow job of my life!" :eek:
12th Sep 2013, 09:31
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

BWOS rep to man from the Ministry, "Look you said...

BWOS rep to man from the Ministry, "Look you said you wanted the new F35 flying suit to be bullet proof, you've got it. That'll be £10m please - oh plus another £150m to re-design the cockpit"
11th Sep 2013, 09:20
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Having received numerous complaints from Beagle...

Having received numerous complaints from Beagle regarding the indignity of having to pee into a rubber bladder, V-Force crews have been issued with packs of the new long range Tena-Man.
6th Sep 2013, 12:05
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

"You left the gas on again didn't you!"

"You left the gas on again didn't you!"
5th Sep 2013, 12:01
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

"Did you hear that loud crack Bloggs?" "No Sir"...

"Did you hear that loud crack Bloggs?"
"No Sir"
"Good man - carry on!"
4th Sep 2013, 12:22
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Bona mate - look fer @&$%s sake I said "Bona...

Bona mate - look fer @&$%s sake I said "Bona Mate" not ............!
30th Aug 2013, 09:18
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Absolutelty horrible, its perfect Fritz! Now...

Absolutelty horrible, its perfect Fritz! Now bottle the filthy stuff & sell it to the Brits as "Blue Nun" :E
29th Aug 2013, 12:23
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Nein Nein Nein my Heir, das Fuhrer ordered you to...

Nein Nein Nein my Heir, das Fuhrer ordered you to test the new product from Chanel, NOT taste the product from the Channel
12th Aug 2013, 12:58
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Gent on right to HRH "Listen Sir, for the last...

Gent on right to HRH "Listen Sir, for the last time, Mr. Whippy sells ice cream, not personnal services!!"
4th Jul 2013, 11:48
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Hair today, gone tomorrow

Hair today, gone tomorrow
9th May 2013, 13:54
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

We have a cunning plan Oh Magnificently Bloated...

We have a cunning plan Oh Magnificently Bloated One, when you flick this switch next Saturday a virus will be sent from this piece of electronic wizardry & our country's 100 year old singer, Tonny...
22nd Apr 2013, 12:01
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Hells Bells - first we find an old skeleton with...

Hells Bells - first we find an old skeleton with a bent spine & neck, now this! Do the same thing & bury it - no one'll ever find it.
10th Apr 2013, 12:10
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Forces guy thats pointing saying to his mate "...

Forces guy thats pointing saying to his mate " Whose gonna tell 'em that their rucksacks go on the other way round?"

or

Millibland was unimpressed when he asked if he should have a helmet &...
8th Apr 2013, 09:37
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

John Edgley's initial design for the new Optica...

John Edgley's initial design for the new Optica Mk VI seemed to be lacking in detail
19th Mar 2013, 13:26
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Bloke(?) on left "Whats that clack, clack,...

Bloke(?) on left "Whats that clack, clack, clacking sound Trace?" - "Dunno - sounds like me knicker elastic on a Friday night...." :yuk:
11th Mar 2013, 13:16
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Hands knees feet & toes, do her hair colours...

Hands knees feet & toes, do her hair colours match now everyone knows!
5th Mar 2013, 09:27
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Well thanks for the lift Shergar, the good news...

Well thanks for the lift Shergar, the good news is that the teckies will take a few minutes to put the wings back on the Tesco Express, the bad news is that you'll be on it!
20th Feb 2013, 12:19
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

From the letter to Scruggs Aircraft Design Co: ...

From the letter to Scruggs Aircraft Design Co:
Dear Scruggs - I specifically asked for a design with folding wings - NOT folded wings!
Yours faithfuly
I. M Not-Amused
20th Dec 2012, 09:33
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Sqaud! Eyes front! - I said FRONT Gunner Thomas ...

Sqaud! Eyes front! - I said FRONT Gunner Thomas

or

Maam if I may just confirm that your left one is slightly larger than the right...

or

Yes I have to move my hair away just like this...
18th Dec 2012, 09:28
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Fish, Fish I smell Fish!

Fish, Fish I smell Fish!
19th Nov 2012, 09:55
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Effing surgeons! Before the final bit of the sex...

Effing surgeons! Before the final bit of the sex change operation I asked for a big set of falsies to be implanted....!

or

DentureDude goes off on his first QRA
or
Flt Lt Esther Rantzen -...
22nd Oct 2012, 12:32
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

The new F35 Lightning III full motion flight...

The new F35 Lightning III full motion flight simulator is shown being put through its paces. The new Minister for Defence said at the inaugrial flight that the new training aid was to the highest...
10th Oct 2012, 15:03
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Under the terms of RAFAIR 2012/NOTACHANCE, BAe...

Under the terms of RAFAIR 2012/NOTACHANCE, BAe Systems demonstrates the versatility of their proposed BAe (HP)42 2014 MPA by operating the previously mothballed transporter from a remote location.
17th Sep 2012, 14:25
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

When Charles said he was off to shoot his load,...

When Charles said he was off to shoot his load, well a girl of my breeding is entitled to blush a little!
7th Aug 2012, 16:02
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

At a secret London bunker an unknown person is...

At a secret London bunker an unknown person is photographed as he prepares to press the remote cable cutter button to sabotage the American flag raising ceremony at the Olympics.
27th Jun 2012, 14:36
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Assembly of the first Nimrod MR5 wing spar...

Assembly of the first Nimrod MR5 wing spar commences under the BWOS latest PFIFU
13th Jun 2012, 09:24
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Solider K was stopped from shooting his load into...

Solider K was stopped from shooting his load into the local pussy
31st May 2012, 11:53
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Ahhhh - the smell of stale kippers - fair takes...

Ahhhh - the smell of stale kippers - fair takes me back to my youth!
12th Apr 2012, 12:28
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,868,437
Posted By Rocket2

Kim Ill Jong III knew his life was now on the...

Kim Ill Jong III knew his life was now on the line when told that part of his ballistic missile / satellite launcher (delete as appropriate) had killed a Panda!
Showing results 1 to 35 of 50
 


 
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