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Search: Posts Made By: nimbev
Showing results 1 to 35 of 77
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Forum: Military Aviation
16th Nov 2016, 21:10
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Yes, we're quite safe here. The Royal Navy don't...

Yes, we're quite safe here. The Royal Navy don't have any missiles any more ... come to think of it they don't have any ships either.
Forum: Military Aviation
16th Nov 2016, 21:06
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Algie invited me to a cocktail party on his yacht...

Algie invited me to a cocktail party on his yacht this afternoon - never landed on a boat before but first time for everything, what? Might be a thing of the future! Always was a bit of a...
Forum: Military Aviation
7th Apr 2015, 19:57
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

I don't care what you thought, the DZ is over...

I don't care what you thought, the DZ is over here.
Forum: Military Aviation
13th Mar 2015, 11:45
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

I don't care what the Aircrew Selection Centre...

I don't care what the Aircrew Selection Centre said, you're not intelligent enough to fly in the back seat... that's reserved for monkeys. Just be thankful you've been selected for pilot training.
Forum: Military Aviation
13th Mar 2015, 11:37
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

MOD came up with a novel way to raise the average...

MOD came up with a novel way to raise the average IQ of fast jet pilots.
Forum: Military Aviation
2nd Mar 2015, 16:58
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

When they are deflated we can get 250 in a single...

When they are deflated we can get 250 in a single C-17.... then Cameron will be able to claim that the RAF is capable of moving the whole of the EU Rapid Reaction Force just by itself. That should...
Forum: Military Aviation
24th Feb 2015, 22:31
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

It was all in one piece - honest. I just turned...

It was all in one piece - honest. I just turned my back for a moment and those bloody souvenir hunters must have climbed over the fence.
Forum: Military Aviation
18th Feb 2015, 08:13
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

When I specified wood trim for the interior of my...

When I specified wood trim for the interior of my presidential aircraft I was expecting Walnut, not chipboard.
Forum: Military Aviation
12th Feb 2015, 16:36
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Perhaps if I keep standing here with a silly grin...

Perhaps if I keep standing here with a silly grin on my face, nobody will ask me any embarrassing questions.
Forum: Military Aviation
29th Dec 2014, 22:16
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

The iron lung isnt working Doctor, he's gone all...

The iron lung isnt working Doctor, he's gone all blue ... what shall we do?

Dont just stand there girls, Emergency Plan Bravo, get your kit off and get inside with him and.......

Oh, Plan...
Forum: Military Aviation
25th Nov 2014, 16:30
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

The PPRuNe Hot Air Transporter Mk2. It takes 10...

The PPRuNe Hot Air Transporter Mk2. It takes 10 transporter loads to remove 1 day's worth of Hot Air generated by the Military Aviation Forum alone.
Forum: Military Aviation
7th Nov 2014, 14:56
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

The only way to disguise the Death Ray fitted to...

The only way to disguise the Death Ray fitted to the Mk10 Billion Dollar Man was to cover it with a false red nose and dress him as a clown.
Forum: Military Aviation
7th Nov 2014, 14:48
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

I know you asked for Seals, but I'm all the...

I know you asked for Seals, but I'm all the circus could spare.
Forum: Military Aviation
27th Oct 2014, 01:00
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Buster got worried when he overheard some...

Buster got worried when he overheard some Sicilian looking guys saying that the Godfather wanted another horse's head.
Forum: Military Aviation
25th Oct 2014, 10:14
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Having got one of the cheerleaders pregnant,...

Having got one of the cheerleaders pregnant, Buster had to find a way to get to the game without being recognised.
Forum: Military Aviation
23rd Oct 2014, 16:06
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

My word, that donkey appears to have a big dick! ...

My word, that donkey appears to have a big dick!





There is no connection between this and my previous post. ie I am not suggesting that Buster has a big ......
Forum: Military Aviation
23rd Oct 2014, 16:04
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Buster finds a way to get into the Inter-Services...

Buster finds a way to get into the Inter-Services game for free.
Forum: Military Aviation
15th Oct 2014, 12:05
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Remember that old Army recruiting advertisement -...

Remember that old Army recruiting advertisement - picture of a tank upside down in a ravine with the byline 'If you were an Army officer this could be your problem' ... well it is, and you are - so...
Forum: Military Aviation
3rd Oct 2014, 10:30
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

You're supposed to move the mud with your bombs -...

You're supposed to move the mud with your bombs - not the bl**dy aircraft. Mud Movers... Huh!
Forum: Military Aviation
29th Sep 2014, 22:28
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

How I'm supposed to sniff out explosives after...

How I'm supposed to sniff out explosives after being in that stinking chopper with those smelly pongos I just don't know.....
Forum: Military Aviation
29th Sep 2014, 22:14
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

This doesn't look like Cruft's main arena to...

This doesn't look like Cruft's main arena to me....
Forum: Military Aviation
29th Sep 2014, 10:21
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

I only got sent here because I crapped in the...

I only got sent here because I crapped in the Real Tennis court at Hampton Court Palace and Harry trod in it. What a dog's life.
Forum: Military Aviation
25th Sep 2014, 16:56
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Well the architect's drawings definitely show a...

Well the architect's drawings definitely show a slate roof and the bloody builders have used thatch - Jerry will just huff and puff and blow it all down.
Forum: Military Aviation
21st Sep 2014, 21:22
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

"Faster than a speeding bullet. More powerful...

"Faster than a speeding bullet. More powerful than a locomotive. Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound...It's Salmondman!
Forum: Military Aviation
21st Sep 2014, 20:57
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Oh My Gawd... it is a flying pig!!

Oh My Gawd... it is a flying pig!!
Forum: Military Aviation
18th Sep 2014, 18:13
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Just how the Scottish arrow swallowers manage to...

Just how the Scottish arrow swallowers manage to pass an arrow without the feathers going brown is a closely guarded secret.
Forum: Military Aviation
17th Sep 2014, 22:33
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

A group of YES supporters welcome the BBC's Nick...

A group of YES supporters welcome the BBC's Nick Robinson to Glasgow
Forum: Military Aviation
13th Sep 2014, 18:42
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Since a Danish Green Party MP took over as NATO...

Since a Danish Green Party MP took over as NATO Secretary General last year, there has been a radical revision of NATO's priorities in a move to appear less militaristic.
Forum: Military Aviation
9th Sep 2014, 21:24
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Some of the interior designs on these Home Make...

Some of the interior designs on these Home Make Over programmes are just getting too too much, Darling.
Forum: Military Aviation
6th Sep 2014, 20:02
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Quotation from the BNP user manual (Bionic...

Quotation from the BNP user manual (Bionic Nuclear Powered Shapeshifter) 'It is vital to maintain eye-to-eye contact. Should it be broken shoot the dog and run like hell. DoD absolves itself of any...
Forum: Military Aviation
4th Sep 2014, 10:08
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Now with your left hand you grab it by the...

Now with your left hand you grab it by the balls....
Forum: Military Aviation
1st Sep 2014, 22:13
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Those of you on my left have passed the course...

Those of you on my left have passed the course and are posted to Florida, those of you on my right have failed and will be transfered to the Free Scottish Air Force in Lossiemouth.
Forum: Military Aviation
31st Aug 2014, 19:25
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Good news is they are going to use our squadron's...

Good news is they are going to use our squadron's Lancs to make a movie called 'The Dambusters'. Bad news is you lot aren't going to be in it.
Forum: Military Aviation
30th Aug 2014, 20:40
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Right, now you have all been issued with your...

Right, now you have all been issued with your nice blue serge uniforms, you're all posted to Ceylon, so hand it all back in and get your khaki issue.
Forum: Military Aviation
28th Aug 2014, 00:03
Replies: 58,121
Views: 10,946,544
Posted By nimbev

Why is this thing called a brace, I thought that...

Why is this thing called a brace, I thought that meant a pair of pheasants.
Showing results 1 to 35 of 77
 
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