" I've looked at the MEL, it doesnt say anything about a missing tail rotor, or main blades"

MADY

"I told you that making rotorblades out of the same material they make hangar doors from was a bad idea but you wouldn't listen"

“Well Mr Hog, on this occasion I’m afraid you’ve been unsuccessful on completing your flight test… Nice take off though“.

I want a white gentex flight helmet to match my socks, look !!

The Winner is.......
 

Several very good posts but the one that tickled me the most......was the one by Shytorque.....and I hand the tiller to him!:D

As if anyone kneels for a helicopter pilot!!!

Guy in the pink shirt....

"I say Nigel.....you reckon that would work on pilots to get them to fly?

Prunella was wondering whether she should have given in to her daughter's demand to buy the biggest helium balloon at the state fair.

..and it was at this moment sigrid knew she shouldn't have volunteered herself to help the ringmaster....:eek:

This electronic cattle prod is more powerful than i thought !!

The horse spooked when I landed over there? What horse? :rolleyes:

MADY

Prunella: "WOW! No wonder 'Equine Medicine for Dummies' says to warm and grease the thermometer first!"

During the unicorn's annual vacation, Charlie made his bid for stardom.

Fly by wire ?

See ... I can fly ......!!!
.... now please stop telling me a I am a pig ...!!!

Now THAT'S what I call a fart!

"you Were Warned Not To Brush The Hair On His Bo---cks!"

read your policy and procedure manual, you guys!!! horseplay is strictly forbidden!!!! :=:}:}:}

Whoa
 

Gives a whole new meaning to the phrase 'Horse Float'
I gotta start cutting back on those turnips!!:eek:

It was going so well until the Chinook flew over!

Summoning my best Eddie Murphy voice impression...

"That's right fools, I'm a flying AND talking donkey!"

Since Shy Torgue seems to be busy chasing flying horses or being trained by Brunhilla.....I'll call this one a Tie as there were several excellent responses.

In keeping with the original thought of the thread.....that being Helicopter UH-OH's!

Let's try this one.

http://www.flightglobal.com/assets/g...px?ItemID=9953

With regards to the 500E and the hangar door I won't say where it happened or to whom, but if I remember correctly it went something like this:
Aircraft had just been completley overhauled, so was basically 'new' again. On the run up to do track and balance the collective was either raised slightly or was mis-rigged so that when full rpm was reached the aircraft was just light on the skids enough to move. And she did.

Two mechanics and pilot got away with minor cuts and bruises. The pilot was not wearing his seatbelt for the ground run and was thrown out and got pinned between the skid and the hangar door - very lucky not to have been seriously hurt. Always belt up!

shopping list, my first thought
 

Damn, ok quick, think, think. Bloggs, make a Bunnings Hardware list, quick before the boss sees us. 4 main rotor blades, windscreen wipers, touch up paint, oh don't forget the cut and polish. Anything you think we need?

:ok:

"CAV troopers.....we got to get them over the idea of using their steeds for cover from hostile fire!

Any one seen the FM shut down page

The Canadian defence minister visits an American Surplus aircraft boneyard

"As you can see Mr MacKay this one is a bit of a fixer upper but it is one of the few we have in your price range"

"The pilot says it happened right after he was spooked by a flying horse".

P.S. Sorry for not being in time to judge the captions to my photo - I had a life to lead the last few days. :ouch:

Quiet. What did that helmet say?

Ssshhhhh.

Let's get the parts all together and try to put it together again

Valet parking, never trust it.

Geez, what are we going to tell the boss. We can't tell him we hit the sand dune because we were making fun of the cops in the 47 parked on the side of the road when we rear ended a horse sending it flying into a 500! :sad:

"oh Hell The Sloping Ground Limit Of 90 Degrees Must Have Been A Typo In The Manual"

Spot Autorotations
 

"I'd say thats within 5 feet of the spot wouldn't you Bill?"

HF

OK, who turned on their cellphone?

"What is this 'dynamic rollover' of which you speak?"

The last words on the CVR were "Head stay with me.....feet don't let me down!"

Free helicopter kit with every packet of Shreddies

Checklist miss read
 

I know it said "Turn over" on the checklist. But I'm sure it meant the page though...:ok:

I said very clearly that YOU HAD CONTROL !