MPA bars
C130 Techie, yes, at one stage that Queen Vic was well run and achieved precisely what you describe. Regrettably, however, that was not always the case. It needed a bit of direction and a modicum of leadership from the 1312 SNCOs (with minimal input from the OC) - but it was looking pretty seedy the last time I saw it; things semed to be getting out of hand rather too often.
A shame really that it closed - when they ran an afternoon rugby match special by invitation only, the Vic team made a lot of money for the unit funds.
A shame really that it closed - when they ran an afternoon rugby match special by invitation only, the Vic team made a lot of money for the unit funds.
Gentleman Aviator
And the other advantage of all the other bars is that when I (I mean when my mate 
) was banned from the OM bar for a month by the Wing Commander (miscarriage of justice) then I (I mean my mate) could drink even more than normal ......
...... and as everyone had heard of said miscarriage, then I (all right, it was me, you guessed) didn't have to buy many drinks in the other bars either .........
) was banned from the OM bar for a month by the Wing Commander (miscarriage of justice) then I (I mean my mate) could drink even more than normal ............ and as everyone had heard of said miscarriage, then I (all right, it was me, you guessed) didn't have to buy many drinks in the other bars either .........
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Mr C Hinecap,
Ah, Shadeys. How could I have possibly forgotten that one!
BEags,
Whatever happened to variety being the spice of life? As Raytofclimb said, the unofficial bars ARE the only thing that keeps the island from becoming a prison.
Imagine having 4 months of drinking in the same cr4ppy, overpriced bar every night with no prospect of anything different. As if it's not like Groundhog Day as it is! The fact that there are different bars you can visit gives you an element of normality in your life. Would you be happy at home only ever being able to drink in one place?
And as for The Goose
How dare you sir!! The most dangerous thing there is the prospect of your eyes turning square from sitting so close to that ENORMOUS projection screen TV!!
Ah, Shadeys. How could I have possibly forgotten that one!
BEags,
Whatever happened to variety being the spice of life? As Raytofclimb said, the unofficial bars ARE the only thing that keeps the island from becoming a prison.
Imagine having 4 months of drinking in the same cr4ppy, overpriced bar every night with no prospect of anything different. As if it's not like Groundhog Day as it is! The fact that there are different bars you can visit gives you an element of normality in your life. Would you be happy at home only ever being able to drink in one place?
And as for The Goose
How dare you sir!! The most dangerous thing there is the prospect of your eyes turning square from sitting so close to that ENORMOUS projection screen TV!!
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Beagle
Wonders may never cease!
You are FOR closing the only things that stop 99% of people swinging by their issue shoelaces in their box rooms!
You need to get down to the fun vacuum and enjoy the mess bar on your own!
The rest of us will traipse around the base finding sheds with fun bars in them!
ROCK ON "THE GOOSE"!!! Invite only now I believe.
Guess you probably wouldnt get one with that anti-fun attitude.
Wonders may never cease!
You are FOR closing the only things that stop 99% of people swinging by their issue shoelaces in their box rooms!
You need to get down to the fun vacuum and enjoy the mess bar on your own!
The rest of us will traipse around the base finding sheds with fun bars in them!
ROCK ON "THE GOOSE"!!! Invite only now I believe.
Guess you probably wouldnt get one with that anti-fun attitude.
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To set the record straight, The Goose is not an unofficial bar. It is the crew room, or Lounge, of the 1435 Flt Aircrew. It doesn't serve beer.
It does however, have a stock of cans for off duty aircrew to drink. Interesting guests (soz Beagle) are invited to attend on an ad hoc basis and are allowed to be there under some strict rules.
Granted, others have spoilt it for the rest in the past.... hence the strict rules.
p.s. BEagle, why you call the Falkland Islands the Malvinas? Do you still call Iraq Mesopotamia?
It does however, have a stock of cans for off duty aircrew to drink. Interesting guests (soz Beagle) are invited to attend on an ad hoc basis and are allowed to be there under some strict rules.
Granted, others have spoilt it for the rest in the past.... hence the strict rules.
p.s. BEagle, why you call the Falkland Islands the Malvinas? Do you still call Iraq Mesopotamia?
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p.s. BEagle, why you call the Falkland Islands the Malvinas?
Now then...what was the name of the Catering bar that had a cracking quiz night on a (I think) Tuesday?
Packed out....smoke so thick you could cut it with a knife, and some very obscure questions, but IIRC a big pot for the winners, and some SERIOUS rivalry!!
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what was the name of the Catering bar
As regards the BEagle-Malvinas debacle, Heard BEags reasons/excuses before, however, I still think personally that he is slightly out of order to insist on referring to the islands as the Malvinas.
I'm sure that the families of the 255 Britons who died ensuring that the Falkland Islands remained named as such would agree with me also
(Climbs off soapbox)
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.... malvinas.....really beags....they used to hang people like you!
Scrap the goose.....what a party pooper! - long gone are the days of the blah jet mob, most of the antics you refer to happened bloody years ago!
Begs the question though - at what stage in ones air force career does one turn from being a good lad into a dour old killjoy?
I've had the privilidge to hear some great stories on this forum - many of which were from you beags!! Does us a favour, just remember what it was like when you were one of those young whipper snappers and try not to spoil what little fun is left in this air force for the rest of us!!
Ps
Begs the question - serving members of Her Majestys' finest get issued phone cards on det - currently 15mins a week i think. How does that compare to the allowance for those detained at Her Majestys' pleasue??
Scrap the goose.....what a party pooper! - long gone are the days of the blah jet mob, most of the antics you refer to happened bloody years ago!
Begs the question though - at what stage in ones air force career does one turn from being a good lad into a dour old killjoy?
I've had the privilidge to hear some great stories on this forum - many of which were from you beags!! Does us a favour, just remember what it was like when you were one of those young whipper snappers and try not to spoil what little fun is left in this air force for the rest of us!!
Ps
Begs the question - serving members of Her Majestys' finest get issued phone cards on det - currently 15mins a week i think. How does that compare to the allowance for those detained at Her Majestys' pleasue??
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20 mins actually, but still next to useless. There are only two places on this planet that I have visited and been unable to get a mobile phone signal - one of those is the Falklands, the other is my kitchen!
BEags, you are not going to win this argument. I fully agree that mess dress regs are a pain in the arse, and that the nature of the place demands some after-hours drinking if one is to remain sane. Having said that, the Goose is STILL a pain in the arse, and populated by arrogant fag-chariot drivers / passengers (who invite you to their bar and then proceed to spend the next 2 hours either ignoring you or telling you how great they are and how insignificant you are in comparison). Do you think the fact that the Goose survived the 'bar cull' has anything to do with who provides the heirarchy in MPA? The Vic was a far superior boozer, and was far enough from those who wished / needed to sleep as to not cause disturbance. It DID however, as timmy's does now to an extent, rely on somebody laying on transport.
However, I'm hardly surprised at your views, being a (former) obsolete-airliner-driver - your days there will have been spent on permanent Q, thereby not giving a **** WHAT bars were open. As others here have suggested, have a thought for your fellow man!
Castaways still has potential, if only it could stock a better range of imbibements than the current 'yellow / brown / red / go thirsty' options. Timmy's has now re-opened as an 'official' bar of sorts - and as with the Vic, it isn't right next door to / directly above some poor sod that might want to get some sleep as they've got an 0230 report for a south sandwich run - something the Goose is routinely guilty of.
The Chard is still alive and well, but as is typical with the Army, you can't have a drink there with your entire crew as it's an Officer's only affair, and there's a dress code, leaving opening times as the only advantage over the mess. There is a HUGE market gap at the moment, which could be filled with a bit of imagination from 1312flt (the ONLY aircrew unit that currently do NOT have a bar/ large crewroom facility in the block). You need the following, IMHO:
1: Bar needs to be within walking distance of accomodation.
2: Bar needs to be isolated from main accomodation areas, so as not to attract criticism / complaints from those who NEED to go to bed!
3: Bar needs to stock a FULL range of drinks, not just a fridge full of cans.
4. Bar needs to be invite only, to avoid gate crashing by squaddies after hours.
A couple of portakabins out the back of 'Albert Hall' maybe?
16B
BEags, you are not going to win this argument. I fully agree that mess dress regs are a pain in the arse, and that the nature of the place demands some after-hours drinking if one is to remain sane. Having said that, the Goose is STILL a pain in the arse, and populated by arrogant fag-chariot drivers / passengers (who invite you to their bar and then proceed to spend the next 2 hours either ignoring you or telling you how great they are and how insignificant you are in comparison). Do you think the fact that the Goose survived the 'bar cull' has anything to do with who provides the heirarchy in MPA? The Vic was a far superior boozer, and was far enough from those who wished / needed to sleep as to not cause disturbance. It DID however, as timmy's does now to an extent, rely on somebody laying on transport.
However, I'm hardly surprised at your views, being a (former) obsolete-airliner-driver - your days there will have been spent on permanent Q, thereby not giving a **** WHAT bars were open. As others here have suggested, have a thought for your fellow man!
Castaways still has potential, if only it could stock a better range of imbibements than the current 'yellow / brown / red / go thirsty' options. Timmy's has now re-opened as an 'official' bar of sorts - and as with the Vic, it isn't right next door to / directly above some poor sod that might want to get some sleep as they've got an 0230 report for a south sandwich run - something the Goose is routinely guilty of.
The Chard is still alive and well, but as is typical with the Army, you can't have a drink there with your entire crew as it's an Officer's only affair, and there's a dress code, leaving opening times as the only advantage over the mess. There is a HUGE market gap at the moment, which could be filled with a bit of imagination from 1312flt (the ONLY aircrew unit that currently do NOT have a bar/ large crewroom facility in the block). You need the following, IMHO:
1: Bar needs to be within walking distance of accomodation.
2: Bar needs to be isolated from main accomodation areas, so as not to attract criticism / complaints from those who NEED to go to bed!
3: Bar needs to stock a FULL range of drinks, not just a fridge full of cans.
4. Bar needs to be invite only, to avoid gate crashing by squaddies after hours.
A couple of portakabins out the back of 'Albert Hall' maybe?
16B
16B, your description of the 'Goose' is pretty much as I remember it....
The idea that "...the nature of the place demands some after-hours drinking if one is to remain sane." would doubtless raise a few eyebrows in certain quarters. I don't agree that it 'demands' after-hours drinking; however, I do agree that if the messes and official 'pubs' don't meet your needs, then some reasonable alternative should be available.
A 'New Vic' as you describe would seem a good idea. But as an ex-inmate of the 1312 facility, I was always of the view that the Flt should be out of bounds to the Vic's patrons.
However, as a "(former) obsolete-airliner-driver", my days were not exclusively as a member of 1312 "spent on permanent Q, thereby not giving a **** WHAT bars were open." So I do have some sympathy - but the chief fault lay with the mess regulations which drove people underground.
Anway, no doubt much to the relief of many, I shall leave any further comment to those unfortunates who still have to spend their lives thousands of miles away defending the Bennies from the clear and present threat posed by the Argentine hordes some 23 years after the war ended.....
Of course there is such a threat, isnt't there......?
The idea that "...the nature of the place demands some after-hours drinking if one is to remain sane." would doubtless raise a few eyebrows in certain quarters. I don't agree that it 'demands' after-hours drinking; however, I do agree that if the messes and official 'pubs' don't meet your needs, then some reasonable alternative should be available.
A 'New Vic' as you describe would seem a good idea. But as an ex-inmate of the 1312 facility, I was always of the view that the Flt should be out of bounds to the Vic's patrons.
However, as a "(former) obsolete-airliner-driver", my days were not exclusively as a member of 1312 "spent on permanent Q, thereby not giving a **** WHAT bars were open." So I do have some sympathy - but the chief fault lay with the mess regulations which drove people underground.
Anway, no doubt much to the relief of many, I shall leave any further comment to those unfortunates who still have to spend their lives thousands of miles away defending the Bennies from the clear and present threat posed by the Argentine hordes some 23 years after the war ended.....
Of course there is such a threat, isnt't there......?
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Musing on the subject of non-Mess bars in locations such as MPA:
As a humble ground-dweller, it is my fantastic fortune to be designated as OC 'something'. This is so fantastic because it means I usually have 'people' as part of the 'something'. The funny thing is, those 'people' are not of my rank. This strange set of circumstances is what most of the RAF runs under.
Having non-Mess bars is vital to the morale of the Forces. I really like the people I work with and want to have a beer with them at times. Granted, the MPA drinking culture is OTT, but I can't change that from here.
Normal service will be resumed as soon as possible.
As a humble ground-dweller, it is my fantastic fortune to be designated as OC 'something'. This is so fantastic because it means I usually have 'people' as part of the 'something'. The funny thing is, those 'people' are not of my rank. This strange set of circumstances is what most of the RAF runs under.
Having non-Mess bars is vital to the morale of the Forces. I really like the people I work with and want to have a beer with them at times. Granted, the MPA drinking culture is OTT, but I can't change that from here.
Normal service will be resumed as soon as possible.
BEags, of course there is no such threat.... but I think the real reasons for our continued spending on those godforsaken islands are starting to become more well known
Oil!
Oil!
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Its not so many years ago (or is it?) that there were 2 tanker crews doing alternate 24 hour shifts on Q. The off-duty crew could then "enjoy" the various bars - which was probably the regime in force for most Beagles time at MPA. I didn't mind the Goose at all, because whenever we were over that side of the airfield it meant we were off-duty until 1600 the next day and could be as pissed as the next man.
Much prefer it the current way though. I'd rather get the det over with quickly instead of double the pain for the sake of a cumulative couple of weeks with nothing to do in the tropical paradise. Plus South America is only a phone call and 3 hours flying away
Shame about the Vic though.
At least the management down there haven't imposed a two-can rule in order to keep their "operational
" theatre in line with slightly sandier (and actually operational) places.
16 B - Obsolete equipment banter?? Even Typhoon gets that!
The VC10 may be an obsolete airliner but the MPA frame now represents a worringly high proportion of total tanker fleet.
Solution - stick AAR pods on some C130s and then one crew and frame can do QRA, routine AAR, MRR, Comp A, South Georgia recce etc. As a bonus the frames in the UK can then be used for Helo AAR. Now which Herc shall we use - J or K? Of course according to different LYE sources one is obsolete and one is rubbish......
Much prefer it the current way though. I'd rather get the det over with quickly instead of double the pain for the sake of a cumulative couple of weeks with nothing to do in the tropical paradise. Plus South America is only a phone call and 3 hours flying away
Shame about the Vic though.At least the management down there haven't imposed a two-can rule in order to keep their "operational
" theatre in line with slightly sandier (and actually operational) places.16 B - Obsolete equipment banter?? Even Typhoon gets that!
The VC10 may be an obsolete airliner but the MPA frame now represents a worringly high proportion of total tanker fleet.
Solution - stick AAR pods on some C130s and then one crew and frame can do QRA, routine AAR, MRR, Comp A, South Georgia recce etc. As a bonus the frames in the UK can then be used for Helo AAR. Now which Herc shall we use - J or K? Of course according to different LYE sources one is obsolete and one is rubbish......
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Solution - stick AAR pods on some C130s and then one crew and frame can do QRA, routine AAR, MRR, Comp A, South Georgia recce etc.
You'll have to wait for the A400 for a 'tactical' AAR asset....
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I think the excessive fatigue on the Albert tankers was caused by the HDU and extra fuel tanks hurriedly bolted into the Cargo Bay, coupled with some years of operating at Max MOS weights in order to sustain the Falklands airbridge. A short bodied C130 with 2 wing pods and no extra fuel tanks (except perhaps Aux tanks underwing for a J) would easily have enough off-load for routine Falklands Air Defence purposes. Mind you, so would a buddy pod, or just putting the F3s into Lima fit.
We shouldn't be talking about the damn place anyway. Its like old lags swapping prison stories after they've been released.
Hello to everyone currently "inside"
We shouldn't be talking about the damn place anyway. Its like old lags swapping prison stories after they've been released.
Hello to everyone currently "inside"
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Brain Potter
A short bodied C130 with 2 wing pods and no extra fuel tanks (except perhaps Aux tanks underwing for a J) would easily have enough off-load for routine Falklands Air Defence purposes
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I have to give all those MPA bars a I went down there twice, made some exceptionally good mates across the service divide, percy and crab. Don't think I could have named more than one or two of the bars although I stumbled into most. I hate drinking out of cans now but it was Dinger of 1312 and his gin that destroyed the most cells. Ah - strangely happy days!
Found myself horse trekking in the Andes a while ago and my guide's father was a regular on the other side at the time of the punch up. It is history even though a tad awkward as a conversation piece in BA. Funny where they built their memorial.
I went down there twice, made some exceptionally good mates across the service divide, percy and crab. Don't think I could have named more than one or two of the bars although I stumbled into most. I hate drinking out of cans now but it was Dinger of 1312 and his gin that destroyed the most cells. Ah - strangely happy days! Found myself horse trekking in the Andes a while ago and my guide's father was a regular on the other side at the time of the punch up. It is history even though a tad awkward as a conversation piece in BA. Funny where they built their memorial.
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Market Gap
Agree with 16B on opportunities for improvement. What else is there? Tried Stanley as a social alternative during an earlier stint this year and met a man in the Globe. He was not local and was still relatively sober, but he announced that a few beers in Stanley was a return to civilisation and provided some company! He had been putting up a cabin for BAS on Bird Island, off South Georgia.
I think I'll stay inside the compound next time.
I think I'll stay inside the compound next time.