Semper Fi versus the Royal (real?) Marines

[Pilgrim101]

I liked this one I was told by an American friend this morning.

With apologies in advance

Many years ago, Commandant General Royal Marines was on a visit to the USMC at Camp Pendleton and was invited to accompany the USMC General on his inspection of the brutal, oppressive tools of the Imperialist Great Satan, the American Marine Corps elite.

As the finest specimens of US fitness and discipline (I know, I know) lined up in their PT kit, the US General took out a knuckleduster and delivered a surprise blow to the solar plexus of the first Marine and asked " Did that hurt son ?", to which the Marine replied, Sir, No Sir ! The General asked "and why didn't it hurt ?" to which the Marine replied with tears in his eyes "Sir, because I'm a US Marine, Sir !"

Further along, the General sized up another Marine, suddenly kneed him full force in the groin and said, " Did that hurt son ?", to which the Marine replied, Sir, No Sir ! The General asked "and why didn't it hurt ?" to which the Marine replied with tears in his eyes "Sir, because I'm a US Marine, Sir !"

CGRM then asked if he could do the honours and the US General wholeheartedly agreed, knowing that the Limey could only be impressed by his boys. Looking down the line, CGRM saw a Marine with a huge erection poking out of his shorts. He took his swagger stick (I know, I know) and thwacked it a cracker and said to the Marine " Did that hurt son ?", to which the Marine replied, Sir, No Sir ! The General asked "and why didn't it hurt ?" to which the Marine replied "Sir, because it belongs to the Marine behind me, Sir !"

[Argus]

Royal Marines

First heard this when I was with 848 SQN in the late 60s supporting 2 Commando Brigade as part of the Far East Strategic Reserve; except that the traditional version has it that it's the new RM LtCol CO inspecting his Commando, and he uses a swagger stick on his troops. He also manages to say "Verrrry good" in response.

One thing I did learn whilst operating in proximity to Americans near THAT war, was their propensity to exaggerate!

There are other Royal Marine jokes of the same vintage including:

"Royal Marines shuuun"!
"Royal Marines, twice round the world, GO".
"Why are you late"?
"Thought you said three times Sgt".

OR

"Royal Marines shuuun"!
"Royal Marines, off caps".
"Royal Marines, on your heads, bounce"!

Jokes apart, I found the Royal Marines to be a most professional force. Supporting their jungle ops, especially at night was adrenalin rushing, challenging and not for the faint hearted. Those accustomed to crabfat air conditioned accommodation, weekday 9-5 duty hours and self imposed low flying restrictions soon found their talents lay elsewhere!

[Pilgrim101]

Couldn't agree with you more

Just not in public, that's all

I seem to remember that the cartoonist Tugg Wilson (?) used to always have a Marine in the background of his cartoons munching on a seagull or something ?

[Argus]

Tugg still manages to capture the moment. You can see some of his more recent work at www.fleetairarmoa.org/

[Pilgrim101]

Thanks Argus ! Any connections with M Flight ?