Send me your cliches

[BelixA]

I can't believe the response i've had.
For those of you wondering why i havent updated the site with all these new ones i've been "up to my arse in alligators" all week but I'll be "good to go" soon.
cheers all.

[Arclite01]

'He's a social hand grenade - with the pin out...........!'

added value - always important

Arc

[Talking Radalt]

Mate o'mine took a young lady to a summer ball, very impressed she was, verily swept off her stiletto-heeled feet.
And how did he round off the evening/morning?

"Left 'er face looking like a painter's radio"

Anyone translate?

[Now a 'J' Bloke!!]

"Left 'er face looking like a painter's radio"

Hi Gang;

Sounds like a similar line to ' gave her a pearl necklace'!!!

More Cliches....

However,Comma!!
Not as Such!!
I hear what you are saying!!

Regards to Most...SFS

[Farfrompuken]

"You don't need the brains of an Archbishop/Rocket Scientist......"

"Every landing you walk away from is a good one"

not sure the next one is well used, but was worthy of comment:

" You're supposed to make love to the sky, not shag it!" Brendon O'Mallon (?) of C4s Spitfire Pilot show

"As camp as a row of tents"

"N.F.I...."

"It's/I'm FUBARed"

etc..

[Muppet Leader]

Or there is always the good one if you have a teenage son like me. . . .

Bedroom design by Claymore !

[Anita Bush]

" I would rather slam my knob in the top drawer of the map chest"

[alamo]

"Bucket of instant sunshine"
"My brain's dot-crossing" [remember the G4 compass?]
"... Leader, I've got a bogey on the nose"
[At Thule] "Behind every tree there's a woman"
"Cheap as a Changi watch"
"Eyes like pee-holes in the snow"
"Dim as a NAAFI candle" [my dad says that]
"Gown by Blacks of Greenock"

[SirToppamHat]

There are only 2 kinds of single officer (living in the Mess) ... those who p*ss in their sinks .... and liars!

[BEagle]

Isn't the correct version "You lie like a cheap Changi watch"?

One I heard recently about the effort equired to hold full rudder in a Meteor on one engine: "It left you with more of a trembling leg than a dog crapping razorblades!"

"MLT failure" (Master Locking Turd failure - i.e. an attack of Malta Dog!)

"Backside going half a crown - sixpence" (In a seriously worrying predicament)

And the old chestnuts like "Rare as rocking horse $hit"......

[propulike]

"The ball's in your court. But it's my ball."

How much fuel? "Fill it 'til it leaks."

Every November about next months' tasking "Is Op Deny Christmas out yet?"

And has no-one here done an 'Ascot Shuffle' or a 'Maritime Mingle'???

[Airbedane]

'Too much thrust is never enough'

'Goes up like a homesick angel'

'Comes down like a brickbuilt (sh*thouse)'

'showusyertits' and '38 Gp pissmeoff' - LIV Sqn stickers circa 1976

'Couldn't organise a sh*t in a dysentery ward, or a fu*k in a brothel - or a PU in a you know what, either!'

Friday night 1700 - 'Take the rest of the week off, son'

'If you can't drink and fly, son, don't fly'

'I feel sorry for those people that don't drink, 'cos when they get up in the morning, that's the best they're going to feel all day'

'Back to my place for an 'eggy-bakes''

'Went down like a lead baloon, or a pork pie in a synagog'

'Sticks out like a KiloNiner' - (Kilo Nine = Canine = canine appendage = dogs boll**ks)

'Going at a great rate (of Knots)'

'Nothing on the clock but the makers name'

'Balls out, or Balls to the wall'

'Going like a drain' - anyone know where that comes from?

'As useless as: Yesterdays metbrief, the runway behind you, the fuel you've just jetisonned, tits on a bull'

......That'll do for now, more later............(apologies for repeats)

[Cardinal Puff]

"...Fly anything with wings except a bucket of fried chicken!"

[Incipient Sinner]

"On the bus.....off the bus"

Sweating like a Mississippi n*gg*r in a white rape trial"

"Martin Baker let-down"



PS. Top post Bo.

[alamo]

"To be Newfed" - when one of supposedly inferior intellect gets one over. With apologies to the good people of Goose and Gander etc.

[RRAAMJET]

"SLIPOD" ...senior living-in prince of darkness (each Mess had one)

"Eyes like a London Underground map"

"If wine, women and song are getting too much for you, give up singing..."

"The nurse slapped her at the wrong end when she was born"

variation on previous: "face like a bulldog chewing a wasp"

"Vuja de: none of this sh1t has ever happened to me before"

[Anita Bush]

.....bangs like a belt-fed Wombat.


No, I don't know where that comes from either.

[BEagle]

I thought it was "Bangs like a belt fed mortar"? And no, I haven't met her either....

"Station bicycle store" - WRAF accommodation. Can say that now, political correctos, 'cos there's no such thing as a WRAF (or WAAF) any more. Apart from Susannah York in my dreams, of course....

One simile I once heard from that famous Geordie VC10 air engineer instructor "As cold as a well-diggers chuff"

[Anita Bush]

Ahhhhhhhh ...... Susannah York.....Battle of Britain.....

'You there.......put that fag out'

'Don't you bl@@dy well shout at me!!!'

.........Ahhhhhhhhh

[checksix]

.....as usless as an ashtray on a motor bike.