101 Ways to Annoy an Instructor
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101 Ways to Annoy an Instructor
Turn up completely unprepared, having failed to think about anything since your last lesson.....and expect the Instructor to lead you by the hand yet again.
Join Date: Mar 2000
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Turning up late or sitting there drinking coffee and not starting the check out until your allotted time comes up, meaning you (instructor)has even less time to fit in a brief than usual.
I've got loads of these, but I'd rather not seem like a twisted and sour individual!!
I've got loads of these, but I'd rather not seem like a twisted and sour individual!!
Join Date: Oct 1998
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I'm running late, but see next student sitting down in lounge so don't worry. Whizz past him saying 'hi, be with you in a minute', with previous student in tow off to briefing room for de-brief. Get rid of previous student, collect next student and brief. On way out to a/c with next student, ask him assumingly if he's checked a/c out. He replies NO! You what! I can't believe it. We're going to need an aeroplane, aren't we? My fault I suppose for assuming student has an ounce of intelligence. Now tell reception that when certain students arrive, immediately point them in direction of aeroplane.
Regards, GT.
P.S. then discover aeroplane needs fuel and oil!
Regards, GT.
P.S. then discover aeroplane needs fuel and oil!
Ask "didn't you want to fly proper airplanes? You know - like for an airline or something"?
WWW
WWW
When I was a student I found loads of ways of annoying my instructors. My favourite was:
Ignore his repeated instructions to reduce power on approach with four white lights on the VASI's - then do a perfect touchdown just past the numbers without touching the throttle except to close it in the flare.
Doing anything greater than 3 degree approaches really used to annoy them.
Ignore his repeated instructions to reduce power on approach with four white lights on the VASI's - then do a perfect touchdown just past the numbers without touching the throttle except to close it in the flare.
Doing anything greater than 3 degree approaches really used to annoy them.
Before you do anything just ask him "Shall I do (so and so) now, sir?"!
E.g "Shall I call for taxi now?"
"Shall I take off now?"
etc - you get the drift
Then you get on the approach get very low and say "Shall I put on power now, sir"
Exasperated instructor now blows his cool and says "No mate let's crash instead!" (Expletives deleted)
Another good way to annoy your instructor is to forget everything you were taught on the previous lesson. You know the sort of thing, you did Stalling Part One last time and you are now on Stalling Part Two and you behave as though you have never heard of the HASELL checks before!
E.g "Shall I call for taxi now?"
"Shall I take off now?"
etc - you get the drift
Then you get on the approach get very low and say "Shall I put on power now, sir"
Exasperated instructor now blows his cool and says "No mate let's crash instead!" (Expletives deleted)
Another good way to annoy your instructor is to forget everything you were taught on the previous lesson. You know the sort of thing, you did Stalling Part One last time and you are now on Stalling Part Two and you behave as though you have never heard of the HASELL checks before!
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1. Forget to bring a headset out to the aircraft 4 lesson in a row.
2. Turn up to a nav lesson with an all singing and dancing GPS which is worth about 2 months pay of the instructor before tax.
2. Turn up to a nav lesson with an all singing and dancing GPS which is worth about 2 months pay of the instructor before tax.
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Had a few laughs reading these guys. A quick reverse question and maybe not the right place but what advice would you give ATPL student about to start his part 1 flight training to create a great 1st view on behalf of said instructor. Not that I want 'best flight recruit award' at graduation ceremony...but I do!
Just thought of another one.
You are now on circuit training and coming to grips with the landing. After rounding out move the stick sharply forward so that the instructor has just enough time to grab the controls despite the fact that the nosewheel has hit the ground with just enough force to make the instructor worry that you have bent something. This is best done after a few relatively well judged landings so that the instructor has been lulled into a false sense of security!
You are now on circuit training and coming to grips with the landing. After rounding out move the stick sharply forward so that the instructor has just enough time to grab the controls despite the fact that the nosewheel has hit the ground with just enough force to make the instructor worry that you have bent something. This is best done after a few relatively well judged landings so that the instructor has been lulled into a false sense of security!
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prat100 buy him/her beer, it usually works with me! Seriously, don't be a know it all and don't make excuses if you make a mistake, we all know it's bulls**t having made the same excuses ourselves!! Oh yeah, Turn up on time!!
People putting a/c back on the flight line without much fuel left. Just check the gauge on the taxi back!! Less than 1/2 tanks, get it filled. Do it again and
People putting a/c back on the flight line without much fuel left. Just check the gauge on the taxi back!! Less than 1/2 tanks, get it filled. Do it again and
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When getting debriefed after every point you have made. The reply from the student starts with "but"
And inventing things and checks which were never taught.
eg deploying full flaps after landing flapless when asked why replied air brakes. This was after being briefed that you don't touch anything until after clear of the runway and stationary.
MJ
And inventing things and checks which were never taught.
eg deploying full flaps after landing flapless when asked why replied air brakes. This was after being briefed that you don't touch anything until after clear of the runway and stationary.
MJ
Join Date: Mar 2001
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- forget to bring the key, fetch key.
- forget headsets, fetch headsets,
- have the airplane fuelled, then forget to sump it and claim to hear a misfire,
- deny all knowledge of what a GUMPS check is,
- appear to have everything completely under control in all manouvers, then bugga them all up at the last second,
- have an engine blow up on you at 4000 feet,
- work diligently for several lessons, then disappear without explanation for several months,
- fly like crap before every checkride, then mysteriously pass them somehow
Errr, wonder how I managed to think of all these ....
- forget headsets, fetch headsets,
- have the airplane fuelled, then forget to sump it and claim to hear a misfire,
- deny all knowledge of what a GUMPS check is,
- appear to have everything completely under control in all manouvers, then bugga them all up at the last second,
- have an engine blow up on you at 4000 feet,
- work diligently for several lessons, then disappear without explanation for several months,
- fly like crap before every checkride, then mysteriously pass them somehow
Errr, wonder how I managed to think of all these ....
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Every third lesson, say you're not really in the mood today and just want to fly for fun and can you fly over your Mum's/Granny's/ neighbours'/best friend's house again.
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- An hour trial lesson.
Swagger into the clubhouse with family in-tow being all arrogant and cocky. Repeatedly say that flying will be a slice-of-urine coz you have MS FS2004 GTI at home and you're dead-ace coz you could land the Learjet on the carrier without going off the end.
30 minutes into the lesson you are in the middle-of-nowhere. There are no diversion airfields. Then you vomit. But when you vomit, rather than using the sickbag the instructor has just managed to provide you with you end up doing a scene from The Exorcist. And even better... leave the headset boom where it is just to:
a) Assist Exorcist-style spraying motion.
b) Allow Instructor to hear Exorcist-style vomit session in glorious stereo.
Then say...I don't normally get air sick.
Swagger into the clubhouse with family in-tow being all arrogant and cocky. Repeatedly say that flying will be a slice-of-urine coz you have MS FS2004 GTI at home and you're dead-ace coz you could land the Learjet on the carrier without going off the end.
30 minutes into the lesson you are in the middle-of-nowhere. There are no diversion airfields. Then you vomit. But when you vomit, rather than using the sickbag the instructor has just managed to provide you with you end up doing a scene from The Exorcist. And even better... leave the headset boom where it is just to:
a) Assist Exorcist-style spraying motion.
b) Allow Instructor to hear Exorcist-style vomit session in glorious stereo.
Then say...I don't normally get air sick.
Turn up in your powder blue Ferrari 355 Spyder for flying lessons and repeatedly fail to either lend it briefly to your instructor, or even take him for a blast in it, despite numerous heavy handed and increasingly unsubtle hints.
Then try and hide a GPS in your bag on a solo navex.
Its a rum life being an instructor thats for sure.
Cheers
WWW
Then try and hide a GPS in your bag on a solo navex.
Its a rum life being an instructor thats for sure.
Cheers
WWW
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Students who keep making wise cracks and one liners during a briefing......
students who argue the toss about what is written in the legislation......
Students who arrive with 30 year old copies of Campbell, or Thom, and refuse to buy new editions because "Its all the same stuff."
Students who crirticise other instructors (My friends and colleagues!) to my face but behind their backs.....
The list could go on......
This one could run!
Blueskies!
students who argue the toss about what is written in the legislation......
Students who arrive with 30 year old copies of Campbell, or Thom, and refuse to buy new editions because "Its all the same stuff."
Students who crirticise other instructors (My friends and colleagues!) to my face but behind their backs.....
The list could go on......
This one could run!
Blueskies!