More Dumb Responses.....
 

1) On a flight from CLT to IAH, a very happy pax was telling me all about how she had almost missed her Mexico vacation because of the hurricane in Cancun and US Airways wasn't flying to Cancun but they had been soooo sweet and rebooked her on Continental so she could still get there today. (The hurricane, BTW, was headed directly for Cancun.)

Me: Umm, why do you think we will be flying into a hurricane when US Airways will not?

Pax: But Continental flies out of Houston. US Air is out of Charlotte.

Me: Yes, but the hurricane is headed for Cancun......

Pax (looking very downtrodden): Oh. I think they just rebooked me to get rid of me.

Ya think?????


2) Standing at the gate, waiting for the aircraft that was coming from customs, slight delay.... Gate agent made a very nice, clear PA explaining situation and assuring everyone she'd update them if the wait would be longer than ten minutes.

The very professional businessman standing RIGHT IN FRONT of her said, "Is that for me too?" Honest to God, he did:D :D :D


3) And one for the boys up front....

I am from Scotland and had some of my fellow countrymen on a flight from somewhere oil-related into IAH (can't remember from where). We had a nice conversation during the flight and when they got off in Houston they said their fair-thee-wells in a broad Doric accent. I replied in kind. Captain looked at me and said, "What language were they speaking?" "English!" I replied, "Sort of - they're from my hometown."

"Did you understand them?" asked the f/o. :rolleyes:

The first will be the last...
 

This is all hearsay, and you might have heard it before...

Airplane lands and taxies to the terminal. While still taxying, a passenger gets up and stands near the entrance. CC ask the man to return to his seat, then tell him to return to his seats etc., but the man flatly refuses since he's in a hurry and wants to be first off the plane.

Apparently the captain hears this and tells the ground crew via the radio "The airbridge is broken today." "No it isn't, it is perfectly servicable" "You don't understand, the airbridge is broken today because I tell you so, and you're going to bring stairs to the back of the plane for the passengers to disembark. I'll explain later." But obviously captain doesn't tell anybody else in the aircraft until the aircraft comes to a complete stop at the gates, all passengers get up to retrieve their hand luggage and the aisle is completely blocked.

Passenger last off the plane, fuming... :-)

More importantly, its so that the hosties can clearly "Assess Conditions" as part of an Emergency Evacuation, therefore ensuring slides dont get blown into nastys such as fire, a building, any other form of undesirable hazard!

Recently on a flight from LGW to DFW. The seat belt signs had gone on during the flight because of turbulence, and I noticed a pax standing in the club cabin with the locker open trying to get something out. So I walked up to him..
Me: Sir, please could you sit down and fasten your seat belt.
Pax: But I'm doing something.
Me: Well as we are going through turbulence the captain has turned on the fasten seat belt sign so please could you sit down and fasten your seat belt.
Pax: But the sign was off when I stood up.

F*cking sit down!!!!!!!!!!!! you've had the last 6 hours to get stuff out your bag :ugh:

I had a pax having a right go at me as there were no sandwiches left. This was a 2 hour flight and apparently it was digusting and she was never going fly easyJet again. Shame. I hate the Costa Del Chav flights! Why didn't she buy food earlier? She was also quite a porker, would have done her good to skip a meal anyway! ;) The amount of times we run out of sarnies, oooo yes, I'll just hop down to the ground and get some fresh ones :ugh:

Stupid Cow: Why has it taken you 15 minutes to serve me? This is disgraceful!
Me: As you can see, the flight is very busy and we are trying our best to serve everyone as quickly as possible.
Stupid Cow: Well it's not good enough

I'm not quite sure what she expected me to do. Magic some more cabin crew up to fawn over her and wait on her hand and foot?

Dear oh dear oh dear........Are you in the service industry or what? Not an unreasonable request for a sandwich on a two hour flight(i do accept she might have had an attitude problem) but really to call her fat etc is unreasonable. You are one of the MANY reasons i will never ever,ever fly Easyjet!
Stands by with flame proof suit on............

Bloody hell bowl of milk for two!
How unpleasant can you lot get...this seemed to be a humourous thread ...but now it is sheer vitriol.

Thats me off out of it.

Its amazing how many times someones needed to remind that this is a string for hosties to vent the many frustrations they come across daily!
I would assume that any hostie who read Virginia's post would be nodding in agreeance at the very least, have seen/said/thought similiar if not worse things!!!

If you cant read these posts in the theraputic tone that they're intended, then please, dont read them!


My personal seatbelt sign greivance typified -
*seatbelt sign goes on, PA from Capt*
*SLF wanders down the back*
Me: "Sorry Ma'am, youll have to pop back to your seat and pop your seatbelt on as the Captain just said, its a wee bit too bumpy to be up and about"
SLF: "Oh, I just want to go to the toilet"
Me: "Oh ok, well if you can do that from your seat with your seatbelt on, let me know as i feel it would be impressive to watch"

Given that the thread title refers to "Thick Passengers", isn't it a bit late to be objecting to the tone of it?

I think the title says it all. Speaking as SLF who has on occasion committed Thick Passenger sins myself, I can entirely sympathise with CC needing to vent to colleagues.

And it doesn't make me feel so alone in my dingbattery.... :bored:

FG1-On behalf of myself and my fellow crew members, thank you for choosing not to fly easyJet.

And that woman was a stupid cow, even the passengers sitting behind her were rolling their eyes and one of them said to me later: 'wasn't that woman a stupid cow?'

So it wasn't just me and my fellow hostie thinking that!

Please don't speak on my behalf Virginia. Whilst we might be wanting to vent steam on this thread, personally I would not refer to a pax as a porker or a stupid cow.

FG1 I am senior crew with easyJet and Virginia doesn't speak on my behalf. Personally I like my pax to leave my aircraft happy and usually they make nice comments to me when they leave.

So, you will be more than welcome on one of my flights in future :)

You couldn't make them up!
 

PAX: "Excuse me, could I have a glass of water?"

F/A: "Sure"

F/A returns a couple of seconds later with the water

PAX: "Oh, sorry, can I get a glass of water without ice, it's just that I'm allergic to ice"


And another...

(Meal service on a flight to Lagos, Nigeria)

F/A: "Would you like any wine with your meal madam?"

PAX: "Give me red"

F/A hands over bottle of red wine, pax looks at the label and says "I don't want this one, give me another"

F/A goes in trolley, fetches different red wine, hands it to pax, she looks at the label and says "I don't want this wine, give me another"

F/A explains to pax that those are the only 2 red wines they have today.

Pax thinks for a few secs and then says "OK, give me white wine instead"

F/A reaches in trolley for bottle of white wine, hands it to pax, pax looks at the label and says "I don't want this one, give me another"

F/A apologises to pax and says "Sorry madam, but that is the only white wine we have today.

PAX looks dissapointed and says "OK, just give me water"

F/A pours the water and as he's doing so wants to find out what kind of wine exactly the pax was looking for so as he's pouring the water he asks her "Madam, may I just ask, were those wines not to your liking?"

PAX replies "No, they were all out of date"

F/A: "Out of date?"

PAX: "Yes, out of date. They all said 1998 on them" :ugh:

As I said, you couldn't make them up! :rolleyes:

Thanks Getoutofmygalley!
Just think it's all down to (hopefully)mutual respect which calling someone fat is lacking in. I have seen some real idiots on flights that deserved a cutting "put down". Most of us aren't like that i hope. Anyway i know this is a thick passenger comments thread but i'm afraid not all air crew are immune to the odd "thick" moment in my experience. Perhaps Virginia should think about doing something else if she gets so wound up by such trivia.....
There is a time and place to get arsy when it's truly justified which in my experience is getting all too common on aircraft.This,however,is not one of them. I really don't think that Virginia's grievance is up to much and i will take on board what you say about Easyjet!
Paul

Dear Paul:

I am not a CC but am working on the FD, and I do know some about what our girls have to put up with.
Whatever is said in a forum like this, please bear in mind that it is all supposed to be things exchanged between people in the same business, and therefore private opinnions will, and have the right, to come out.

It appears to me that you are SLF and you feel jumped upon by reading the posts here. I will suggest that you then go to some other business forum, eg "Old-lawyers-dinner-discussion-group" where I am sure it is all more politically correct.

Please do not come as an outsider and start a fight. You have no idea what crew's have to put up with, no matter how many times you fly as pax, and how observant you are. Enjoy the good stories, please add to them or go somewhere else when you wish to puke!!!

That said, you are always welcome as pax and do deserve the good service you have paid for. :)

Just not in this forum here :}

Girls, I love reading the stories, even though some of them is aimed at the pointing end := ;)

That was well said and Polite ..:D

Thank-you !!

(Don't forget about the Male Crew )

I agree. If someone annoys us on board, the first thing we do is go into the galley and have a whinge about the 'fat animal who wanted pringles'

I have never seen this reflected in the cabin though. From what i have seen crew are generally friendly and handle all situations well.

Lets not take take what we do out of proportion.

Thick pax comment/s: You usually get at least one when a female FO/Capt speaks over the PA. Even to the extent that on disembarking 'Chavs' (I think that is what the English refer to them as :) they will poke their head in the F/D and say 'I didnt believe it - a female driver got us here safely!'

I'm a SLF and don't have a problem with the CC venting in here - how some of the passengers I see on SIA flights don't get a good slapping from the crew is beyond me.

This would be great if it were true, I was sent it the other day and it made me chuckle:

A Mormon was seated next to an Australian on a flight from London
to Melbourne. After the plane was airborne, drink orders were taken.

The Aussie asked for a rum and Coke, which was brought and placed before him.

The flight attendant then asked the Mormon if he would like a drink.

He replied in disgust, "I'd rather be savagely raped by a dozen whores
than let liquor touch my lips."

The Aussie then handed his drink back to the attendant and said
"Me too. I didn't know we had a choice".

I had a beauty the other day!
A lady ask me after the Safety Demo if she had to blow up her own lifejacket!
I explained to her that no the crew come and blow them up for all the passengers just before we crash!
She replied "how do you find the time?"

HONESTLY!!!!!:ugh: :ugh: :ugh:

Agreed wholeheartedly. Virginia has spoken many times on PPRuNe about how she's not happy at easyJet. I find it quite funny that she thinks passengers expecting good service ("magic up more cabin crew to fawn over [the passenger]") yet in another thread she said she'd much prefer to "serve claret wine to stuffy old men on BA" than work at easyJet.

easyJet is what you make of it, and while we may be low cost it's not beyond our ability to cater to different passengers and make sure everyone has a good experience. If working for easyJet is below you, Virginia, why are you still here?

Of course this thread is about "thick passengers", but perhaps "stupid cow" and "porker" are a bit strong?

Urok, yes this thread is meant for FAs to giggle at our pax and to vent some frustration. And yes I am a hostie ;) That does not mean you will find me nodding in agreement with Virginia's latest.
I seldom nod in agreement with Virginia's posts.
Virginia's posts are by and large of such breathtaking stupidity, such callow disregard for her pax, such utter disinterest in doing a professional job as a flight attendant that I have at times wondered if her persona was a clever wind-up.
A wind-up intended to make FAs look like shallow, feckless, inane single-braincell entities with the charm and integrity of Ms Jade Goody of UK Big Brother fame.

Here's just a few quick examples in case you think I exaggerate.

Good news for EZ :ok:

Hopefully that 'nice little office job' will also put an end to her posting here. :rolleyes: