Where is Mr Guppy these days?
A little less conversation,
a little more aviation...
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 696
Likes: 0
From: Bracknell, UK
It's just not fair, is it?
There you are, in your twilight years, and all you want is a bit of excitement in life. A bit of fizz, a touch of sparkle, a hint of living dangerously.
Yes, there's the regular rush of adrenalin when they bring the tea-trolley round, and you have the thrill of discovery: will it be custard creams, choccy digestives or...in a moment of madness...garibaldi?
But what you're really yearning for, the escape to the wild-side, back to the carefree days of youth, full speed ahead and damn the torpedoes.....what you really want, what you really, really want is to be banned by Pprune, knowing that your name will pass into legend, that threads will run for weeks debating your legacy, and that folk will post reverential comments along the lines of "FBM...love him or hate him...you have to say, he really knew his biscuits"
But no...not after ten years, a thousand posts, nothing. Not even a hint of a reprimand. Not so much as a gentle chiding about a repost, not a thread you started moved to a more appropriate forum, not a request to keep your image postings to the forum recommended dimensions. Nothing.
The trouble is, old mate, you're too nice. You're not just square, you're a hypercube. You're Cleggy from Last of the Summer Wine, never an unkind word or deed, when what you really want to be is Compo, the scruffy miscreant - all ferrets and binder twine, winding up the Nora Batty.
But we're all friends here, and as such we hate to see you pining away, unable to fulfill your dreams. So, here's what we're going to do.
You're going to pretend to take huge exception to something I've posted, and call me a very, very bad name. Something to do with donkeys, maybe. I'm going to pretend to be upset, and complain to the beak. When he - presumably in a state of shock - asks you to withdraw the comment, you call him the same thing....twice....in public. There won't be any alternative then....like Nora Batty setting about Compo with a broom, you'll be out on your ear. Grinning like a maniac.
Job done. As I've said, we're all your mates here, and we're here to help. I know you'd do the same thing for me, old timer. I know you would.
Joined: May 2001
Posts: 2,118
Likes: 0
You absolkute effin bleedin soddin b'stard how dare yo speak to em like that I'll hav emy nurse thrash you to withjin an inchof your scrawnylife wiv me Zimmer...why..I'll...I'll...come round there on me mobitiyt scooetr and I'll...I'll...
A little less conversation,
a little more aviation...
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 696
Likes: 0
From: Bracknell, UK
I love it when a plan comes together.
Fleet Manager
Joined: Aug 2006
Aviation Qualifications: CPL
Posts: 7,089
Likes: 2,952
From: Ontario, Canada
Um... doesn't FBM have to insult and alienate the whole group, then describe some entirely unusual and seemingly unsafe flying technique as being normal, then mention getting shot at a few times while flying a night approach to minimums with an engine shut down, and several other system failures, then describe how he performed a glide landing, while his keys freefell 18,000 feet, to incur the wrath of the moderator?
A little less conversation,
a little more aviation...
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 696
Likes: 0
From: Bracknell, UK
Um... doesn't FBM have to insult and alienate the whole group, then describe some entirely unusual and seemingly unsafe flying technique as being normal, then mention getting shot at a few times while flying a night approach to minimums with an engine shut down, and several other system failures, then describe how he performed a glide landing, while his keys freefell 18,000 feet, to incur the wrath of the moderator?
FBM: You might want to improvise with a "Canadians - why do they all have flappy faces like Terrance and Phillip?" thread to help things along....but, on second thoughts, you don't know who Terrance and Phillip are, and if you did, you'd only be upset at the whole concept. Hence disregard all after "FBM's rolling with it" above.
Pilot DAR: Disregard all after "FBM:" above.
Fleet Manager
Joined: Aug 2006
Aviation Qualifications: CPL
Posts: 7,089
Likes: 2,952
From: Ontario, Canada
FBM will not be able to respond for 24hrs..........
Joined: May 2001
Posts: 4,631
Likes: 0
From: UK
One odd thing about PPRuNe is that the rules are rarely if ever stated,
Cusing - 8 hours,
Thrashing with zimmer frames - 6 hours,
Threatening GBH - 6 hours,
Mention of saucy nurses - 4 hours,
now does that come to 24 hours.
all mild in comparison with what some have done on here.
Administrator
Joined: Mar 2001
Aviation Qualifications: PPL
Posts: 8,121
Likes: 686
From: Twickenham, home of rugby
Stage three is to send a rude and insulting PM to the mods*.
Go on, FBM, you know you want to!
SD
*That's what gets you permanently banned.
Go on, FBM, you know you want to!
SD
*That's what gets you permanently banned.
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,275
Likes: 21
From: London
The only reason I got banned was because I was told you need at least one ban before you become eligible as a moderator.
I can feel it, soon the mods will be divulging their junior-mod-selection criteria!
I can feel it, soon the mods will be divulging their junior-mod-selection criteria!