A rare picture of the endangered grenouille à grande bouche. (Wide-mouthed frog.)

- Ed

Up Periscope, right up his Peri

Shooting commences for the latest Macroni Western.

They will never find the fallen Madonna with the big boobies down here!

Let me be clear! the ship of state is NOT sinking!

Oh for goodness sake, speak English if all you can say is “Mon aeroglisseur est plein d’aguilles!”

"Make me a winner".

Overheard on CH 16 `,This is the `Charles de Gaulle`,Flagship of the French Navy`,I command you to turn 30*starboard immediately to avoid a collision with my ship".......

"Napoleon,this is Eddy Stone`s Lighthouse;suggest it`s your move.."

Hear this, hear this, No-one is allowed on the bridge Till further Notice! Mrs Macron is about to take a shower!

Bump up

"Hello, eez zat ze Acme Uniform Company? Some seely booger has made my name "Macaroni"!

I can assure you, that from the safety of my Sub somewhere in the Atlantic Trench, that Russia will NOT nuke France in the next two minutes...Update in six-months....

Does anyone here on the bridge speak Hindi?

Attention! This is your captain, uh, president speaking. Thank you all for your patience.
I can now reveal that our present mission is to put French boots under water. The time has finally come, so fill your boots!

...and above all men, always remember the motto of the French Navy is "a l'eau c’'est l'heure". That is all...

(Thanks to SLXOwft for kindly stepping into the breach and to the late Miles Kington for the essential element of this entry...)

La résistance est futile!

Raise Le Battle Flag…
Which one is that mon Capitaine?
MON DIEU, Le white one of course.