"Damn - I just mowed that bit!"

Nigel the tug operator hadn't been aware of just how fast he was going till he turned the corner.

'Mr Bond has left it too late to get into the aircraft this time' thought the only medic left in the RAF from the wheel of his latest ambulance.

That's gonna sting!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v3.../Lightning.jpg
The rivalry in the "Straightest Furrow" event was intense, and competitors sometimes attempted to break their rivals' concentration. This run in the 1968 competition was hampered by a distraction considered unsporting by many of those present.

adr

"Now there's a problem. I don't have a tow bar for that one!"

or by the pilot

"If I can land near the tractor I might be able to get a ride home."

Mechanised farming took a big leap forward in 1968 when the Government agreed to form a new strike force using G expended Lightning

"It's going to take me at least ten minutes to get home and find my Home Guard uniform - thank God I've still got a serviceable pitchfork" thought Bert.

Driver: "Tch, some people will do anything for a free tie and lunch at Farnborough".

An early prototype of the "ejectable aircraft battery" in the final stages of testing. It was later offered to the USA military for the AV8B.

Or,

"Right! That'll teach him and his bloody cockerel!"

Farmer Pickles: " That's a rummun....I wonder if the EU will pay me a subsidy for this here field now?"

Imagine if he'd put in a low flying complaint......How many weeks/months would the RAF Coppers have taken to track down the offending pilot?;)

Having just invented the world's first magnet to attract aluminium alloys, the inventor was shocked to see that
a: it proved very effective and
b: its current hiding place was quickly located by the authorities

Fred was bemused, after being told to plough in good weather, here he was, about to suffer a lightning strike, and hardly a rain cloud in sight

Pilot: "Oh f*ck, I guess that's not the seat adjust lever then!"

Photographer:

“When I say cheese please don’t turn your back on me like that………….oh ****”

Photographer

"You know - this will highlight the rapidly narrowing gap between the old and the new technologies."

Tractor driver: "Now that is a very radical way to turn swords into ploughshares!" :ok:

"Flying Complaints, Farmer Palmer?? Complain about THIS then, you whining old B@st@rd!!!!"

With apologies to the Bard:

From a Fieldmouse

Muckle sleekit, tumblin', plummetin' beastie,
Oh what a panic's in thy breastie!
Thou needs tae start awa sae hasty,
Wi bickering brattle!
Thon bird be keen tae rin and chase thee,
Wi' murderin' pattle!


Doggerel aside, the Bard's original last 2 verses of "To a Mouse" (an ode to a mouse from a plougman who has just disturbed it's nest) could have been written for this picture:

But Mousie, art thou no thy lane,
In proving foresight may be vain:
The best laid schemes o' mice an' men
Gang aft agley.
An leave us nought but grief an' pain,
for promis'd joy!

Still thou art blest, compar'd wi' me!
The present only toucheth thee:
But Och! I backward cast my e'e,
On prospects drear!
An' forward tho I canna see,
I guess an' fear!

I've heard of "Dropping in from behind" but this is taking the pi$$

Imagegear