Human Rights & haircuts
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Human Rights & haircuts
Although this thread may be perceived as a JO prank, I have served Her Majesty for loang enough to have earned my shilling many times over. Furthermore, I have reached that time in life when I am getting a little fed up of being told that I cannot take a vacation in Cuba or visit the Irish Republic without permission.
On similar lines, although I have no wish to see Ozzie Osborne replicas wearing HM uniform, I think that the restrictions on facial hair are a little over zealous in this tree hugging age. Can anybody see a situation were a goatie beard, full beard or a styled haircut would have any detrimental effect on service discipline. Particulary interested in hearing the views from our colonial cousins as to their restrictions on freedom of movement and personal grooming habits.
I appreciate that NISOPS are written for 4 young p155ed squadies in a Ford Fiesta finding themselves in the wrong street, but surely maturity could and should reap some benefits. In other words, as a long standing member of HM Forces, I think it about time that the British Citizen within be allowed to enjoy a LIFE!
On similar lines, although I have no wish to see Ozzie Osborne replicas wearing HM uniform, I think that the restrictions on facial hair are a little over zealous in this tree hugging age. Can anybody see a situation were a goatie beard, full beard or a styled haircut would have any detrimental effect on service discipline. Particulary interested in hearing the views from our colonial cousins as to their restrictions on freedom of movement and personal grooming habits.
I appreciate that NISOPS are written for 4 young p155ed squadies in a Ford Fiesta finding themselves in the wrong street, but surely maturity could and should reap some benefits. In other words, as a long standing member of HM Forces, I think it about time that the British Citizen within be allowed to enjoy a LIFE!
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Having 3 times shaved off a beard for HM, I sympathise, Yozzer!
Thread title was a bit misleading as you appear to only be concerned regarding facial hair (there were some WAAFs in my days who would have maybe benefitted from some attention in this dept!!), not haircuts in general.
I believe the argument relating to facial hair has always been the sealing of oxygen / NBC masks being virtually non-existent with beards and I can see the logic in this. There is also the issue of tidiness of fungal growth - there are certain people who would look somewhat ridiculous with faial hair whilst others looks would be enhanced!
You could always use a bit of DTD585 (or whatever flavour of hydraulic oil takes your fancy) and inflict a bit of dermatitis on your face, thus avoiding the need to shave for around 6 months with a note from the SMO (although don't get caught doing it, otherwise you'll get charged for self harm under QRs!).
In all honesty, I think the current status quo is quite reasonable - having worked on some Belgian Army bases and seen the state of some of those conscripts of Wallonian extraction and b*m fluff beards, the banning of cultivated facial hair is conducive to good order and discipline (we don't talk about the RN!!)!
Thread title was a bit misleading as you appear to only be concerned regarding facial hair (there were some WAAFs in my days who would have maybe benefitted from some attention in this dept!!), not haircuts in general.
I believe the argument relating to facial hair has always been the sealing of oxygen / NBC masks being virtually non-existent with beards and I can see the logic in this. There is also the issue of tidiness of fungal growth - there are certain people who would look somewhat ridiculous with faial hair whilst others looks would be enhanced!
You could always use a bit of DTD585 (or whatever flavour of hydraulic oil takes your fancy) and inflict a bit of dermatitis on your face, thus avoiding the need to shave for around 6 months with a note from the SMO (although don't get caught doing it, otherwise you'll get charged for self harm under QRs!).
In all honesty, I think the current status quo is quite reasonable - having worked on some Belgian Army bases and seen the state of some of those conscripts of Wallonian extraction and b*m fluff beards, the banning of cultivated facial hair is conducive to good order and discipline (we don't talk about the RN!!)!
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RN beards
Permission has to be sought to grow a set, and the wearer had (still?) to submit to an "inspection" after 28 days. Good growth, trimmed etc., then it stayed. If it looked as though it would blow away in a force 3 then it was ordered off.
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Yozzer
Goatees are for some shirt-lifters.
Full sets are for Fishhead shirt-lifters.
Styled haircuts are for the remaining shirt-lifters.
Just an opinion, but look at yourself in the mirror and then choose.
Goatees are for some shirt-lifters.
Full sets are for Fishhead shirt-lifters.
Styled haircuts are for the remaining shirt-lifters.
Just an opinion, but look at yourself in the mirror and then choose.
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I don't see the problem of a well maintained set of lambchops, they could be seen as a good anti-terrorism measure as short hair with burners to the middle of the ear is a bit of a give away.
On the subject of facial hair I remember a female SWO at Cosford who would have given Geoff Capes a run for his money, she was a little scarier as well.
On the subject of facial hair I remember a female SWO at Cosford who would have given Geoff Capes a run for his money, she was a little scarier as well.
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What part of the attestation or commissioning scroll says you're entitled to a life?
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Iv'e never understood the reason why all 3 services cannot enjoy the fashion accessory of either a set or 'tash. These rules have got to be up for change in the future. 
Personally I sported a set whilst in training at Raliegh. On the second last day we got a fire school. Result was I couldn't get a decent seal on the BA mask the Instructor said I should leave the TIT out (On Demand) and then spent the whole exercise hoying fire appliances around and labouring for breath - Saw sense after that and got rid of it!
One thing i've never understood though, is why some guys like to sport 'Bu66ers Grips' (Side burns) - makes you look like a Teddy boy
Personally I sported a set whilst in training at Raliegh. On the second last day we got a fire school. Result was I couldn't get a decent seal on the BA mask the Instructor said I should leave the TIT out (On Demand) and then spent the whole exercise hoying fire appliances around and labouring for breath - Saw sense after that and got rid of it!
One thing i've never understood though, is why some guys like to sport 'Bu66ers Grips' (Side burns) - makes you look like a Teddy boy
Yozzer
Goatees are for some shirt-lifters.
Full sets are for Fishhead shirt-lifters.
Styled haircuts are for the remaining shirt-lifters.
You missed out the other one - 'lamb chops' more properly known as Buggers' Grips! By definition, favoured by shirt-lifters!
If someone wants to look like an arsehole with teeth - they can grow a full set in the RN. Where it probably keeps the face warm when whittling scrimshaw whilst sitting whiling away the lonely hours at sea on an upturned rum keg, or whatever!
In the RAF, surely 'Bomber Command moustaches' went out with Bomber Command?
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Goatees are for some shirt-lifters.
Full sets are for Fishhead shirt-lifters.
Styled haircuts are for the remaining shirt-lifters.
You missed out the other one - 'lamb chops' more properly known as Buggers' Grips! By definition, favoured by shirt-lifters!
If someone wants to look like an arsehole with teeth - they can grow a full set in the RN. Where it probably keeps the face warm when whittling scrimshaw whilst sitting whiling away the lonely hours at sea on an upturned rum keg, or whatever!
In the RAF, surely 'Bomber Command moustaches' went out with Bomber Command?
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BEagle
Careful old chap - I too have a head like a bottom, but without the arsehole or teeth!.
Last CAS used to sport the Grips for many years - certainly not a shirt-lifter though.
Careful old chap - I too have a head like a bottom, but without the arsehole or teeth!.
Last CAS used to sport the Grips for many years - certainly not a shirt-lifter though.
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more properly known as Buggers' Grips! By definition, favoured by shirt-lifters!
Special cycling??
Question for all slug balancers: why bother to grow hair on your filtrum and shave the rest off? Gains no extra time in your cart of a morning.
.......although I have no wish to see Ozzie Osborne replicas wearing HM uniform
One of the smartest, most military mates I knew was called Noel 'Ozzie' Osbourne. But you certainly wouldn't have confused him with that spaced out old pop musician of the same name!
One of the smartest, most military mates I knew was called Noel 'Ozzie' Osbourne. But you certainly wouldn't have confused him with that spaced out old pop musician of the same name!
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What part of the attestation or commissioning scroll says you're entitled to a life?
Hitler...moustache
Stalin...moustache
Saddaamm Husseeiinn...moustache, then beard
OBL...beard
Gengis Khan...long hair
Stalin...moustache
Saddaamm Husseeiinn...moustache, then beard
OBL...beard
Gengis Khan...long hair
Hoon - clean shaven.
No-one wants to see people with blue hair or ZZ Top beards wearing Her Majesty's uniform. Also, those who insist on their right to extremes of fashion are being over-obsessive.
However, the service once more displays its tendency for bottom-inspection and emphasis on niff-naff and trivia at the expense of what should really be important. At a time of massive cutbacks and overstrtch, what do the RAF do? Update the AP on dress standards and issue a new rucksack. Do you have the misfortune to live in multiple-man rooms on a "certain airbase in Norfolk"? Never mind, at least you have a mirror in the shared ablutions so you can check that the sideburns do not pass the "midpoint of the tragus." Is the missus threatening divorce because of another 4 months away? Never mind, lock yourself in the bathroom and shave your neck!
The personnel in the command chain who flout these rules tend to be those with imagination and moral courage; those (outwith ab-initio units) who apply the rules with rigour tend to lack these qualities.
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do the requirements for NBC gear/ O2 masks etc give problems with the old bum fluff??
Why not have different standards? "Parade" standards of freshly-shaved neck and no facial hair outwith the lip-length 'tache and half-length sidies, and more relaxed standards for non-parade occasions. This is what tends to happen by default, bottom-inspectors aside!