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Old 2nd May 2009, 20:30
  #41 (permalink)  
 
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Virgin Atlantic PA

If there were any staff on board when the cabin purser announced the film that was showing - a while ago - he would tell you who was starring in it and include the names of the staff /positioning crew as being in the film. No-one ever asked who these people were as far as I know.

Was quite funny when you heard your names read out!!!
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Old 4th May 2009, 09:02
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This is an apocryphyl one I know, and attributed to a well known US airline. After a particularly heavy and bouncy landing, the announcement was 'Ladies and gentlemen, please remain seated with your seat belts fastened while captain kangaroo bounces whats left of the aircraft to the gate. Thank you for flying with us.'

I liked it anyway.
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Old 4th May 2009, 09:42
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No-one's interested in hearing from the flight deck these days anyway.

I can't be bothered talking to the SLF, nor can most of my colleagues.
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Old 4th May 2009, 10:26
  #44 (permalink)  
 
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No-one's interested in hearing from the flight deck these days anyway.
That's a bit of a statement. For example, I am interested in hearing from the flight deck. And on those rare occasions where flight deck crew go the extra mile and point out interesting or obscure points of interest on the way, I'm sure there are many more people who listen in
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Old 4th May 2009, 10:47
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No-one's interested in hearing from the flight deck these days anyway.
I can't be bothered talking to the SLF, nor can most of my colleagues.
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Old 4th May 2009, 12:04
  #46 (permalink)  

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Heard on one flight:

"This is the Captain. I'll be flying you to Frankfurt. In front of me I can see pretty flashing lights, lots of switches and funny-looking dials. This is my first time in the flightdeck of a jet...."

(short pause, passengers looking worriedly at each other. PA continues)

"....today. I've been flying jets for 20 years. Now I've got your attention, please give equal attention to the important safety information our cabin crew will now give you. Thank you."
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Old 4th May 2009, 16:02
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Egyptair 707, late 70's.

Inadvertent slip on the PA while on approach.

"Please fasten your seatbelts tightly as we will be landing short at Cairo"
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Old 4th May 2009, 20:13
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I recently flew with BA from Heathrow to Geneva and then back again the following day. Same captain for both flights, which I hadn't experienced before. How did I know? Well, I recognised his name. But also because his pre-flight PA was almost word-for-word identical on both flights - right down to the intonation, method of introducing the safety demonstration and the jokes! I couldn't help wonder whether it's always the same. Is this something cabin crew have to get used to?

And it was very good. Practice makes perfect, I guess.
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Old 4th May 2009, 23:41
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N49,

Yes, quite a lot of pilots make the same announcement every time. That's why you rarely see us in the cabin laughing at their jokes, as we've heard it lots of times before (and a vast majority isn't funny anyways )

Gg
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Old 5th May 2009, 00:26
  #50 (permalink)  
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Who's Flying?

Can never understand why Captains' come on the PA and after introducing themselves, say something along the lines of: "I'm Capt Bloggs and alongside me on the Flt Deck is F/O Richard Cranium, Richard will be flying us to xxxxxxxx today." The average SLF hasn't a clue as to why the F/O is "actually" flying the aircraft, in fact I'm sure that some pax are quite perturbed that the Capt appears to be handing control to the "copilot"! Surely there is no need to announce that this is the F/Os "leg", unless the Captain is worried that if anything untoward should happen during the flight it will be attributed directly to him!! As to information about the flight that is relayed over the PA is anybody really bothered who passes the info as long as they know how long the flight is, what's the local time on arrival and the weather at destination?

Last edited by scottpe; 5th May 2009 at 00:39. Reason: Add a sentence
 
Old 5th May 2009, 01:22
  #51 (permalink)  
 
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I see StickItUpYourYoke has been banned PNG, but I do agree with what he says, though not necessarily the way he said it.

When I'm half-way across the Atlantic, enjoying the IFE, I really do not appreciate the movie being interupted, just so that I can be told that we will be arriving three minutes early/late and that it's raining in Newark/Manchester.
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Old 5th May 2009, 07:28
  #52 (permalink)  
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Flying from Tokyo to Taipei, the track takes you past an active volcano called Sakurajima near Kagoshima, Japan. Usually it emits a long plume of smoke but has been known to erupt occasianally with some spectacular fireworks. As we were flying past, the Captain drew the attention of passengers on the left hand side of the airplane to the smoking mountain. Half way through his announcement, the peak erupted - sh!t, yelled the Captain; did you see that!? (I think Old Fella might know who I'm talking about).
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Old 5th May 2009, 12:00
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I haven't heard it done for a while, but a QF skipper used to always get his F/O and S/O or S/O's to join him in 3 or 4 way banter during introductory P/A's.
It would go something like,

Capt: Hello ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain and my name is X
F/O: Hi all, this your F/O and I'm Y
S/O: And I am your S/O Z.
Capt: So Y, what is the weather for our flight expected to be today?
F/O: Fine weather for today, X.
Capt: Great so the flight should be smooth. Z, what is our expected flight time?
S/O: 12 hours and 10 minutes, X.
etc etc.

It was very entertaining and the passengers seemed to really enjoy it.
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Old 5th May 2009, 17:06
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Stick it

No-one's interested in hearing from the flight deck these days anyway.

I can't be bothered talking to the SLF, nor can most of my colleagues.
With an attitude like that we don't want to hear much from you either! Bet you're happy to take the SLF's money - meagre as you may consider it.

Whenever I fly with a crew who can't even be bothered to make the vaguest effort to be pleasant I make a mental note to avoid their company whenever possible in the future though it is usually unnecessary as the company is often not around long enough for it to be an issue.

Pity that so many people consider even basic customer service to be demeaning - they are also, in my experience, usually the ones who are the most demanding when they are being served. Happy flying, Captain - on freighters, perhaps.
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Old 6th May 2009, 15:47
  #55 (permalink)  
 
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QF

Sorry, Qantas.

http://www.pprune.org/cabin-crew/372...fety-demo.html
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Old 6th May 2009, 17:52
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About five years ago, flying back into Birmingham from Copenhagen with SAS...

Captain comes over on the PA just as the aircraft is exiting the runway 'Welcome to Manchester, thank you for flying with....' which was drowned out by a fair number of now rather confused passengers exclamations of surprise!

The captain then continued, somewhat sheepishly, 'My apologies, it was Manchester I went to yesterday, today we have landed at Birmingham International Airport'.
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Old 7th May 2009, 07:47
  #57 (permalink)  
 
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I've noticed that over the past year or so there seems to be a culture of self-congratulation breaking out on the PA. A recent BA flight to JFK:
30 minutes out PA: "Ladies and Gentlemen, we will shortly be landing in New York and I'd like to take this opportunity to thank the crew for all their hard work....
Take your seats for landing PA: "Cabin Crew, thanks again for all your hard work.., please take your seats for landing...".
Finally, from the flight deck: "Cabin Crew, thanks very much for all your hard work, doors to manual..."
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Old 7th May 2009, 08:53
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Not sure whether this was commonplace as i only had one chnace to fly in the finest passenger aircraft ever made.

Concorde approaching JFK.

"ladies and gentlemen, because of her delta wings concorde has a higher approach speed than other aircraft. However this isn't a problem as our engines can produce a lot more reverse thrust than most.

A few minutes later we touch down and the aircraft slows down so quickly most passengers wish they had tightened their belts a bit more because they have to extract their noses from the seat in front. Followed by us turning off the runway with most of it unused
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Old 7th May 2009, 11:29
  #59 (permalink)  
 
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Clareprop,

I always cringe when that happens. Makes me embarassed. Thanks should be given in private and face to face, not over the pa.

Gg
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Old 7th May 2009, 12:10
  #60 (permalink)  
 
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Glumgirl

maybe you don't find the jokes funny after you have been on your feet for 12 hours which is understandable.

But we're p1ssing ourselves up front.
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