28th
You are right. Maybe I don't want it enough. If I wanted it enough, then I'd do it. And I can see why you think there may be another reason behind it, because it doesn't sound logical to give up because of one bad experience, does it?
I think I may have over-reacted during my initial dummy spit. But as I left the field after the event I just wanted to forget all about flying. I was thinking about all the money I've spent only to get treated like an idiot. And all the other things I could have spent it on, which would have made me feel a damn sight better than I did then! So the idea of giving up seemed perfectly reasonable.
I still feel that way to some extent, although I can also see that it looks stupid to give up at the last hurdle.
I've had a few moments like the ones you describe, although mostly as a pax. Maybe I should think about those moments to start the positive thoughts going again. Not sure I'd want to get chased by a Tornado though!
Dave