onthefly1 I suggest that you resist the temptation to have some alcoholic drinks prior to flight. What would be a much better solution would be to book yourself onto a "fear of flying" course to better learn to manage the psychological effects. I have assisted on one that was run by Qantas and the participants really appreciated that course.
jolihokistix My personal opinion is that there are elements that can be inherited - especially temperament which would suggest that responses to challenging situations would be the same. I know a few families where the parent has a fear of X and the son/daughter has the same fear. The media and how they beat up a story certainly doesn't help. Don't get me started on learned responses... That's a whole essay there...
Back to onthefly1
Prep for icing? There are protocols and standard operating procedures for dealing with icing conditions. The general rule is that thunderstorms also mean a lot of icing and severe turbulence. Some cells are more vicious than others. Personally, I give them a wide berth.
Can turbulence cause problems? Yes. Are you likely to ever experience severe turbulence, probably no. What you might call severe is by definition moderate. Note, I was not in the aircraft with you, so I can't say definitively. However, I fly a lot (it's my job) and I have never encountered severe turbulence. Moderate, yes. The aircraft are incredibly strong and the tolerances allowed for turbulence far exceeds what I'll put up with. However, there are methods for flying in turbulence that allow the aircraft to "do it's thing". If I (eg) try to control it, there is a risk that I will over stress the aircraft and damage it. Also, you do have to slow down a bit too.
We do have "significant weather" charts to look at and spot the likely areas of turbulence.
Weather radar. It's designed to pick up water droplets. Some of the newer designs will detect movement and give an indication of wind shear. The general idea is, the heavier the rain, that's where the thunderstorm cell is, so avoid that area.
Now to your flight that caused the problems. The very young captain? Well, I fly with guys who are in their mid-forties but look thirty so don't let their appearance dictate your opinion.
There are 2 pilots so it wasn't "just his good idea". If there was no chance, then the flight would have been cancelled and believe it or not, someone would have complained about why the flight didn't go. He did the right thing, kept you all seated, had 2 approaches and diverted. Exactly what you want the pilots to do. The fact he's gone around meant that he's done the right thing safety wise.
When I flew in Australia, the abuse I got from the passengers about not flying at the scheduled time was unbelievable. Never mind that a cyclone (hurricane) had gone through the area only 6 hours ago and we were checking if the runway/airport wasn't flooded or destroyed....
However, I cannot stress enough, get yourself onto a fear of flying course.