Keef ... thanks, I also kicked Santander into touch a couple of months ago.
The "joint account" approach has worked in the past, my son lives in the UK and has handled mail, but it doesn't always fit the bill. Most times it isn't the banks being deliberately obtuse, more that people just don't "listen", or "read" what is in front of them, and go off half-cocked as a result.
My UK bank refuse to give me their telephone number, because - they say - they aren't allowed to use the phone in case they get a hold up and need to dial 999 !!! Eventually, grudgingly, I was given a personal cellphone number for that particular occasion only. The mind boggles.