Here's an oldie, but I'm told its true.
Captain on a Boeing is being Line Checked by famously arsey checker.
In cruise he is served his meal, on a tray, on his lap (this is the one situation where Airbus trumps Boeing).
The checker in the jumpseat pipes up "Captain, what would you do with that tray if you had an engine failure now?"
To which the Captain responds - "I'd do this" - then flings the tray and all it's contents on the checkers lap.
