Firm grip of the non-essential
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: one country, one system
Age: 55
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Firm grip of the non-essential
Ok, I am bored..
Most useless BS nerd question ever to have faced during a check/training by one of the priceless aerosexuals from the respected training department !
My candidates:
1) Total number of static dischargers on the 747, enhanced with the truly fascinating quest for the allowed number of damaged/missing dischargers
(dozens by the way)
2) Location of the megaphone(s) on the main deck
3) only animal not allowed on freighter aircraft ( ok this one was actually mildly funny, it's a skunk..)
4) Max crosswind in Low Visibility in Canada ( on the 747-200, which at the time did not even operate to Canada )
5) Position of the inbuilt ( non-accessible!) ELT
Most useless BS nerd question ever to have faced during a check/training by one of the priceless aerosexuals from the respected training department !
My candidates:
1) Total number of static dischargers on the 747, enhanced with the truly fascinating quest for the allowed number of damaged/missing dischargers
(dozens by the way)
2) Location of the megaphone(s) on the main deck
3) only animal not allowed on freighter aircraft ( ok this one was actually mildly funny, it's a skunk..)
4) Max crosswind in Low Visibility in Canada ( on the 747-200, which at the time did not even operate to Canada )
5) Position of the inbuilt ( non-accessible!) ELT
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Krug departure, Merlot transition
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OK you were clearly on the Classic... 
-Definition of Icing Conditions verbatim of course
-Number and position of O2 bottles for crew and supernumerary
-Is Durian allowed on board and if so where?
-How many gear doors on the B742
-Main gear tilt combinations for Air/Ground sensing
-Definition of Icing Conditions verbatim of course
-Number and position of O2 bottles for crew and supernumerary
-Is Durian allowed on board and if so where?
-How many gear doors on the B742
-Main gear tilt combinations for Air/Ground sensing
A long time ago on the TriStar, doing walk-round.....
Checker:- How many fan blades on the RB211?
Me:- Dunno!
Checker:- You should!
Me:- Why?
Checker:- So that you'll know if one is missing!
Me:- But there would be a f.....'in big hole!
Checker:- How many fan blades on the RB211?
Me:- Dunno!
Checker:- You should!
Me:- Why?
Checker:- So that you'll know if one is missing!
Me:- But there would be a f.....'in big hole!
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Honkers
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I love the one about the 777 vertically challenged TC who writes BOMB on a piece of paper and places it into the admin bag under the second observers seat to see if you're cockpit security check is up to par. He nearly caused a full scale bomb warning because of that silly stunt.
What are the silver plates for on the 777 cockpit floor.
Where's the LOC/GS antenna located.
What are the silver plates for on the 777 cockpit floor.
Where's the LOC/GS antenna located.
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: heads down trying to figure out Chinese RVSM
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I love the one about the 777 vertically challenged TC who writes BOMB on a piece of paper and places it into the admin bag under the second observers seat to see if you're cockpit security check is up to par. He nearly caused a full scale bomb warning because of that silly stunt
He tried that stunt on me so whilst he was conducting the external inspection, I called up on 121.6 for Airport Police and AVSECO to the aircraft IMMEDIATELY, stating we had a serious security breach and a confirmed threat. Then I sat back and watched the excitement unfold.
When he returned back to the flight deck, I explained what I did and he went berserk. Of course the flight was canceled and passengers were protected on other flights etc. Interestingly enough, this was not mentioned in the Friday News propaganda.
Yes, I was called into the MLO's office to explain myself - so I did. I take any category threat seriously.
.......Some of these vertically challenged steroid pumping boys are messed up.
Join Date: Nov 1998
Location: Disneyland - with Mickey Mouse
Age: 54
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I was sitting at Café/Rest. Oolaa the other day sipping my coffee - and behind be sat two CX pilots going through how to deal with an upcoming Command assessment or line check or wtf ever upcoming... Ohhh boy - I felt so sorry for them lads- you guys have to deal with this pathetic **** - still! It never changes huh??.. Pathetic. But, then again - it's a free choice and if you choose to stay - I guess you just deal with all of that wanky ****.
Great stories being posted.. Very enjoyable with a scotch on the side.
Cheers
Great stories being posted.. Very enjoyable with a scotch on the side.
Cheers
short flights long nights
Not from Cathay but.....what is the number of the globe in the Altitude alert light in the F28?
Join Date: Apr 2007
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I used to ask this one when I checked back in the day
What's the max speed for windshield wipers? STUNNED LOOK
A, High.
I loved that one.
And yes, it was a joke at the time as well.
A, High.
I loved that one.
And yes, it was a joke at the time as well.
Join Date: May 2009
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With regards to the HOT AIR P/B, at what temperature will the Fault lt and associated ECAM caution come on?
When that set parameter is reached within the coding, it gives you the warning! Who gives a S**t what that exact value was????
The TC/STC clowns that ask these type of questions are doing it purely to stroke their own egos.
Oh, in case you were wondering:
A. When the duct overheat is detected - 88'C.
Nice to know we are dealing with Big Picture Stuff
When that set parameter is reached within the coding, it gives you the warning! Who gives a S**t what that exact value was????
The TC/STC clowns that ask these type of questions are doing it purely to stroke their own egos.
Oh, in case you were wondering:
A. When the duct overheat is detected - 88'C.
Nice to know we are dealing with Big Picture Stuff