Your discussion of pro/con training at 42 is of course welcome. But just for the record, I was more interested in finding out if 40 is some sort of barrier. I WILL be an old fart going to flight school, decision already made. This is about HOW old I will be.
I don't think I have unrealistic expectations. I just feel I have the time, motivation and most of the money to do it. I do not believe that anybody will hire me off the street just for my shiny new license. If I can work my way towards a paid flying job: jackpot. If not: accept it and get on with life. I will always at the very least have a job to pay for my small mortgage, food on the table and a rusty old car. I have simplified my life and found that it buys you a lot of freedom. Freedom to go fly and try your best at it without depending on 100% success, for example.