Land ASAP As you rightly say anyone whon thinks that Nigels are from the top drawer are about 25 years behind the times. Most accents I hear from Nigels are South London or Regional ones.
As an ex A340 Captain myself I can say that taxying onto the threshold at Heathrow is not a problem regardless of conditions as there is bags of room so tight turns are not necessary. Yes the A340 NWS takes a bit of getting used to and on an icy ramp in a cul-de sac with an incline say then things can get awkward when a sharp turn is required, but onto a long runway at LHR then one has to assume either taxy speed was too fast for the conditions or there was a problem with the FBW nose wheel steering system,which has happened in the past to me once and total steering was lost,fortunately not at a critical phase of taxying. So not lets pre judge this incident until the facts are known.