"On-time performance" at EK is defined as "any flight that leaves the same day it was scheduled".
Pilot to Redcap: "So how is boarding going?
Redcap: "Ohhhhh Kaptin, all passengers on board. Except for 43 who are missing. We will begin offloading their bags at scheduled departure time."
Pilot: "Ok, so how long will that take?"
Redcap: "Ummm...I think...maybe...ten minutes Kaptin."
Pilot: "So, about 30 minutes then?!"
Redcap: "Yes Kaptin." *wobble wobble wobble"