Bing-bong "This is your captain/flight attendant/whoever..."
The BA strike raises an interesting question. Is it time for a root and branch change to the time-honoured rituals performed by flight-deck and cabin crew before they just get on with what they're supposed to do and take us where we've paid to go?
Why are we passengers constantly talked at and bonged at ?
Why do cabin crew and flight crew love the sound of their own dreary voices so much?
Why are we instructed to do this and do that and "wait until the seat belt sign is extinguished", and all the rest of this ritual of rubbish we have to put up with day after day.
I don't want to watch another lifejacket demonstration. I think I've got the idea now.
I don't want to be told how to fasten my seat belt - it's blindingly obvious.
I don't need to be reminded to read the safety card - we know how to evacuate the aircraft - in reality it's every man for himself and the devil take the hindmost.
...And I really don't give a damn what the name is of the captain of the plane - any more than I care who the driver is of my intercity train.
So why don't the cabin crew and flight crew do us all a favour and shut up?