Wow, everyone has fisked this, so may I have a go?
(1) I fly all the time so why do I need to watch/listen to the safety demo?
Depends. If you have boarded an aircraft which is has been refuelled enroute to SYD from LHR and you are occupying the same seat, you'll already have seen the briefing (which, if you're on BA, will be toe-curlingly condescending in its dumbing-down - worth it just for that). It's good manners, though, to gaze at the hosties as they go through the motions.
They don't tell you how to count how many rows are ahead and behind of you. If there's smoke, do you have water and something with which to improvise a smoke mask? How will you get past that obese person behind you if she spills in the aisle? Do you have a torch? How do those doors open, anyway? It may be worth reading the card.
Sentient people will work this out for themselves when boarding, The safety briefing equates to tractor production statistics. Fine by me, as I know that the vast majority of my fellow travellers will (a) have taken no notice; and (b) will have forgotten, or not understood, everything that they've been told.
(6) Why does my Ipod need to be switched off for take off/landing?
So you can hear us peeps!!
Argh - 'peeps'!
Sry d00d i got earpluz in no law gainst tha isit.
People with iPods with cheap ear buds which force me to listen to their drivel should have have their eardrums slowly reamed in perpetuity.
F3G covered off the rest.
Having said all that, strake makes a good point. You could be the lousiest CC in the Universe and we're always more likely to die on the taxi ride to the airport. Primarily, we have the horn-rimmed glasses engineers, then the pilots, then the people who keep the birds running making this industry so safe, by and large. We have seen in the past heroic efforts by CC to safeguard their passengers, and these are rightly lauded.
In the grand scheme of things, though, being aboard an aircraft is probably the least scary thing I've done this week.
SO
SO