Before you two get as far as tongues
Got there about 20 minutes ago - we are getting married tomorrow
For aircraft which do not have a POH, obviously the parallel advice is to use the figures which the designer / LAA / AOPA / BMAA or whoever else regulates the aeronautical contraption o f your choice recommends.....
Well I would use those as a GUIDE - my personal recommendation would be to find the actual stall speed in landing config. and then use this x1.3 for approach speed. This should be very close to, if not the same as, the "published" approach speed.
If it is very different I would refer to the kit provider, my LAA inspector, the LAA and other owners of same aircraft (in that order).
As for gusty landings use the same sources.
Other speeds (e.g. Vne) I stick to the kit providers published data.