From AA SLF's post on page 1:
What ATPL would ever begin their taxi before receiving clearence from the headset operator and "clearing" the tug out of the way??
The most memorable such incident I ever saw in person was in YSCB in the very early 70’s when HM was out touring the colonies and was doing so in Ron Raff’s VIP BAC111. Come her departure from YSCB, (with the whole nine yards of pomp and circumstance, including the GG, the PM and camera crews from all four Australian television networks along with a relatively large crowd of onlookers), it was very,
very windy.
Let’s set the scene in detail so it’s quite clear in everyone’s mind. YSCB’s VIP apron is to the south of the 34 Squadron hangar, with the area for the guard of honour and the seats for VIPs immediately in front of it. The VIP aircraft always line up facing east so the VIPs can turn for one last photo op and give their adoring subjects one last wave before they step through the aircraft door and have their first (doubtlessly long awaited) gin and tonic.
In Canberra, there’s frequently a westerly wind, more often than not a
strong westerly wind (which is fortuitous, since it means the hats of the guard of honour end up strewn among the parked helicopters rather than out on the active runway, which is immediately to the west of the apron).
And as I’ve said already, this day it was very,
very windy. So much so, that the captain of the VIP BAC111, (for the sake of anonymity, we’ll call him “Flight Lieutenant Smith”), decided it was too strong to start the engines with his tail into wind.
Now logic would dictate a reeeeeaaaaaly simple answer to a problem as straightforward as that ….wouldn’t it? Park the aircraft into wind for engine start.
Ahhh, no, dear reader. You are not allowing for the (senior) military mind.
The PowersThatBe decided that it would be completely beneath HM’s dignity to have to board the aircraft through the smaller catering door on the right side of the aircraft if the -111 was facing west. And they couldn’t have her walking all the way around to the far side of the aircraft to ascend the steps out of sight of the cameras and the adoring crowd. She would have to board as usual and the aircraft would have to be parked as usual and “Flt Lt Smith” would have to deal with it.
So, dutiful young officer that he was, “Flt Lt Smith” followed orders. HM arrived, inspected the (mostly hatless) guard of honour, said goodbye to the GG and the PM, ascended the steps, turned for her last wave to the crowd, allowing the cameramen to get their all-important one last photo op, and the doors were closed and the steps pulled away. Now “Flt Lt Smith” wasn’t particularly happy with his orders, so he decided that he’d start only one engine while his tail was facing into wind and turn the aircraft into wind before he started his second engine. Doubtlessly, he informed the groundcrew of this and
thoroughly briefed them on this non-SOP procedure. And everyone understood exactly what the other would be doing. …right? Right.
“Flt Lt Smith” proceeded to start the first engine, doubtlessly watching the EGT gauge very closely to ensure the strong tailwind didn’t cause an overtemp. He then obtained taxi clearance…
…and with every dignitary in the land and four television network camera crews filming his every move, proceeded to taxi (not very smoothly) over the chocks, which were still in place. Now considerable power is required to get the aircraft over the chocks even with both engines operating. With only one, it must be somewhere near takeoff thrust. (It sounded like it to the assembly.)
I’m not sure what was the more arresting sight – the way the aircraft lurched drunkenly as it flopped back to earth having finally scaled the chocks with power rapidly returning towards idle, or the hapless engineer, who was still attached to the left side of aircraft by his headset lead. On the outside of the turn, he was running at full tilt as the -111 turned away from the crowd, blasting them with not inconsiderable jet efflux. What he was saying to “Flt Lt Smith” I don’t know, but I don’t think it was quite within the bounds of normal enlisted man-to-officer military protocol.
I’ve always wondered at the scene inside the aircraft cabin, with the Royal party quite possibly on their Royal derrieres on the floor, and I’ve often wondered at the PA “Flt Lt Smith” might have made after departure.
If anyone believes this unlikely tale might be untrue, I’m sure there is quite memorable footage of the incident in the film archives of all four Australian television networks.