You're having a laugh, right?
Unless you get off on futility, humiliation and pain, why even try cancelling a Ryanair flight? What's your friend expecting, a partial refund or something?
This is part of the implicit deal with Ryanair: if all goes well, OK, but if anything goes wrong (either a cancellation or delay on their side, or a change of plans on your side), you're screwed. Forget it - the money is down the drain. O'Leary ain't giving it back to your friend. Was the cancellation line a premium-rate number? Wouldn't surprise me.